Authors: Bria Starr
“What’s that?”
“I’m adventurous. I up and do things spontaneously. So join me. No, we didn’t plan this, but we can just go. What do you say?”
“This is not what I expected to do today. Good thing I don’t work tomorrow.”
“Don’t worry, I’ll take care of you,” he says seductively.
“Yes, I’m sure you will.”
*****
I did surprisingly well while snowboarding. I hope we go more often now that I’m getting the hang of it. When we get back to Logan’s, he offers me a bath in his tub, alone this time, and I accept. As I relax, I think about Logan and how he amazes me every day. I’m starting to fall for him all over again.
After I’m dressed and he’s had his shower, we sit on the couch and watch a movie. Logan stretches out his arm, inviting me to snuggle up next to him. Oh, what the hell. We both want it. I scoot a couple of feet over and relax into bliss. Logan has the warmest body heat I’ve ever felt, and since I always seem to be cold, I soak it all up. As we watch the movie, Logan uses his fingertips and slowly makes trails up and down my arm, giving me goosebumps.
“Somebody likes it when I do this.”
I look over at him while trying to rub them away. “I’m just cold.”
“Right. Whatever you say.”
“Shh, I’m trying to watch the movie.” But instead, I think about how much I feel at home, sitting on his couch, in his house, in his arms.
“Are you going to stay over?”
Logan asks me.
“Um, I guess I figured I’d go home when the movie was over.”
“Or you could stay. I promise to behave.”
I want to stay with him. I really do. “Al
l right, but only if you promise to keep your hands to yourself. I’m not having sex with you.”
“That’s fine, but I’m going to cuddle the shit out of you.”
I laugh. “Now
that
I can handle.”
***
**
When we wake up on Sunday, we spend the day together. We go outside and take a long walk around his nice neighborhood. There
are a few houses that still have Christmas lights up, and even a couple that have snowmen outside.
“When was the last time you made a snowman?” Logan asks me when we get back to his driveway.
“Oh man, I don’t even know. Not since I was really little with my brothers.”
“Want to help me make one?”
“Seriously?” I ask, a little too excited. I look down at the snow that had fallen the night before; it’s really the best kind of snow. The kind you can pack really well instead of the light fluffy stuff that will just fall apart in your hands. The perfect snowman making snow!
“I think I have some carrots in the fridge. I know I don’t have any coal, but we’ll figure something else out. Come on,” he says, guiding
me towards his front yard. He bends down and starts packing snow into a ball, so I do the same. After we each get a huge ball, we start rolling them around in the snow to make them bigger.
“How big are we making it?” I ask, winded.
“As big as we want. Yours will be the middle one. I’ll keep going on this one for the bottom while you start making the head.”
I start a new ball as Logan keeps rolling his giant one around his yard. We meet back where we started and stack them, one by one. The snowman is taller than I am, but not nearly as tall as Logan. He runs inside for a few minutes as I start smoothing the snow out with my gloves, making it nice and round. Logan brings out a small cardboard box full of stuff, sets it down, and runs out to his backyard, coming back with two long sticks and two big, black, rounded rocks. We start going through the box
, and I find a hat, scarf, gloves, a carrot, and a bag of M&M’s.
I grab the carrot and try to shove it in the middle of the face while Logan takes the rocks and digs out some snow to fit them in. I open the bag of M&M’s. “You’ve been holding out on me,” I say, putting a small handful into my mouth. I pour some into Logan’s hand and grab another small handful, giving our snowman a colorful mouth, then take the scarf and tie it around the neck while Logan puts in the sticks for arms and adds the gloves. I hand Logan the hat
, and that completes our snowman.
An hour
later, we step back and admire our masterpiece.
“We did well,” I comment.
“Are you kidding? He’s perfect,” Logan says, putting his arm around me.
So many childhood memories flood through me. “This was a great idea, Logan.”
“It’s the only kind I have.” He winks at me and then kisses the top of my snow-covered hat.
“Funny.”
“Want some hot chocolate?”
“Yes, please.”
“Come on, I’ll start the fireplace so you can warm up and I’ll make you some.”
***
**
After one of the best weekends I’ve ever had, I have to go back to work. My weekends seem to keep getting better and better. I’m feeling pretty good as I get to my desk. You can imagine my surprise when Zach approaches me and asks, “Do you want to go out to lunch with me today?”
“Are you serious?”
“Of course I am.”
“Absolutely!” That came across a little desperate.
We go to The Edge just like we used to, and there’s an uncomfortable silence on the way there. I get the feeling that he’s still hurt, but is trying to forgive me
.
I wave at Jen, and we head towards our regular table and order. He looks at me, and I give him a small smile. I’m happy to be here again.
“So how have you been?” he starts out.
“I’m good, Zach. How are you?”
“It’s Zachary, and I’m pretty good too.”
“Zachary it is.”
“You look good. You seem happy.”
“Thank you. I think I am.” I pause. “Are you happy?”
“Not as happy as you, apparently.”
“Well, I’m happy you asked me out to lunch.”
“Me too. Sorry I haven’t been very friendly. I just had to sort some stuff out, but I think I’m good now.”
“Zachary, I’m sorry-”
“You don’t have anything to be sorry about.”
I feel sad. “Yes, I do.”
