Until You Believe Me (8 page)

I couldn't speak. I didn't trust my voice. All I could do was put my hand on Connor's knee. He quickly covered it with his own and we drove the rest of the way back to campus in silence.

Once Connor parked, he took a deep breath and looked at me. He gave me a small smile, it didn't quite reach his eyes. The glassiness was back. Not as much as last night, but there was still a hint of it. My heart beat as if it made the decision before I did. I leaned in, slowly closing the gap between us and my lips softly landed on his. His hand gently squeezed mine. I slowly leaned back into my seat.

"Thank-you," I said as his lips slowly spread into a smile, not quite his brilliant grin, but I would take it for now.

"You're welcome although my dad pales in comparison to what you just gave me." His hand went to my face and was gently stroking my cheek.  My eyes closed and this time our lips met in a deeper kiss, still gentle but more feeling and more emotion. His lips felt soft against mine and I could smell his cologne. I began to feel the same way as last night, the safe and content part. Way too soon we pulled away and he rested his forehead against mine.

"This is heaven Madison. I swear, I don't know how you do it. You don't need to say anything and I feel perfectly comfortable. I was in pieces last night, scared that I had scared you away, or hurt you or made you uncomfortable. Never in my life would I ever-."

I held a finger to his lips. "Stop. This is perfect and nothing is going to ruin it. Thank-you for showing me tonight. You look like him you know. You have his eyes, and his smile - but better."

I couldn't help but smile when I saw the hint of his 60-watt grin.

"What the hell are you doing to me? I feel ten years younger and happier than a man should admit." He leaned  against the back of his car seat and let out the first laugh I had heard from him in far too long.

The sound of his phone startled me.

He looked apologetically at me as he hit the accept button.

"I'll be there in a minute...yep...thanks." He sighed and ended the call.

"Is it-?" Before I finished my thought he shook his head.

"No, it's Chantel. She's waiting in the admin building for me to brief her team on the install. I've got to get up there and get them going." He sounded wistful, almost sad as he turned off the car.

"I understand. I should get home anyway and get to bed. I didn't sleep well last night either." I gathered my bag as I opened my door and slid out. The rain had left behind just a few stray drops and the sound of cars driving on wet roads.

Connor walked me to my car, and before I opened my door he pulled me to him. "You're something else Madison, I wish you knew that."

I gave a sad smile. "Maybe if you keep saying it, I'll start to believe you."

Connor pushed my hair from my face and placed a kiss on each of my cheeks, my forehead and finally a light kiss on my lips.

"Go to work, the minions need their fearless leader." I smiled at him.

"Everyday...until you believe me." he said as he started to walk away.

I smiled watching him walk away. The warm and fuzzy feeling returned as I drove the short ride home.

Chapter 10

The next day was equally gloomy although my mood didn't reflect it.

I thought about Connor taking me to see his father and hearing him tell the story of how it came to be. I was saddened by the thought that if it were me in the same situation, I don't know if I would have shared that with him. It made me sad because I felt close to Connor, but it also made me appreciate how brave Connor was in taking that chance.

That thought was stuck in my head throughout the day. As I bounced from class to class I felt content and happy. This newfound contentment shone through as I felt myself let go and speak more openly to my students. I felt more passion when I spoke of The Romantics, I felt like for the first time I truly understood why Wordsworth and Coleridge could sit and think and just be content in nature and the world. They didn't feel voids and if they did, they filled them with things they enjoyed. I was happy and for the first time in 27 years I enjoyed every minute of my day.

With a renewed outlook that I could only thank one person for I marched to the office. I had to pick up a couple of things before heading out to final class. As if my cheeks didn't hurt enough that day, I grinned even bigger when that white square was hanging from the cork board.

Not only was there one, but three hanging from there and I took them in to open them. I was a bit confused when all three of them read the same thing

Madison,

You are something else

Connor

These were not on the traditional letterhead but instead looked like copies of the same note. I was confused and admittedly a little sad to not see something new and personal from Connor. I decided not to dwell and instead packed my things and went back out for the last class of the day.

Though my mood was excellent, my students hardly felt the same way. As they were working on a short response assignment one student, Justin who was well known for being quite slack came up. I looked up, awaiting his question or excuse to leave when he set a white envelope on my desk with a smile and returned back to his seat.

I couldn't hide my confusion. It was the most bizarre thing I had seen, I opened the envelope almost afraid of what I might find inside.

Madison,

You are something else

Connor

I looked at Justin though he seemed to be entirely too engrossed in his writing.

Before I knew it five other students had approached me and done the same thing. All of the papers had read the same thing. My brain spent the rest of class trying to figure out how this happened. Was it a joke? How could Connor get to my students? It seemed really bizarre.

After awkwardly dismissing them, one more student approached me and handed me an envelope. At this point I was halfway between giddy and mortified, I thanked her as she left. When all of the students had left I opened the last envelope.

