A Blessing for Miriam (11 page)

Wayne had gone along for the trip into Coalgate to see her off. His smile had been warm as usual. Miriam even got the impression he wanted to sneak around the corner for a quick goodbye kiss. That hadn’t been possible with Aunt Fannie and Mr. Whitehorse along. But the thought had warmed her heart for the past two days on the bus. The glow had lingered until she’d reached Ohio. It had dimmed in the past few hours.

Possum Valley was northwest of the bus stop, and the vicinity brought back memories of Ivan and Laura. Laura was Laura Mast now, and Miriam had no regrets about that. The memories were
the problem. If one man—Ivan—had rejected her, why couldn’t it happen again? This time with Wayne and Laura’s sister, Esther?

Miriam sighed. It was tragic that Shirley was in this accident, but perhaps some
gut
could come out of it. Maybe Shirley would learn to live a more godly life. And for good measure, maybe Miriam would deal with some of her memories of Ivan before her wedding in October. What an embarrassment it would be if she brought Wayne to Possum Valley to marry and all she could do was think about her past—and Ivan.

Miriam peered through the window as the bus cruised through downtown New Philadelphia. Moments later it lurched to a stop. Right away Miriam caught sight of
Mamm
standing by herself beside the car of their neighbor, Mrs. Faulkner. Her family didn’t hire
Englisha
drivers unless they had to.
Daett
had strict convictions about such things, although Mrs. Faulkner was glad to help out when she could. Miriam grabbed her carry-on and joined two other passengers in the aisle as they made their way slowly off the vehicle. The bus driver waited at the bottom of the steps and then led them to the outside luggage compartment. Miriam paused to send a quick wave and smile toward
Mamm
.

Mamm
’s face stayed sober as she waved back.

Miriam retrieved her large suitcase and headed across the parking lot.

Ahead of her,
Mamm
opened her arms for a long hug and whispered, “Welcome home. It’s so
gut
to see you again.”

“And you too.” Miriam held on to
Mamm
for a long moment.

“Welcome back to Possum Valley!” Mrs. Faulkner’s cheerful voice greeted her from the driver’s seat.

“It’s
gut
to be back.” Miriam tried to sound equally cheerful. She whispered to
Mamm
, “How is Shirley?”

“We’ll talk about that later.”
Mamm
motioned toward the car’s trunk. “We have to get back. I helped Naomi prepare lunch for the
men before I left, but baby Anna’s been fussy all day. The schoolchildren will be home soon too.”

“Shirley’s home then?” Miriam guessed as she lifted her suitcase into the trunk that Mrs. Faulkner had popped open from the driver’s seat.

“
Yah
, they let people go early nowadays.”

After stowing her luggage, Miriam and her mother got into the backseat, shut the doors, and buckled up.

“I’m awfully sorry to hear about your sister,” Mrs. Faulkner said, as she guided the car out into the street.

“So how is Shirley?” Miriam tried again.

Mamm
looked out the window. “Shirley’s more troubled than anything. Health-wise she’ll be fine.”

“Accidents can be so traumatic,” Mrs. Faulkner offered in sympathy.

They rode in silence out of New Philadelphia and through the town of Dover. Miriam glanced over at
Mamm.
She knew Mrs. Faulkner was used to quiet Amish people, but the truth was that under normal circumstances there would be plenty of conversation going on right now. There was her wedding, and Wayne, and Shirley’s true condition to speak of, all of which
Mamm
apparently preferred to discuss in private.

“Did you have a
gut
trip?”
Mamm
finally asked as Mrs. Faulkner drove up Highway 39 toward Sugarcreek.

Miriam smiled. “It was okay—as far as Greyhound travel goes, I guess.”

“Glad it was you and not me,” Mrs. Faulkner put in. “I don’t like buses. They smell funny.”

Miriam gave a small laugh. She said to
Mamm
, “Aunt Fannie and Uncle William send their greetings. And Wayne does to. He saw me off at the bus station in Coalgate.”

A trace of a smile played on
Mamm
’s face. “He sounds decent
enough, but then we wouldn’t expect anything else from someone you like.”

“Oh, my!” Mrs. Faulkner exclaimed. “Do I hear that special note in someone’s voice?”

Miriam’s heart warmed as she answered. “
Yah!
I’ve been seeing Wayne Yutzy for some time.”

“That’s wonderful!” Mrs. Faulkner hadn’t lost her enthusiasm. “Any wedding plans in the air yet?”

Miriam chuckled, and Mrs. Faulkner joined in. She knew the Amish habit of secrecy when it came to weddings.

“Well, distance makes the heart grow fonder,” Mrs. Faulkner said. “At least that’s what they say. So this Wayne fellow will be all the happier to see you when you return.”

Miriam smiled. “I sure hope he will be.”

Mrs. Faulkner continued. “Your sister will be just fine. I heard that Beachy boy has seen to it that she has the best doctors. And you know the Beachys have plenty of money, so everything will be the best it can be.” Mrs. Faulkner slowed down to pull into the Yoder driveway. “I have it from one of the first responders. The Beachy boy called his dad from the crash site, and they told the ambulance where to take your sister. Nothing but the best for those Beachys.”

Miriam glanced at
Mamm
. “Is this true?”

Mamm
shrugged her shoulders. “I wouldn’t know.
Daett
did say all the hospital bills have been paid by someone.”

Mrs. Faulkner continued undaunted. “Our children often do the strangest things, even the best of them, so don’t feel too badly.” She came to a stop beside the Yoder house.

“I suppose so.”
Mamm
smiled tiredly. “What do I owe you?”

