Winston and Brandon looked at each other.
“I remember a little,” Nicholas said.
“Dude, that was some blow to the head.”
“How did I get it?”
“How do you think? Sydney socked you with a vase.”
“Really? So that’s the real story behind this scar.” Nicholas shook his head. “I’m not even sure that’s the main the reason I lost my memories about it. Hell, I wish I could do it again right now—who’d want to remember this?” He gave a dry laugh. “I think I traumatized myself into amnesia.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Brandon said, looking disgusted. “Anyway aren’t you worried?About Winston talking? I mean they’ve got him for Sarah—who’s to say he won’t find it funny to tell on us?”
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
Edward heard a light knock and looked up from his book, as if he would be able to see who was on the other side.
“Come in,” he said, and the door opened, its frame filled by the slightly aged, slim man whose kindly eyes had always looked out for him. Samuel had been with them for as long as he could remember.
“Sir, may I speak to you for a moment?” Samuel said in his proper British accent.
“Sammy! Why so formal?” Eddie said, beckoning him deeper into the room.
Edward noticed the lines around Sam’s light eyes, more crinkled than ever, worry making his face longer than usual.
“What is it?” he asked.
“Sir, you must forgive me, I couldn’t help but hear it. And I wrestled with myself as to whether or not to mention it, but I think you should know. Oh, but I do worry how you will react...”
Edward found himself getting worried. It certainly wasn’t like Sam to dance around like this. “Sam just give it to me straight—what’s got you so worried?”
Sam took a deep breath.
“Well, first of all, I was there when it happened. That lady—Maria—she slugged that awful boy as soon as she was close enough. Oh, if only she had kicked him in his middle...”
Edward nearly laughed but given the gravity of the rendition, he held back, knowing he wasn’t going to like whatever was coming next.
Sam sighed again.
“I overheard the ladies talking later that night. I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, I can promise you that...” Edward couldn’t stop a smile from escaping then since all their servants did was eavesdrop. Sam continued: “...I just happened to hear them as I was...checking the sprinklers. And I heard Maria say that...” Samuel looked at Edward, faltering once more, appearing to reconsider his decision but it was too late to turn back. There was no way Edward would let him get away now.
Edward stared at him until he squeezed out the rest.
“She said that he...he raped her sir,” Samuel said in almost a whisper.
Edward felt his blood rushing as his body came alive, his heart beating even harder. He realized his hands had tightened into fists only when he felt his fingernails had made dents in his palms.
“Sammy, are you sure you heard correctly?” he asked.
His voice sounded different even to his own ears.
Sam’s eyes had a different type of worry in them now.
“Oh I knew I shouldn’t have told you sir, look at your eyes...I could tell you felt for the girl even if you were trying to fool yourself...” Sam took a deep breath. “Please don’t do anything sir, nothing that would bring trouble.”
But Edward scarcely heard him. He was too busy trying to figure out how best to break Brandon’s legs and have it not traced to him.
“There’s more sir.”
Sam’s words filtered their way to Edward’s consciousness, gripping his attention. He didn’t want to hear the rest but at the same time, needed to, more than he needed to avoid it.
“I don’t suppose this is something I want to know.”
“You don’t sir, but I think you should help him.”
Edward was confused.
“Who?”
“Your brother sir. You see, he was involved...Sir no! Stay! Not involved in raping that Maria girl, please let me tell you the rest. But promise me you’ll help him. He is confused, he is angry, and he is hurt. He is crushed really, you must help him through this. He’s got no one else...”
“Sammy.” Edward’s tone warned him to continue.
Sam sighed.
“He...I’m afraid he might have done something similar to his girlfriend some years ago—Sydney. I heard him as I was passing his door talking to that Brandon fellow. When he was hanging out with those awful boys, it sounded like they made him...”
“No one can
make
you do something like that Sammy.”
“Sir please! You must not be so quick to judge him. I don’t believe it’s all clear yet.”
“That’s enough Sammy,” Edward said over his shoulder as he walked past a frightened-looking Samuel to exit his room. “I’ll deal with this as I see fit.”
