You're Always in the Last Place You Look (19 page)

“You know, I thought I’d never have to go through this.” He sighed.

“Me neither, actually.”

I watched him, while he scrutinized the school. Finally, he held out his hand, and I took hold. At least if we were about to expose ourselves to the whole student body, we had each other.

“So am I a good kisser?”

He laughed but didn’t answer.

 

Chapter Twenty-Two

 

As we walked across the sports field it became evident we were not alone in this. Gary, Tye, and Lily were lounging on the steps that headed to the main building. They all stood when they caught sight of us.

Zane’s eyes narrowed as we approached. “How bad is it?”

Gary shook his head, Tye shrugged, and Lily wrinkled her nose.

Tye hooked my neck. “Other than the gossip roaches scurrying around making sure the whole student body knows, not bad. There are a few girls though...”

Lily made an unladylike noise. “Yeah, they’re rampaging over the fact you picked a guy over them. As if you’re some kind of catch or something, and they actually had a chance!” Another snort.

I wasn’t really sure how to take that.

Lily’s eyes widened, and she turned to walk backwards in front of me. “Oh shit. Sorry, that came out wrong. I just meant they wouldn’t have a chance because, you know, you’re gay. Not that you’re not a catch. Well, not for me but—”

Tye yanked her next to him. “Quit before you bury yourself anymore than you already have.”

Looking over at me, Zane asked, “Are you cold?”

I shook my head, aware I was trembling, and humiliated Zane had felt it. I hadn’t been this anxious at the church yesterday, and I couldn’t figure out what the difference was. He stopped me right at the door, and leaned his forehead against mine.

“I don’t know if I can do this,” I whispered.

“Would it help if I told you I’m scared too?”

I let out a nervous chuckle. “No. You’re supposed to be the badass gay boy from the city, remember?”

He smiled. “Yeah, well, you of all people know that’s a myth. About the badass part I mean, and only a few people knew I was gay, so we’re together in this.”

With that I realized I had been the one to out him. “I’m sorry—”

“I’m not!” He lifted his head, and gazed at me with his deep blue eyes. “When I came here, I never expected to meet anyone. Then there you were in all your cowboy cuteness, so sweet and sensitive and giving—unlike anyone I’d ever met. And despite how I looked or behaved, you saw me for who I am.”

“And you saw me.” I gave him what I hoped was a flirty smile. “But you left out sexy.”

He bit his lip, shifting on his feet as his cheeks rosed. “Yeah, and maybe vain should be added to that list too.”

I leaned in. “Mmm, maybe...” I smiled against his lips, and felt my body straining, wanting to be closer. God, if he kept saying things like that, how was I going to keep from falling for him? I wished God did talk to me, because I really needed an answer to that one.

“All right, lovebirds. First bell’s going to ring, and I still need to go to my locker.” Tye said, succeeding in bringing me back to the here and now, and breaking us apart.

Passing around a sheepish look, I said, “Sorry.” But the echoing grins hovering told me nobody minded the delay.

What was the worst that could happen? Some name calling, maybe a threat or two, shoving, possible violence, but I doubted the last part considering who my father was. In this instance being a pastor’s son might offer some protection, since my dad knew most of these kids and their parents.

We walked through the doors, less bold than I had planned. As heads rotated, and eyes examined, I felt the judgment begin. It didn’t help that the halls were full, and we had to keep jostling around students working in a few more minutes of face time with friends before heading off to their classes. Why they had to stand in the middle of the halls was beyond me.

It also didn’t help that Gary was working like the linebacker he was, bumping into what seemed like everyone he passed. If he hadn’t been in front, half the students probably wouldn’t have even noticed us. But they did, and eyebrows raised, a few mouths dropped open, and friend poked friend, all while a steady stream of hissing whispers took place around us. I wasn’t sure if I chose not to listen, or if my mind, in a state of defense, decided to blur it all together. Either way, everything was a blissful monotone with no real distinction.

“Mr. Simmons! Mr. Zimmerman!” Okay, I heard that. Zane made a growly noise as we turned to face Vice Principal Tuttle just as he barked out our names again.

