Torn (17 page)

“Please.” I gave him a warm
smile. I loved that he knew what my favorite drink was without asking me. He
was very observant. “You look smart. Do you usually dress up for Thanksgiving?”

“No,” boomed Nate’s voice as he
shut the door. “He was in sweat pants too, until you texted to say you were
coming over. He could have set a world record for a shower and outfit change.”

“Nate,” Josh grumbled as he
reached for a glass.

“And what about you? I don’t
warrant a shower and some fancy clothes?”

“I know better than to try and
impress you. You’ll make a decision when you’re good and ready, regardless of
what I’m wearing. Though I am considering taking off my t-shirt if that helps
you reach a conclusion a bit faster.”

“Not fair,” Josh warned, shooting
him a scowl as I laughed.

“Hey, not my fault you don’t work
on your abs as hard as I do, little brother,” Nate chuckled, as he reached over
to ruffle Josh’s hair, making him comb it frantically with his fingers.

“Can we quit with the teasing
before you two end up falling out?” I suggested. “How about you set the table
for the two of you and I’ll heat up the leftovers, then start cooking a proper
meal that you can have later or save for tomorrow.”

“With Nate’s appetite, he’ll be
ready for a second meal later,” Josh called from where his head was stuck in
the fridge, rooting out my juice.

“You can talk, but I am unusually
hungry lately,” Nate confirmed, with a look in my direction that made it clear
exactly what he was talking about. The golden flecks in his eyes were almost a
burnt orange as he openly raked his gaze over my body.

“Behave,” I mouthed.

“Where’s the fun in that?”

“How’s your mom today?” I asked
as I started opening the boxes, and Nate sauntered around me to grab some
plates.

“Same as usual, virtually
comatose already.”

“Should I plate her up something?”

“Wouldn’t bother,” Josh confirmed
as he poured my drink into a glass. “She’s always worse on an official holiday.
She’d likely throw the plate, and its contents, against the wall.”

“It’s so sad,” I sighed, as Nate
popped the plates next to me and handed me a serving spoon so I could start
dishing up. “I wish there was something I could do to help.”

“You are,” he said quietly,
putting his arm around me, his fingers squeezing my hip as he kissed my temple.
“You’re here feeding us. We haven’t had a decent home-cooked meal since Dad
died, other than the ones you’ve made us.”

“Nate, you gonna stop feeling up
Sky and help me set the table or what?” Josh asked. I was surprised to hear the
firmness in his voice. I’d never seen him stand up to his brother, but that was
exactly what he was doing now. He didn’t like that Nate was touching me.

“Keep your hair on, little
brother. Not that you have much choice, you’ve got so much someone’s going to
mistake you for a girl someday soon,” he teased as he slowly let go of me.

“It suits him slightly shaggy. Besides,
with your masculine, handsome Hudson looks, no one could ever mistake him for a
girl.” I sent a smile Josh’s way, but he didn’t relax until Nate had moved away
from me and joined him over by the dining table. I finished plating up as I
heard them arguing in hushed tones. Was this seriously about me? It hadn’t been
an issue since the uncomfortable ride home from that first practice game, when
they’d all made their feelings clear. I hated people trying to force me to move
at their pace, but if I wanted to keep the peace, I knew I couldn’t stall my
decision for much longer. I’d seen and talked to other guys around campus,
never without the watchful eye of Josh and Billy on me. But none of them
stirred any form of interest, not the way these two brothers did. Was I really
willing to lose one of them in my life for the sake of having more than I already
did with the other? I was so confused.

I took Josh’s plate over first
and suggested he start, rather than wait while Nate’s heated up. I then stuck a
thermometer in the turkey that Nate had started to cook. He hadn’t even put
butter under or over the skin, or put any herbs on it, so I diced up some
butter before handing him his meal, then went back to try my best to prepare it
properly without burning my fingers. I managed to chop his peeled and oddly cut
potatoes into small bite-sized pieces to cook evenly and put them on to boil,
then turned my attention to the stuffing as I watched them polishing off their
plates like they hadn’t eaten in days. It made me smile to see them so content.
I washed my hands and cut them a good slice of pumpkin pie each, heating that
in the microwave too. There was no whipped cream in the fridge, but honestly,
Mom’s dessert was good enough on its own.