It took him a while to find Nicholas and in that time, he had calmed down enough not to punch his brother as soon as he saw him.
Nicholas must have caught the scent of his fury because his eyes glazed over in fear.
“You know,” he said.
“Know what Nicholas? About you and your sick friends?”
“God, Eddie—I didn’t know, I swear! I didn’t remember—still don’t! I don’t want to remember doing that to her, and I’m still not sure I did.”
“You expect me to believe that?”
“Think about it Eddie. Knowing everything that’s gone down, you think things would have gone as they have? That I would deliberately seek out a girl I...I violated to date? How cruel do you think I am? Do you think I made up those dreams I told you about? I simply don’t remember any of this!”
Edward felt his anger and disgust slowly being tempered by confusion.
Then Nicholas increased his confusion tenfold.
“What about you?” Nicholas demanded angrily. “You’re just as bad as us.”
“What the fuck are you talking about man? I never raped anyone...”
“Might as well have. You make girls feel like shit too. At least the ones I was with—they knew what they were getting into. But you deliberately pick the weak ones who end up falling for you or feeling like they’re your girlfriend. Then they feel like total shit when they realize you played them. How’s that with screwing with someone, huh? You think they don’t feel violated?”
Edward laughed.
“I can’t believe you just tried to compare the two. You must
really
be insane.”
The thought had crossed Edward’s mind before, but he now wondered if his brother was truly certifiable.
Nicholas stood there looking pained, breathing hard but silent.
“How could I have done that Eddie? What would make me do that? What the fuck was I thinking?” He shook his head. “I keep going back and forth about it—on one hand, I really don’t want to remember. On the other, I seriously want to know what was going through my head. I’m not a monster Eddie, I don’t understand this at all.”
Edward watched him closely in silence for a few seconds, then shrugged and averted his eyes. He felt a need to comfort him a little.
“You were pretty questionable in those days Nicholas. Bad company I guess. Winston and...” Edward felt his mouth twisting as he spat out the next word: “Brandon were clearly not the best influences.”
Nicholas half-laughed.
“Like you said, I don’t think that excuses me...”
“I never said it did. But it sure played a part, don’t you think? I mean, if you never got involved with guys like that, the thought would never have crossed your mind, and you wouldn’t have had the pressure to act on it, even if by some weird chance you had thought of it. Which I’m sure you wouldn’t have.”
“Yeah, you’re right,” Nicholas said. Edward could tell he was latching onto it. “If only...”
“No, Nicholas, blame isn’t on them. Why did you agree to it?”
“I don’t know.”
Edward felt a pang of pity at Nicholas’s tone, growing with the tortured expression on his face. Nicholas ran his hand through his hair.
“I don’t know. I wish I could remember...”
Then it seemed a thought struck him as he straightened up a bit, looking more alert.
“Oh my god.”
He looked at Edward, but it seemed he wasn’t really seeing him.
“Nicholas what is it? Jesus Christ you’re freaking me out!”
“She does know,” he said.
“Who, Sydney?” Edward asked.
“I was wondering about it before, but I’m almost positive...But what if she doesn’t? Should I tell her? But she must know—she was asking me these questions earlier...Oh god, what am I going to do? What’s going to happen to us? She’s gonna hate me.
I
hate me! Why is everything so wrong? She...she was the only thing that was right...”
Edward pretended not to see his brother’s eyes glistening.
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
As Sydney pulled on her other shoe, Maria stood by her bedroom door, arms folded.
“Sydney, I swear you’ve lost your mind. I don’t know how you expect to avoid him when it’s his sister’s birthday.”
“I’m relying on the fact that a lot of people will be there and hoping I’m I’ll get lost in the crowd.”
Maria laughed.
“You? Lost in a crowd of blondes? I highly doubt that.” She paused. “Hey, maybe that’s what this is all about and you’re just pretending you feel so compelled by your promise to her. Yeah, come to think of it, I call total bullshit. I know you’re a stickler for promises and all, but methinks she’s a reasonable girl; I think she’d understand you not being able to make it. After all, it’s not like you’re best friends or anything.”