“Sir?” I queried the short, paunchy man in the ill-fitting, if impeccable, grey suit. I had never had the
pleasure
of talking with him in the four years here. But whether you had ever
talked
with him or not, we all knew his booming voice and stern face.

“This,” he gestured to our hands, and in response Zane laced his fingers between mine, “is not acceptable.”

“Excuse me?” Zane asked, acting as if he didn’t understand. However his grip said otherwise.

“This school does not condone this type of behavior.” Mr. Tuttle crossed his arms over his chest. My grip loosened, Zane’s tightened.

I sensed rather than saw them. Well, Gary overshadowed everyone, but the warmth of Tye, and the sweet baby powdery scent of Lily wafted over me. I shifted under the scrutiny of Mr. Tuttle as Tye huddled my back tight enough I hoped that was his phone pressed against my left butt-cheek.

“So, you’re saying hand holding is no longer permissible in school?” Tye asked. I glanced over at Zane’s defiant face, and noticed Gary’s head whipping around as if he was looking for something. He caught my eye and winked at me. The devious look on his face made me nervous.

The V.P. opened his mouth just as Gary interjected. “You don’t condone something as innocent as holding hands, but you allow this?” With that Gary spun Zane, and kissed him. He
kissed
my boyfriend!

“And this...” Tye’s arms wrapped my waist, holding me back against him. Lily, not one to be left out, practically mounted my leg, plastering herself against me as she gyrated her hips and, ah, yeah, wrong parts. I shoved her off me as the first bell rang.

“What are you doing?”

Hands landing on her hips, she glared at me. “Trying to make a point.”

“I think it’s been made just fine,” I grumbled just as Gary released a surprised Zane. I seethed despite Tye still being draped around me. The fact I hadn’t shoved him off, as I had Lily, didn’t escape me. But I was too ticked off right now to put any thought to that.

Gary blushed.

Zane shoved his chest while wiping his own mouth, then exclaimed, “Dude!”

Through the cheers, hoots, clapping, and odd comment over who was actually gay and who wasn’t, Gary, usually so soft spoken, ignored Zane and belted, “Yo!” subduing the cacophony. “Mr. Tuttle is telling us the school no longer allows hand holding. Can you believe it? Yet, based on what I witnessed only moments ago—you all know what I’m talkin’ about—they seem to still allow every other kind of touching. How messed up is that!?”

Another round of chaos just as the second bell rang. It was impossible to discern whether the crowd was for or against what they had just witnessed. But I supposed “giving it to the man” was enough to sway everyone slightly in our favor.


Enough
!” Mr. Tuttle clenched his teeth and appeared to be counting us off, “You five to the main office, now!” Panting a few times, his black eyes roamed over the crowd gathered behind us. “The rest of you, get to class.”

Lily glanced at my crotch, then shrugged. “Nice to know I was right about that.”

It appeared Zane was too busy glaring at me to comment, otherwise I was sure he would have been all over Lily’s observation.

As Tye released me, he said in a low voice, “We’re in trouble now.”

“Hey, maybe we’ll be famous. You know, years from now...” Lily prattled on while I returned Zane’s jealous glare, and we all followed a stolid Mr. Tuttle.

“At least I didn’t kiss him,” I said.

“I didn’t kiss him, he kissed me!”

“You did a little,” Gary offered, waving away Zane’s scowl. “Just saying...”

Lily’s monologue halted in mid-word, her mouth abandoned, and left hanging askew like a broken door.

But, before she could respond Tye beat her to the punch. “You kissed him back?” Tye asked incredulously, then shook his head. “
Dude
...”

“I did
not
kiss him back! I was trying to get his God damn tongue out of my mouth.”

That stopped me in my tracks, which in turn halted Zane, his expression sour, and informing me he hadn’t enjoyed any part of the experience. Good. Because if he had, I wasn’t sure how I would have taken that. Gary looked away, gave a small shrug, and narrowly avoided mowing down Mr. Tuttle as the man whirled around to face us.

“Quiet! If I hear one more word I will personally reinstate detention.”