“Jesus,” Josh mumbled as he
worked his first forkful around his mouth. “This is amazing.”

“Don’t speak with your mouth full,”
Nate warned, giving him a light clip around the back of the head. I chuckled
quietly. There were only two years between them, but sometimes it was easy to
forget that. Nate had been forced to grow up so fast, and when you saw him with
Josh or Billy, when they weren’t all goofing around, he seemed so mature. Light
years ahead of Josh. What he’d done for his brother, allowing him to remain a
pretty normal eighteen-year-old, was incredible. “Christ, he wasn’t joking. Did
you make this? It’s insanely good.”

“I wish I could take the credit,
but no, it’s Mom’s recipe.”

“I bet you could make one just as
good if you tried, Sky,” Josh called, one of his cheeks bulging like a chipmunk
who was stocking up for hibernation. He winced as Nate cuffed him again, and
hastily swallowed it.

“I bet she could, but she doesn’t
need to hear it, or see it, when you have a load in your mouth. Remember your
manners.”

“Sorry, Sky.”

I flashed them both a smile and
carried on with my prep, noticing that no encouragement was needed for either
of them to come and clean up their plates and put them away. I refused their
help when it was offered. Their kitchen was smaller than mine, and two of them
trying, and probably inadvertently hindering with their lack of skills, would
just slow me down. I told them to go and relax and watch the NFL game, but they
were too polite to leave me and pulled out stools at the island to sit and talk
to me as I worked. Nate talked about how much he was looking forward to his baseball
season kicking off for real in February. Josh complained that if all Nate was
going to do was bore us with baseball talk, he’d rather go and watch the football
game, so he headed off to position himself on the couch as he grabbed the
remote.

“Nate, what have you done to
these sprouts?” I asked with a laugh, as he got up to pour himself some water.

“I was trying to peel them.”

“You only need to remove a few of
the grubby outer leaves, not keep peeling looking for some kind of mystery
prize inside. There’s virtually nothing left of them.”

“I told him that, but does he
listen to me?” Josh asked, casting a told-you-so look in Nate’s direction.

“Hmmm, the master of sprouts.
When did you suddenly become a genius? All very well, you shouting orders from
your place on the couch this morning, and look, you’re back there again, while
Sky does all of the work.”

“You both said you didn’t want
any help. I was still right though, I said you were taking too much off them.”

“Until your knowledge of sprouts
extends beyond a championship belt in farting them out a few hours later, keep
your opinions to yourself.”

“Not in front of Sky,” Josh
moaned, burying his red face in the plump sofa cushions.

“Josh, everyone farts after
eating sprouts, it’s no big deal,” I laughed.

“I bet you don’t,” he called. “I
can’t imagine you farting, or belching, or anything that’s so uncouth.”

“Ok, now
I’d
prefer not to
have this conversation. I plead the fifth,” I giggled, as Nate looked at me for
confirmation. “You’ll just be having seriously small sprouts for dinner, which
may mean not quite so much gas.”

“Christ, I hope so. I’m lucky I
don’t have to wear glasses, Josh has assaulted my eyes with his toxic vapor so
much over the years. His gas would turn litmus paper bright red.”

“You … well, I heard Ma tell Dad
that it was no surprise you chose pitching over batting since you obviously liked
to fondle balls, judging by all of the stains on your sheets when you were a
teenager.”

“You little–” Nate launched
himself over the back of the couch, taking a surprised Josh to the floor, and I
shook my head as they rough-housed. Was it wrong that the thought of a horny
Nate playing with himself was actually quite arousing? By the time I finished
up, they’d straightened their clothes, both of them raking through their messed-up
hair, as Josh sat back on the couch and Nate padded his way back over to top up
my juice.

“What’s your plan when you
graduate, Sky?” he asked as he carried it for me and we went to join Josh.