“No, you don’t. Look, you never promised me anything. You never led me on, or made me believe we were anything but friends. It’s my fault. I’m the one who fell for you. I wanted to wait until the time was right, but I waited too long.” He shrugs. “I should have said something after you and Alec split, but I wanted to give you time. I know that break up wasn’t easy. I cared about you, and I still care about you, but now I have to care about you as a friend. Only a friend. It’s not easy to get over your feelings.”
“I know that. All too well.”
“So you’re with Logan now?”
I look up from my burger. “What makes you say that?”
“I saw you guys at the show Friday night.”
“We’re just taking things slow. Seeing how it goes.”
“He better treat you right this time.”
I smile at my friend. “Something tells me that everything is going to be different this time. I was unsure for a while, but any doubts I had are slowly vanishing. I believe he’s different from who he used to be. I think it’s the real Logan this time around.”
“I hope so. I’m happy for you, Wren. You know that’s all I want for you.”
“I know that Zachary, and you’re going to get yours too, you know. I don’t know how someone hasn’t snatched you up already.”
“I’m pretty picky,” he says with an impish grin.
My heart goes out to Zach. Beautiful, sexy, Zachary with the perfect body and titillate tattoos. He’s also going to make some girl very, very happy. I might even be a little jealous when that happens, but I think I’m going to be just fine with my Logan.
When I get home, I immediately call Logan and tell him about my lunch date with Zach. He’s not a jealous guy in the slightest, so I know it won’t be a big deal. He also knows how strongly I care for Zach and how much I long for his friendship again, even if it’s a different kind of friendship.
“That’s great. I told you he’d come around.”
“They always do,” I tease.
“Exactly. So what are we going to do this weekend? Did you want to come over and hang out with me? Or I could go over there?”
“Your place sounds perfect.”
*****
I watch Logan as he cooks me dinner in his kitchen. I can’t get over how sexy he is. He’s been so patient, and his manners are flawless. If I thought what we had
before felt real, it’s nothing compared to what I feel with him at this moment.
I smile at his back just as he turns and looks at me.
“Checking out my ass?”
I laugh so hard I almost snort. “No, I was not. Cocky much?”
“When you have an ass like mine, yeah.”
“You just keep cooking.”
He smiles and turns back around. “Are you going to stay with me again tonight?”
“I do believe so.”
He spins around. “You mean I don’t have to beg this time?”
“Nope. I even packed some pajamas and extra clothes just in case.”
“You’re quite confident, aren’t you?”
“It breaks my heart to see you on your hands and knees begging.”
“You’re hilarious,” he states, sarcastically. “You know, you could always leave some of your things here.”
“Why? Are you going to give me a
drawer?” I ask, laughing. Logan isn’t laughing. I stop. “You want to give me a drawer?”
“Why not?”
“I was kidding. That’s kind of a big deal, isn’t it?”
“So are we. Aren’t we?”
Touché. “I suppose we’re getting there. I’ll think about leaving some of my stuff here. Okay?”
“I’m happy to hear it.” He smiles and comes over to kiss me.
After dinner, we curl up on the couch under a blanket, eating ice cream. I’m shivering, but it tastes so good I can’t stop.
“You’re beautiful. I just want you to know that,” he says.
My spoon drops into my near empty bowl. It’s been a long time since anyone’s told me that. My eyes move to his. “Thank you.” Heat rushes to my cheeks.
“I mean it. I should have told you that when I first met you. I thought it the very first time I saw you. I was playing pool with Jack, and I watched you walk in
to the bar. You didn’t even seem to notice me. Not until I actually approached you later that night.”
“I wasn’t really looking for anything back then.”
“What about now?”
I put my head down and think before I speak. Now is as good as time as any to let him know. I look back up. “Honestly, Logan, I do think I’ve found what I’ve always been looking for.”
“You mean it?” Hope reaches his eyes.
“I do. Thank you for being so patient with me. I don’t mean to lead you on at all, but I had to make sure you were for real this time.”
“So you believe me? You believe me when I say that you are it for me?”
“I believe you.” I smile.
He smiles at me and leans in to give me a soft kiss on my cold lips. He looks at me, his face only an inch away from mine. “So we’re on the same page about what we want?” he asks.
“I’m all yours if that’s what you’re asking.”
“I think you have it backwards. It’s me who is all yours.”
He pulls me to him, kissing me, and I return it eagerly. I wrap my arms around him and straddle his lap, kissing him until he picks me up and brings me into his bedroom. Placing me gently on his bed, he crawls on top of me and kisses me like he hasn’t kissed me for seven long months.
We make love.
We make up.
We forgive each other.
And we make love again.
Tears of joy roll down my temples and into my hair as I grasp on to him. I never want to let go.
***
**
After we are fed and showered, he leads me back into his bedroom. I sit down and watch him as he chooses one of his acoustic guitars and joins me on the bed. He takes his time tuning it before he starts playing my favorite song, then continues playing all my favorite songs for me as I throw out requests.
I place my head on his lap near the guitar and look up at him, watching him play and listening to him sing for me. He does both with such passion. I love listening to his voice and think how I could do this every day for the rest of my life.
After he sets his guitar to the side, he looks down on me and smiles, then kisses me on the tip of my nose. He takes his calloused fingertips and gently puts them into my still dampened hair, caressing my scalp and running his fingers all the way through to the ends.
I close my eyes, enjoying the best feeling of having a man play with my hair. My man.
I open my eyes and look into his beautiful blue ones, and I smile.
“I love you, Wren,” he says.
My eyes widen in surprise as my heart leaps into my throat. I didn’t see that coming.