Sydney remained quiet. Then she said, her voice barely above a whisper:
“And what if I am? Going to see him I mean. I can’t avoid him forever.”
Maria looked away then. She sighed.
“I want to see Ed too. But are we ready to see them? That is the question.”
They found themselves pulling up behind a line of cars as they arrived at the mansion. Sydney felt herself warming up in self-consciousness about her car since in front of her were nothing but Mercedes, Rolls Royces, Ferraris, Vipers, Lamborghinis, and limousines.
“I feel like a pauper,” Maria said, echoing her thoughts.
Valets looking like mad penguins in their black and red suits took care of the traffic and Maria and Sydney, after producing two forms of ID and being checked off the list were led inside.
It didn’t take long for Sydney to spot Allison and point her out to Maria. Her hair was down and she was wearing a simple pink dress, golden earrings, and gold, strappy shoes with pink silky material woven in.
“Wow,” Maria was staring at Allison. “She’s gorgeous! No wonder Eddie’s standards are so high—he’s surrounded by beauty. In every sense of the word,” she added, looking around the decorated house and the food lining the kitchen, dining room and family room. The arrangements were beautiful—the fruit palettes, the
hor d’ oeuvres
—they almost looked too good to eat. Almost.
“Wait, is that what I think it is?” Maria asked, her eyes wide, staring. Sydney followed her eyes. “Seriously? A chocolate fountain? Sydney, I know we planned to stick together and everything, but I know you understand why you and I must part for...just a few moments while I acquaint myself with what will probably be the best chocolate I’ll ever have. Back soon, I promise.”
Sydney knew it was useless to try and stop her, and she didn’t feel like following her either.
She stood there and looked around at first, trying to stay alert and spot Nicholas before he could see her so she could avoid him efficiently, but the arrangements, the decorations, and the food, took her breath and attention away. As she was admiring a floral arrangement, she felt a tap on her shoulder and her heart caught in her throat.
She turned as if someone had pressed the slow motion button on her body.
She saw Allison’s bright blue eyes looking at her, a smile on her face.
“Hi!” Allison hugged her as best as she could with her tiny glass of pink champagne. “I’m so glad you made it! Oh my god—Nick’s gonna be so happy. I’ll let him know you’re here. He’s right in the kitchen.”
“Allison please don’t. I just came to wish you happy birthday since I promised you I’d come and all.”
Allison giggled.
“Yeah right. But if you don’t want me to mention it, fine. But you don’t stand much of a chance hiding here. Oh, try some of these,” she picked up something that looked like meatballs by the toothpick and handed it to her. “They’re delicious.” She popped one in her mouth then waved and fluttered off.
Sydney tasted the meatball and had to resist the urge to spit it out immediately. It wasn’t that it tasted awful—she was just expecting something else to hit her taste buds and what did was so different from her expectations, it jarred her.
She picked up a napkin from the table and emptied the contents of her mouth in it, stuffing the remainder of the meatball thing in her napkin.
Thanks but no thanks
, she thought.
But those strawberries sure look
...
“Sydney?”
Sydney’s hand stopped in mid-reach. She didn’t turn toward Nicholas’s voice but she did curse Allison, suspecting she was behind this.
“Go away,” she said, but she knew it was not audible enough for him to hear it.
“Sydney, can we talk?”
His voice was like the patter of soft rain.
“No,” she said a little louder, still not turning around.
She walked away, heading toward Maria who she found dipping banana pieces in the chocolate fountain.
“Can we get out of here now?” she asked her.
“Are you kidding me? I’m just getting started! Mmm...you should try this. I haven’t tried the white chocolate one yet, I wanna...”
“He’s here—he just snuck up on me.”
“Well forgive me if I’m not surprised. And you make it sound like he had his binoculars out looking for you.”
“Maybe. Who knows with a psycho like that?”
“He’s not a psycho and you know it.