Madison,

I told you, everyday until you believe me. And lastly, you are something else, beautiful and charming and electric. There. One time for each day I've known such an amazing person. Don't ask how I've done it, I'm not telling. Stop by on your way out. Until then.

Connor

Today made nine. He had planned to make sure I saw it nine times. My eyes slightly prickled with tears. Never had I met anyone so thoughtful.

I packed the notes in my bag and set out. I had to stop by and pick up some things from the office before I headed home. This meant I had to quickly get my things so I could go see Connor.

I finally arrived at the trailer and knocked. The familiar voice beckoned me to come in and the moment my eyes fell on him I felt at peace. It was a perfect day but seeing him so normal, how i've seen him everyday felt right.

I tried, but failed to hold in my smile.

"Well, here I thought you were going to stand me up. Or that my bribe didn't pay off."

"Bribe? How much did you pay them?"

He laughed aloud, which only added to my warm and fuzzies. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"You lie. How did you do it?"

"I don't know what you're talking about. I've been right here, working my tail off. You know, keeping track of the minions and such. What, you look like you've had an exciting day, do you want to tell me about it?" Leaning back in his chair, a large smirk plastered on his smug face made me want to run to him and spend the next year of my life kissing him. Smug and playful Connor was pretty hot.

Two could play at that game. "Nope, just a boring old day at school. Not quite as glamourous as Super Construction CEO. I'd love to sit and boss around the little people all day. All I do is mold the young minds of our future."

His laugh was low and growly and utterly sexy. He got up and walked over to me and wrapped his arms around me. He was warm and his skin was soft, I just closed my eyes and enjoyed the feeling.

It was much too soon before he released me from his arms.

"I'm planning on leaving here in the next hour. I need to drive down to the beach to bid a job for the fall. I won't be back until Friday. But I needed to ask you something."

To see his face go from playful to serious kind of freaked me out and made me nervous.

"Ok? What is it?"

He reached in his pocket, holding something in his hand and placed it in mine. "I want you to come up on Friday when you get out of here. Let yourself in, I'll be home that evening. I want you to spend the weekend. Now I say that in the most non sleazy guy way. You're more than welcome to stay in my room alone...or not. I just want you to stay the weekend. No expectations, I just want to spend time with you. Uninterrupted." His face was slightly drawn with his eyes casting a nervous glance.

The key felt weighty in my hand. My chest felt slightly heavy at the thought of a weekend of interrupted Connor time. That was a lot of time for uncomfortable boundaries to come up. On the other hand the thought of not leaving him was enticing.

"What time will you be in on Friday?"

"No later than seven, I'll make sure."

"Be ready to eat when you get in."

His face lit up as the words left my mouth. He leapt up and hugged me tight and my feet briefly left the floor.

"I hate the thought of being gone until then but knowing you'll be there when I get home will keep me going. Thank you." He smiled down at me, every line on his face was from his bright smile.

"Please be safe. Keep me updated on how you are, where you are. Where are you staying?" I suddenly felt nervous, thinking of him a couple hours from here. He didn't need a nagging mother but the thought of him being out of this bubble I was so used to was a little frightening.

"I'll just be in a hotel. I'll be sure to keep you in the loop. Besides I can't get hurt, I have Friday to be ready for."

I put my hand on his chin, making sure he was looking at me. "I mean it, be safe. I will freak out if I don't hear from you. Regularly. Like tonight when you get in. If you come in with one hair on your head out of place I will murder you and whoever is responsible." I let go and backed a little away from him.

"I do believe that was an entirely sexy manifestation of your feelings for me. Which makes me extremely intrigued about this weekend." His eyebrows danced on his face and I felt myself blush. I smiled, knowing he was teasing me, but deep inside I felt a nugget of nervousness? Inhibitions? Fear? I quickly pushed it aside knowing I had 2 more days to live with it.

"I'll let you get out of here, I'll see you Friday night." I hugged him tight, breathing in his cologne and listening to his heartbeat.

"Until then Madison." He bent and gave me a soft kiss that put goosebumps all over my body.

I smiled as I left the trailer.

Chapter 11

Thursday was the worst day of the week. I had gotten a text when Connor had gotten settled last night. Waking up today knowing I wasn't going to see him made it hard to get out of bed. It had hardly been any time at all yet I felt out of my routine not stopping to see him.

Class went as usual, I had to dodge some questions from students who had heard through the grapevine about my notes yesterday. Thinking of the notes only made me feel more lonely. I hated to admit it but I missed him. I hadn't realized that I had truly started to care about him until he wasn't there. I knew I had feelings for him but I hadn't admitted it until this moment.

When I was back in my office I started thinking about this weekend. He had taken such a leap of faith by sharing his father's story with me. He had trusted me with information that some of his family didn't even know yet. I made some mental notes of questions I still had about his father and the business.

My cell phone rang and I felt my stomach turn with nervous excitement. When I looked at the screen I saw it was my mother. While deep down I knew I was disappointed, I was still happy for some company.

"Hey Ma, how are you?"

"I find it hard to believe that my daughter is alive. I haven't heard from you in awhile."