True Devotion (14 page)

“Really?” She’d startled him with that abrupt announcement.

“You’ll paint the ceiling for me?”

“I suppose. What brought this on? Not that I don’t approve; you just haven’t mentioned you were thinking about it.”

She shrugged. “It needs to be done. We were sitting at the kitchen table having tea, and we started talking, and before long we had the kitchen redecorated.” It was more elaborate than that, but Joe didn’t need to know all of it.

Her quest. She was beginning to think about the changes in her life in that way. She liked the word, for it was a journey with a goal. It was the first time in years she was looking forward to something. She had been telling Liz about some of the changes she wanted to make around the house, the excitement obvious in her voice, and was stunned to realize her friend was blinking back tears. Liz laughed, hugged her, and told her it was about time she started living again. The conversation turned to paint colors and wallpaper. They had just gotten started on wallpaper ideas when the doorbell had rung and the roses had arrived.

They reached Joe’s Jeep. Misha was sitting in the front passenger seat, her head out the open window. Her tail beat against the seat as Kelly opened the door. “Backseat, Misha. You’re not sitting in my lap, no matter how adorable you are.”

The dog maneuvered back beside the cooler and Kelly slipped into the Jeep, barely getting the seat belt fastened before Misha leaned over the seat to pant in her ear. Kelly laughed and reached back to ruffle the dog’s head. “Joe, you need to brush her teeth.”

“Next thing you’ll be telling me is she needs to floss.”

She hugged the dog’s neck, burying her fingers in her warm fur. “It wouldn’t hurt.”

Joe started the Jeep and Kelly settled back against the fabric warmed by the sun. The heat felt good, but the sun was already aggravating her headache. She lowered the visor to get a little relief.

“Kelly.” Joe slid off his sunglasses and handed them to her.

The action surprised her. “Thanks.” She slipped them on.

He tapped her nose. “I want them back.”

“I notice you didn’t say when.”

“Don’t worry; I’ll let you know.”

The trip south to the docks near Joe’s home took less than ten minutes even with traffic. When they pulled into the parking lot, Kelly was pleased to see that both Charles and Ryan were already there. They were walking back along the pier toward them, eating ice cream cones. So much for the vague concern Charles didn’t know what his son was doing. Kelly slid from the Jeep and waved. She felt more than a little self-conscious about meeting Charles again—talking to him on the phone was one thing; seeing him was another. She didn’t exactly want to talk about the gifts in front of Joe.

Ryan, no longer on crutches, came ahead of his father to join them. “Hey, Kelly.”

“Hi, Ryan. I hear you want to go sailing.”

“I can’t wait. It’s been a while.”

“You’re going to love it,” she promised, his enthusiasm contagious. She helped Joe unload the cooler. Misha was looking at the ice cream cone Ryan held. Kelly laughed and nudged the dog to move over. “This is Joe’s dog, Misha. She’s coming with us.”

“Really?”

“She loves the water.”

Charles joined them. “It’s nice to see you again, Kelly.”

She did her best not to let his appreciative gaze fluster her. “Hi, Charles. Can you come with us?” she asked, ignoring the fact Joe would probably not make the offer.

“I wish I could, but I’ve got a meeting with Admiral Stone in about forty minutes.” Charles glanced over at Joe. “I appreciate this, Lieutenant. My son was thrilled with the offer.”

“It’s no problem. I’ll enjoy having him aboard. He can take the pressure of being the only crewman off Kelly.”

“I can help with the sails?” Ryan asked eagerly.

“You bet.”

Kelly relaxed at Joe’s easy smile. He might have some reservations about Charles, but it was clear he and Ryan had struck up a friendship.

“Kelly, show me the boat?” Charles asked.

“Sure. Joe, what can I carry down?”

“Take the cushions.”

In another few months the sailboat would be a jewel, but at the moment it looked sadly worn-out. Joe had been focusing on safety, seaworthiness, and sails, not appearance. “This is it.” She expected a comment from Charles, but he held his opinion and stood back, inspecting the boat. She credited him with that foresight, for despite its appearance, the boat was fundamentally sound and would someday make Joe a nice profit when the restoration was finished. She stepped down onto the deck and stored the gear.