“Says who? Anyway, come on. We came together, we leave together, so let’s go. Or are you waiting to check out Eddie’s girlfriends?”
“Girlfriends? That doesn’t sound like my Eddie.”
“Shows how much you know
your
Eddie.”
“No need to be cruel Sydney. Christ. Fine, let’s go. You’re such a party-pooper.”
“Why, look who’s here.”
They both turned.
Evelyn was smiling like the Cheshire cat.
She turned to Maria.
“Are you bringing the entertainment this evening? A boxing match perhaps?”
Then she turned to Sydney.
“Why Sydney, I haven’t seen you around much. I’ve missed you terribly.”
Sydney snuck a glance at Maria.
Evelyn swept her arm in the direction of the food.
“Help yourselves! Although I’m sure you have already. After all, who knows when next you’ll have the pleasure of such goodies. Oh, by the way, you don’t have to use your fingers. Toothpicks and plates are on the tables. And napkins.” She started to walk off, but spun around as if she had just remembered something.
“Oh and dears, do stay for a bit. I’ve got quite a treat for you all later on. It’ll be fun.”
Evelyn continued on her way.
Sydney and Maria looked at each other, curiosity overtaking them both.
“Curiosity killed the cat,” Sydney said.
“And satisfaction brought it back. I know you want to stay too, don’t look at me like that.”
“Okay, so all we have to do is avoid those guys for a bit. I think Nicholas will stay away for a while. I know him. He has to regroup and formulate some kind of plan—he’s not too good at spontaneity. I just hope the surprise doesn’t take too long.”
“Yeah. Me too,” Maria agreed, except she sounded kind of dreamy, sort of far away as she said it, and Sydney soon saw why.
Eddie had appeared with a blond by his side, a different one than she had seen before.
He walked up to Allison, hugged and kissed her on the cheek, then gave her a gift. Allison held it with one hand, shook hands with the blond with the other, then went off to put the gift in her gift circle. Eddie and the blond headed to the bar.
Maria sighed.
“As delicious as that woman’s surprise sounds, I would like to leave right now. This is so pathetic. I am so pathetic.”
Sydney wrapped her arm in Maria’s.
“There’s nothing pathetic about it. If anything, he’s the pathetic one.”
Sydney wanted to lead Maria off somewhere, but she didn’t know where to go.
She felt trapped—Eddie on one side of them, Nicholas on the other.
She decided to head outside but Maria didn’t cooperate until she could fill as many plates as she could hold with food.
Soon, everyone who was outside with them was being ushered back into the house for one of the final events. When they came back inside, they noticed that the culinary decor had changed a bit. There were now five tables set up with small items that were the same but of varying colors. As they got closer, they noticed that they looked like fortune cookies except, like fortune cookies that had fallen out of a rainbow: one pile, a deep satin ruby red, another, brilliant sapphire blue, and another, mint-green. The other one was tan, the other pink-lemonade colored.
“Your fortunes!” Evelyn said. “Wrapped up in cherry, blueberry, mint, cappuccino and strawberry. Enjoy!”
Maria didn’t need to be told twice. She headed for the cherry while Sydney picked up a pink one.
She could see Maria was excited.
Maria ate through to the fortune.
“Oh my god—that was
so
good,” Maria said, still chewing. Then she held up the strip of paper. “Okay it says: ‘You cannot eat your cake, and have your cake. Miguel de Cervantes.’” Her eyebrows furrowed. “Interesting. What does yours say?”
Sydney broke the cookie.
“You better not be planning to waste that beauty,” Maria said, staring at it. Sydney laughed and gave her half, then ate the other half. She made a mental note to grab a few more to take home with her once it kissed her tongue.
“Okay, mine says: ‘The mark of your ignorance is the depth of your belief in injustice and tragedy. What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the Master calls the butterfly.—Richard Bach.’ Even more interesting.”
Maria let out a deep breath.
“Well, that was fun and all, but I’m a bit disappointed. I expected fireworks of some sort.”