Everyone’s lips sealed, and we all nodded. However by the time we reached the office I was once again ticked. That Gary had kissed my boyfriend was one thing, and I could almost accept it in the scheme of it all—but tongue?
What the fuck was his tongue doing in Zane’s mouth
?
And what the fuck made him think that was okay
? All I could see was that kiss, surrounded by a multitude of F-words, all of it swirling around in my head, a kaleidoscope of lips and letters. I forced myself to take a deep breath as we entered the main office.

The Vice Principal gestured to three chairs before closing himself into a small windowless office that looked about as spacious as a walk-in closet.

“Who’s sitting on whose lap?” Tye asked, leering at Lily. She giggled back.

As if playing musical chairs, I sat quickly, yanking Zane down into the chair next to me. I wasn’t ready to forgive quite yet, but I wasn’t about to leave him standing alone either. Tye gave Lily the last chair. And who said chivalry was dead? Without warning, Gary hunkered in front of me, his knees cracking.

He ran a large hand through his cropped, dark blond hair. “Dude, I’m so sorry. I just...I got caught up in the moment, and, well, he’s, you know—and I...” his forehead bonked my knees as he let out a wobbly breath. “I’ve only ever been with Gavin...” he wailed.

Tye crouched down, and started rubbing the big guy’s back. “Gavin’s seeing someone else. He found out Friday via text, if you can believe that. Asshole didn’t even have the decency to call him.” He gave me a meek cringe. “I’m not saying what he did was right, but maybe you could forgive him this once?”

I deflated somewhat. “I’m sorry, Gary.”

“Me too.” His head rocked. “I mean for kissing Zane like that.” He sniffed hard, and I made a face, hoping he wasn’t slobbering too much on my jeans. “He’s a really good kisser...” he added quietly.

Looking over, I hooked Zane’s neck. “Yeah, I know.” Zane wilted against me, relieved, and smirked timidly back. Gary shifted back onto his heels, and I added, “But so help me, if I ever catch you trying to kiss him again...” I left the threat hanging when my father walked into the office. Jesus, that was fast. With Gary and Tye still squatting at my feet, I stood, preparing to explain or apologize or something.

He pointed at me, and commanded, “Sit.” I’d seen him mad before, but the veins standing out along his neck told me he was downright livid. I sat, forgetting how to breathe as he walked right into the Vice Principal’s office without being announced, or even knocking.

Tye looked at me, his eyes wide. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen him so pissed.” Then he shot to his feet, clutching his head, and groaned. “Oh man, Tuttle called our parent’s! My dad’s going to kill me.”

“My mom’s going to be crowing over this. I stood up for something I believed in, and she’s going to be ecstatically bouncing off the walls for weeks. Maybe I’m more like her than I thought.” Lily’s smile was pretentious, but not overly so. Her mom had grown up in Los Angeles, fighting what she called the good fight, working to be heard in rallies and sit-ins for everyone and everything without a big enough voice. Framed newspaper clippings from almost every rally she had participated in adorned the walls of their home. And even now, she worked tirelessly for several non-profit organizations, none of which I knew anything about, despite her trying to get me interested every time I came over.

“You don’t think she’s going to be weird about it?” I didn’t know how much Lily might have told her family, but knowing Lily, they probably knew everything she did. I guess I just wanted to know where I stood with them now.

“She knows you’re—”

“Darling, I knew ages ago. I grew up in L.A. for goodness sake.” Mrs. Kell smiled broadly as she blew in, setting her white rimmed sunglasses atop her red hair. She gave Lily a voracious hug. “I’m so proud of you!” She shook her head, waving her hand as she turned to us. “It’s an outrage, I tell you. This would never have happened in California.”

Her eyes narrowed down at me, and I bolted to my feet, tugging Zane’s leather sleeve in the process. I offered her an apologetic smile. She believed men should stand when a woman entered the room. Zane got the gist and followed suit, even though he eyed her gaudy polyester dress, probably wondering if she was for real since she looked like she had just stepped from a bad 70’s sitcom. She always dressed like that though, and I figured she was either reliving her youth, or she just never left it. My guess was the latter. 

“Gabriel, tell me you’re not dating Gary?” The way she said it, as if the idea were preposterous, caused both Zane and I to chuckle. “Nothing against you, dear.” Mrs. Kell patted Gary’s arm. “I just don’t see you as being Gabriel’s type.”

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