“I bet she’s a pleasure to sail on a windy day.” Charles stepped down beside her.

“Fabulous. Once you’ve sailed, you never want to go back to a powerboat,” Kelly replied, taking a gentle dig at his choice of boat.

“It’s easier to fish from a powerboat.”

“But not as romantic.”

“True.”

Aware she was getting in over her head with where the conversation was heading, she turned her attention to removing the bench cover so she could get to the lockers underneath. “Where do you have your boat docked?”

“Down by the Bay Bridge. How long would it take to sail to Catalina Island?”

“Depends on the wind. The round trip makes for a great Saturday.” She and Nick had made the trip many times.

“We could have lunch there some afternoon if you don’t mind taking my boat.”

Kelly glanced up from the locker padlock she was opening. Was he asking for a date? Charles was watching her with a twinkle in his eyes. He had said she would owe him one, and this request might actually be useful to her. “I rarely turn down an invitation for a meal,” she finally replied.

“Good.”

Thank you, Charles.
He had just given her something she was going to need—a way to extricate herself when Joe tactfully said he wanted them to remain only friends. She could at least assure him she wasn’t going to make a nuisance of herself, that she already had lunch plans with Charles. It might be enough to keep her friendship with Joe intact and unchanged—that desperately mattered to her.

Misha barked from the pier, her body quivering with excitement as she looked at the boat. Kelly grinned and folded her arms. “Jump, Misha. I’m not going to lift you across. I learned my lesson last time.”

“What happened?”

After several false starts, Misha launched herself across, skidding on the deck with her feet going all directions. Kelly laughed. “That, except I was the one doing the skidding.”

She glanced over at Ryan, judging his size. “Let’s get you in a life vest.” She handed him one from the locker. “See how that fits.”

Ryan put it on. Charles helped him straighten the straps around the back. “Wear the vest the entire time you are out on the water.”

“I will, Dad.”

“Listen to Kelly and Joe.”

Ryan looked embarrassed. “I already promised.”

“Just checking.” Charles glanced at his watch. “I’ve got to head to my meeting. I’ll be at the waterfront restaurant next to where we bought the ice cream; come join me when you get back.”

Ryan nodded.

Kelly slipped on her own vest. “I’ll make sure he has fun.”

“Make sure you have fun as well,” Charles reminded her. He stepped back up onto the pier. “Thanks, Kelly.”

“My pleasure.”

She watched him walk back up the pier, pause on the way to speak briefly to Joe, then walk toward the restaurant. He was a nice guy, but she was way out of her league with him.

Twelve

* * *

J
oe arrived with the last of the gear. Having sailed with Joe frequently over the years, Kelly knew the routine for getting underway. Joe was a great instructor, and she enjoyed listening to him as he walked Ryan through the steps, letting the teen do many of the tasks rather than just observe.

They were soon out on the calm waters of San Diego Bay, and it was time to raise the mainsail. Kelly was relieved to find herself up to the task. It wasn’t hard, but it took strength and a steady hand on the ropes and winches. The fabric became taut in the wind and the boat leaped forward.

Ryan laughed. “This is awesome.”

It helped having Ryan with them for it kept Joe from focusing on her. The water skimmed by, so near Kelly could almost reach out and touch it. She swallowed hard at the near vertigo she felt when she looked down. This was awful.

The water was calm in the bay, swells one to two feet. She had only to brace herself against the constant tilt from the wind-filled sails to keep steady, but today she also kept her hand firmly on the railing when not required to be at one of the sails. As time passed, her fingers relaxed their white-knuckle grip. The irrational fear of being flung into the water and held under was fading. She had always loved the water, had been swimming from her earliest memories. Joe had been right to get her back out on the water as soon as possible. Some of her frustration directed at him had been spurred by the dread of facing this. Considering she was due back at work on Tuesday afternoon, it was a good thing she was getting this reaction behind her now.

The wind blew her hair around, making her wish she had taken time to French braid her hair, rather than simply pull it back. She dug out the sunscreen and applied it liberally out of habit. Misha joined her at the bench, and she wiped a bit of it on her muzzle, laughing at the dog.