“I want to work as a crime
analyst, probably in the Las Vegas Police Department,” I confirmed as I
deliberately sat in the middle of the sofa, so there wouldn’t be any additional
grumblings if I was only sitting next to one of them. “What about you, Josh?
You’ve never said where you want to apply,” I asked. He’d said he wanted to
join the police force as a cop, do his time on patrols and then use his degree
to apply for a management position once he’d paid his dues.

“Has to be Boulder City for me,”
he shrugged, turning up the volume on the TV.

“You always wanted to work out of
Vegas. What’s changed?” Nate asked, sounding puzzled.

“BCPD’s a better option. Are we
watching the game or what?”

“No,” stated Nate firmly, leaning
over me to snatch the remote from Josh’s hand and quickly muting the game. “Since
when? You’ve spent years talking about LVPD.”

“I changed my mind, it’s no big
deal.”

“It
is
a big deal,” Nate
snapped, as I played eye tennis from one to the other.

“Just drop it, Nate,” Josh
warned.

“No, not until you tell me why
you’ve suddenly decided to change your mind on something you’ve wanted to do
all of your life?”

“It’s my life, my choice.” Josh
stated firmly. He got up and disappeared, and I grimaced as I heard his bedroom
door slam.

“What the fuck?” muttered Nate.
He made to stand up and go after his brother, but I placed a restraining hand
on his forearm, amazed he couldn’t see what this was really about. I’d figured it
out during the short conversation.

“Don’t, leave him be.”

“I don’t get it. Since he was old
enough to hold a toy gun, all he’s ever wanted was to be a cop, and nowhere but
LVPD was ever going to be good enough for him.”

“He has his reasons. He’s an
adult, it’s his choice.”

“I don’t get why he wouldn’t talk
to me about this, I thought we were close.”

“He knows he can’t, Nate. That if
he tells you the real reason, you’d never let him do it.”

“Do what?” Nate shook his head,
his face a picture of confusion.

“The last few years you’ve
sacrificed so much to take care of him and your mom. What happens when you
graduate? When some big club comes knocking on your door and offers you an
amazing deal, the kind you only get once in a lifetime? Who’s going to look
after your mom then? That’s why he’s looking at Boulder City, so he can stay
close to home and take care of her so you can go and live your dream, Nate.”

“Like fuck he is,” Nate bit,
anger flaring in his eyes. “I haven’t put myself through so much for him to
give up on his dream. If I move, she’ll come with me.”

“Nate,” I sighed, reaching up to
run my fingers across his cheek. He closed his eyes and hissed as he inhaled
sharply. He was so focused on taking care of everyone, he hadn’t looked at the
bigger picture, at life beyond getting his degree and graduating. “She won’t
even leave her room for Thanksgiving dinner. She’ll never leave the house to
move across the country with you, and Josh knows that. He’s trying to do the
right thing, to let you go and have an amazing career, free of the burdens
you’ve had to carry for so long. Don’t be mad at him, be proud of him. You’ve
helped raise him to be an amazing guy who’d do anything for his family. And he
would, because he adores you.” I dropped my hand from his face and reached for
his hand, squeezing it hard as he shook his head in disbelief, the reality of
their situation finally sinking in.

“How can I be proud? I thought I
taught him to never give up, that if you keep fighting for something you
believe in, you can make it happen, no matter what’s thrown at you.”

“He
is
fighting, he’s
fighting for
your
dreams, Nate. It’s his way of saying thank you for
everything you’ve done for him.”

“He’s talked to you about this,
instead of me?” Nate’s face was a cocktail of hurt and confusion.

“No, he didn’t need to. I’ve
gotten to know him pretty well over the last few months. I also think that if
your mom keeps drinking, at some stage she’ll go into liver failure and she’s
going to need a lot of medical treatment, which isn’t going to be cheap. If you
stay here as a sports therapist and him as a cop, you may make good combined money,
but not good enough to pay for her care and have families and homes of your
own. You’re the only one with the big earnings potential here, Nate. He’s not
stupid, he’s worked that out, and he’s making sure there’ll be nothing standing
in your way of accepting when the deal comes.”