“Just the usual.” Mrs. Faulkner fluttered her hand about. “You know I’m always glad to help your family.”

“Thanks for the ride,” Miriam told Mrs. Faulkner while
Mamm
wrote out a check. Miriam got out and retrieved her suitcases. She waited at the end of the walk for
Mamm
. The sights and smells
of home washed over her—the old barn with its sagging windows, the white house under the trees where she’d been born and grown up, the wafting scents of plants and animals. All of it seemed unchanged since last July. She was the one who had changed, and in ways she couldn’t put her finger on.

She looked around again. She would bring Wayne here before too many months had passed, and they would say the vows in this house.

After Mrs. Faulkner pulled out of the driveway,
Mamm
joined Miriam.

“So much has changed since I left, and yet nothing really has,” Miriam said. “I can’t get my mind around it.”

“You’ve grown up,”
Mamm
allowed, but she was obviously distracted. “Come, Miriam. You must see Shirley now. She needs your encouragement.”

Miriam followed
Mamm
toward the house. She knew she must be strong even though she felt weak inside. Shirley had left Oklahoma last fall when she should have stayed where the Lord had put her to work on her problems. Here in Possum Valley, she’d managed to make things worse for herself. But none of that was what Shirley would want to hear right now. Miriam decided she needed to offer Shirley the same compassion she’d received. Had not the Lord sent her Wayne’s attention when she hadn’t deserved it?

Miriam took the front steps with care. Under normal conditions, Naomi and Shirley would both be out on the porch by now, but the front door hadn’t even opened.

Miriam was held back by
Mamm
’s hand. “Don’t act shocked when you see her. Remember, her face is covered in bandages. ”

Miriam nodded.

They both walked up the porch steps together. They entered the home, and Naomi peered out of the kitchen doorway with baby Anna in her arms.

“Hi!” Naomi gave Miriam a little wave.

Miriam wanted to rush over for her first peek at her new baby sister, but she quickly noticed Shirley lying on the couch in the living room. Bandages covered most of her face, and there was a look of dismay in her eyes. Miriam hurried to her side and knelt, taking her hand.

Shirley jerked her hand back. “I’m not a little
bobbli
you need to fuss over.”

“You don’t have to snap at her,”
Mamm
protested. “Miriam’s come all the way from Oklahoma to see you.”

I wish she hadn’t
, Shirley’s hardened eyes said, though Miriam noticed they almost brimmed with tears at the same time.

“I’m so very sorry about the accident.” Miriam took Shirley’s hand again, and this time her younger sister didn’t pull away.

“So am I.” Shirley’s voice was bitter. “I’ll have scars across my face for the rest of my life.”

“You can be thankful you have life at all.”
Mamm
’s voice was clipped. “And your attitude is disgraceful, Shirley. A
gut-
natured woman is what the Lord values. How your face looks doesn’t matter at all.”

“That’s not true from where I sit,” Shirley protested.

Mamm
let the comment go.

“We understand.” Miriam stroked Shirley’s hand. “And
Mamm
also understands. But maybe things aren’t as bad as you think.”

“Sure they are,” Shirley complained. “I know that scars are scars, and the best doctors can do is make them less obvious. That’s what they said, Miriam. From now on I’ll always be the ‘Shirley who was in a car accident on her
rumspringa
and made ugly.’ Jonas is gone too. He won’t want to see me when I’m like this.”

That’s a
gut
thing, Miriam thought, but she kept it to herself.

Mamm
grimaced and disappeared into the kitchen. Naomi also vanished with baby Anna. Clearly Shirley had gotten on both of their nerves since she’d arrived home from the hospital, and Miriam could see why.

“You really must get yourself together,” Miriam tried to keep her voice soft. “Look at the blessings we do have…like a new sister in the house.”

Shirley’s tears trickled down her cheeks. “That’s easy for you to say. And what’s a baby but another mouth to feed, which we can’t afford? All the while, you seem to get blessings dropped on your head all day long. You get a farm from Mr. Bland. We go visit Oklahoma, and everyone loves you. The perfect man snaps you right up. Of course you’ve got nothing to complain about.
I’m
the one who can’t do anything right. Look at me!” Shirley waved her hand across her face. “Miss Scarface. That’s what I’ll be. No man worth his salt will ever love me.”

“The Lord will lead you as always,” Miriam ventured.

Shirley wasn’t convinced. “At least you came home to see me. That’s nice.”

“I wanted to.” Miriam’s voice caught. She had to tell the whole truth. “And while I’m here, I hope to plan my wedding for October. Maybe you can help?”

Shirley hesitated. “I heard about the wedding. And I’m glad you came for some reason besides me. I’ve never been worth much anyway. I can’t keep even one of my
gut
intentions or promises. I’m a failure. At least now I’ll look it.”

“Don’t say that!” Miriam pulled Shirley into a tight hug. “You’re not a failure. God loves you, and I love you.”

Shirley didn’t resist, and she clung to Miriam for a long time.

Chapter Twelve

M
iriam had been home for a week, trying her best to bring Shirley out of her doldrums to no avail. That was painfully obvious as
Daett
finished the Sunday morning prayers, and Shirley fled upstairs. Miriam had suspected Shirley wouldn’t want to go with the family to the church service, but she hadn’t expected the moment to be quite this dramatic.

Daett
’s lips were set in a straight line. “That girl!” But he said nothing more, and
Mamm
made no move to follow Shirley up the stairs. They had decided to leave things be for the moment. Shirley would survive on her own for the day.
Daett
wasn’t about to dignify Shirley’s behavior by allowing one of the family to stay home with her.