She spent the first hour tacking sails as Joe sent them around the bay, showing Ryan how to work with the wind. Ryan was hanging on Joe’s every word, and Kelly heard the number of SEAL questions mixed in with sailing questions. Joe had another future recruit in the making.

Kelly was very aware of Joe watching her. Finally deciding that keeping her distance was just piquing his interest, she brought Joe and Ryan cold sodas and opened Joe’s for him.

“Thanks. Want to take her?”

Normally she would be eager to take the wheel, pit her skill against the water and wind. It was beyond what she wanted to face today. “I’ll pass.”

He studied her face, then nodded. “You look much better than you did thirty minutes ago.”

“I looked that green?”

“White. It’s just water. It doesn’t mean to be threatening.”

She looked forward at Ryan, now in the front of the boat laughing with Misha as she stood with her front legs up on the bench, her face pointed into the wind. “Ryan doesn’t seem bothered by it.”

“You promised him you wouldn’t let him drown. There wasn’t anyone there to tell you that.”

She blinked. He did understand. He was so confident, so comfortable in the water that she forgot sometimes just how well he could truly empathize. She felt vaguely ashamed that she expected him to criticize her fear. “Have you ever almost drowned?”

He hesitated, and she accepted the disappointment that he couldn’t answer. So many things she would like to know about him, even about Nick, but could never be told.

“A mission about a year after I got pinned with my Trident—we were going out a reconfigured submarine missile tube to launch one of the SEAL’s underwater delivery vehicles from the submerged deck. It was cold, dark, hard work that gave no room for error. There was an equipment failure on my air pack, and I had to buddy breathe back into the tube. It took them more than a minute to decompress the tube. It wasn’t just holding my breath; it was being sealed in what felt like a coffin. It was hard not to panic.”

She was surprised he had told her specifics, even if it was almost a decade old. “Thanks.”

“We’ll go swimming later, and you’ll find you can put it behind you.” He obviously saw her discomfort. “I’ll be right beside you.”

“Yes.” She grimaced, remembering the taste of the salt water. “It’s going to be cold.”

“The ocean is this time of year.” He nodded toward Ryan. “He’s going to be a good deckhand.”

“Yes, he is. Thanks for doing this.”

“I like him.”

“So do I. He’s hitting you up with more questions than just sailing.”

“What can I say? Kids just want to be like me.” They shared a smile; then he nodded to the clock in the dash. “Unfortunately, it’s time we head back in. Charles will be waiting.”

“Yes.” They had been out on the water almost an hour and a half. Kelly buried the shiver at the knowledge that once they dropped off Ryan, they would head out of the sheltered water of San Diego Bay to the open sea. Joe believed she could handle it, and she had no choice about the matter. The fact one rescue had come dangerously close to ending in tragedy was something she had to deal with. She only hoped she didn’t disappoint both Joe and herself.

* * *

Joe tossed back his head, flinging the cold water away. “Ready?”

They were anchored off Torrey Pines Reserve near Del Mar, having sailed up the coast. Kelly, sitting on the edge of the sailboat, was worrying the cut on her bottom lip. Her tension was palatable. Joe tried to make his smile reassuring, wishing he could do this for her. She couldn’t stop the fear she was feeling. There was a very good reason for it, but she would have to consciously overrule it. At his insistence, she wore a life jacket over her swimsuit; she was likely going to get a nice flashback the first time her head went under the cold water.

“Don’t move.”

“I’ll be right here,” he reassured her.

She turned her back to the water as a diver would. He watched her take a deep breath, then force herself to relax and fall back. It wasn’t a graceful way to enter the water, but it was easier than jumping in as he had done. She wouldn’t go as far down in the water.

He moved fast to make sure his hand was on her arm as she came back to the surface. Her face was sheet white. His hand tightened. “Breathe.”

Her eyes closed as she sucked in a deep breath. “Sorry.”

“You’re doing fine.”

She settled her hands on his shoulders. “It’s cold.”

She was looking at him rather than the water. He pushed her hair back for her as she showed no inclination to relax her grip.