“I bet that other fortune cookie you palmed says: ‘be careful what you wish for—you just might get it,’” Sydney replied, noticing Eddie heading for them. Maria turned to look.
“Sydney, can you excuse us for a moment?” Eddie asked as he reached them.
Sydney looked at Maria.
Maria gave a slight nod indicating it was okay.
Sydney backed away but was unsure where to go. She felt vulnerable now, exposed. She was sure if Nicholas saw that she was alone, he would pounce, so she stayed close, yet out of earshot of Eddie and Maria, trying to occupy herself with some of the snacks.
She decided she wanted to try the cappuccino fortune cookie and grabbed one.
“You can’t run forever you know.”
Even now his voice still managed to climb her spine. She had to resist the urge to close her eyes and savor the feeling.
“Only till I no longer have legs,” she replied, not wanting to look at him.
“Sydney look at me please.”
Sydney knew it wasn’t a good idea but she turned slowly and looked up, knowing she would regret complying to his request.
Love washed over her heart like a massaging shower. She found herself wanting to put her arms around him and just hold him close, inhale his scent, savor the feeling of him next to her.
She looked away, not wanting to reveal her thoughts in her eyes.
“Sydney, please give me a chance. Let me talk to you. We need to talk things out—you can’t leave us like this!”
“Wanna bet?”
She turned to walk away.
Nicholas grabbed her by the arm.
“Please,” he said. “Come upstairs with me. Let’s talk.”
Sydney tried to pull her arm away forcefully, but her body wouldn’t listen.
She looked up at him. Then she looked around. They had caught the attention of several people.
She relented, her shoulders sagging.
“Okay. But not upstairs.”
Her heart had leapt unexpectedly at his words so she didn’t trust herself with him. Nor him with her for that matter.
“Okay, well we’ll go to...you name it. Wherever you’re comfortable.”
Sydney thought about it. The first floor was full of young adults and probably the guest rooms, leaving Nicholas’s room on the third floor and one room on the second floor.
“The cat room.”
Nicholas laughed despite the situation.
“All right, your wish is my command.”
They headed to the second floor.
When Nicholas opened the door to Glacier’s room his mouth dropped open.
Sydney looked to see what took him by surprise.
She saw Mrs. Dhalton hurriedly hopping off the knee of a familiar servant, the young one who had been introduced as Jeremy.
“Mom?” Nicholas said, still watching his mother in shock.
“Oh.” She was wiping her mouth. “Nicholas! How are you doing dear? Sydney, hello. I’m glad you stuck around—I knew Nicholas wanted to see you.”
Nicholas stared at the young man whose lips his mother’s had been entwined with, then laughed. Sydney wasn’t sure if he meant it.
“I guess now I finally understand Jeremy’s purpose; I should have known. I guess the question is: so this is who you’re doing?”
“Oh, don’t be silly.” Evelyn was smoothing her hair. “Jeremy was just...well, you know. Oh grow up. He’s the handyman.”
“Yeah, I bet. I can’t believe this.”
Sydney still couldn’t figure out how Nicholas felt about the situation. His words said one thing, but something in his voice said another. It was almost as if he was happy he had caught her in such a position.
“Nicholas don’t be so naive. When last do you think your father and I were in such a position? Do you think he doesn’t have assistants in the same positions? For the same purposes?”
“So two wrongs make a right?”
“I never said that dear. Frankly, I don’t see the wrong besides me being married to your father.”
Completely composed, Evelyn walked out, head held high. Jeremy followed, shrugging, an apologetic yet smug smile on his face.
Evelyn turned once more before going out of sight.
“By the way, didn’t you see the ‘Do Not Enter’ sign?”
“Haven’t you heard of locking?” he said quietly, after she had already gone.
Nicholas stood there for a few seconds as if still processing what he had just seen.
“I feel weird about being in here now,” he said with an empty smile. “Like the room’s been tainted.”
Then he looked at her.
“Well, I guess we should start. Truthfully, I’m not sure where to begin.”
“Let me help you. How could you do it?”