That damn dirty talk was doing something crazy to me. I was so turned on I couldn’t speak. I bit my lip and nodded my head. He whispered in my ear as he started to press into me, “My pleasure.”
He pressed in a little ways and it didn’t really hurt, but it felt weird. He was so big that he was already stretching me and he wasn’t even really in yet. He was making the hottest sounds. I was gonna have another orgasm, just listening to him.
I could tell that he was trying so hard not to hurt me. His forehead was covered in sweat and by the look on his face, it seemed like it was torture for him to go so slow. So I did the only thing I could think of. I grabbed his ass and pulled him all the way into me. We both screamed out and then we went completely still. Cade’s eyes were burning into mine. As I looked up at him I knew. I knew that this was it. This was the most perfect moment of my life.
Cade said, “I’m gonna move now.” With those words he started thrusting pretty hard. He howled as he came inside me. It was over pretty quick, but for a first time, I thought it was amazing. Cade collapsed on top of me. He was panting and still inside me.
“I’m sorry it was so fast. But when you, when you did
that
...holy shit, Suz. I couldn’t hold it in anymore. You’re fuckin’ amazin’.”
“You aren’t so bad yourself, cowboy,” I said breathlessly.
~Chapter 5~
Suzanna~
When we woke up the next morning, I had to leave. Cade’s parents were coming home and we didn’t want them to catch us in a compromising position. I thought the morning after would be really awkward, but it wasn’t. We woke up, we kissed a lot, Cade gave me a pop-tart, which he referred to as “the breakfast of champions”, and then he drove me home. He kissed me goodbye and told me he would see me at school on Monday. That was it. Everything seemed perfect, but nothing ever really is perfect, right?
When I got to school on Monday, I parked in my normal spot and immediately looked over for Cade’s truck. It was there.
Whew
…I couldn’t wait to see him. We usually met up every morning in the cafeteria before first bell to share some milk and some of those “breakfast of champions”. I was in the hallway almost all the way to the cafeteria when I heard them. Cade was talking to someone. I couldn’t tell who it was, because they weren’t saying much. Cade was doing all the talking.
“It was all a fuckin’ mistake.” I wasn’t sure I heard him right, so I got a little bit closer. “She’s like kissin’ my sister. I never should’ve kissed her. I never should’ve let it go that far. She was definitely not the chick I wanted to be screwin’ that night. I don’t know what the hell I’ll do today. I don’t even wanna see her face. I need ya to help me stay the hell away from her.”
It was like I had been punched in the gut.
“Like kissing his sister? “Never should’ve kissed her?”
How could he say that? It was the most amazing night of my life and he wished it had never happened?
I couldn’t be at school today. I couldn’t be near him. I made it to my car before I started sobbing. I held my face in my hands as his words kept running through my mind. How could he feel that way about me? After what we did? What he did to me. He was inside me and now he didn’t even want to see me?
The drive home seemed like it took forever. I don’t remember anything I saw on the way home, but apparently I didn’t kill anyone because I made it home in one piece.
“Suzanna? What are you doing back home?” My mom asked as she walked downstairs toward me.
“I’m not feeling good, Mom. Could you call the school and tell them I’m sick?” I was really hoping she would just say yes and drop it. I should’ve known better.
“No. Not until you tell me what the heck is going on. You were fine when you left the house this morning, right?” She asked in her normal snarky tone.
“I think I’ve got a bug or something. I just want to go to sleep.” I tried to start up the stairs, but she caught my arm and stopped me.
“I’m not stupid, Suzanna. Your face is beet red and your eyes look like they ain’t ever seen the light of day. I know you’ve been bawling your eyes out, now tell me why.” My mom actually looked like she cared. I almost believed she was being sincere.
“Oh my God, Mom, I’m fine. Don’t be so dramatic. I got sick when I got to school and I just want to go to sleep. Please, just let me go up to my room.” I pulled away from her hold and started back up the stairs. This time she didn’t stop me.
When I got to my room I shut the door and threw myself down in the middle of my bed. I had given everything to Cade. I thought after that night that he knew how I felt and I was stupid enough to think he felt the same way. What made me think that? It was just sex. It probably wasn’t even his first time. I was a joke. He was just humoring me. That thought made me sick. I ran to the bathroom and dry heaved in the toilet until I finally just laid down on the cold tile floor and cried myself to sleep.
“Suzanna?” My mom was knocking on the door. I opened my eyes and the room was pitch black. She pushed the door open and stepped in. “Cade is downstairs. I don’t know what the hell happened to you today, but I think it would be good for you to talk to someone. Since, that obviously won’t be me, you should talk to him. He’s your friend, right?” He was. He was my best friend until everything changed.
I didn’t even look at her. Some time ago I had got up and crawled into bed. I turned over and rolled myself up into my comforter. I buried my face in my pillow. My voice sounded muffled as I replied, “He is my friend, but I don’t feel like talking to him. Tell him I’ll see him at school tomorrow.”
“But, Su…”
I cut her off, “Please, Mom. Just give him the message.” I heard the door close and her footsteps going down the stairs.
Seeing him would not help the situation. If anything it would make it worse. I loved him and he didn’t feel the same. That was just something I was going to have to deal with. No matter what I wouldn’t have changed our night together. It was perfect. It was just this morning that I wish I could change. I really wished he would’ve talked to me about it, instead of talking to his buddies at school.
I laid in bed and thought about how I would feel walking into school tomorrow. I didn’t know how I was going to handle that. What if Cade had told other people we slept together? It could be all around school by now. I didn’t think he would do that, but I also didn’t think that it would mean nothing to him.
Cade~
I couldn’t wait to get to school on Monday morning and see Suzy Q. She was so fuckin’ amazin’. I hadn’t been able to stop thinkin’ about her since she left my house yesterday mornin’. The look on her face when I made her come was forever burned into my memory. Those beautiful eyes and perfect lips. Damn, I was gonna come in my Wranglers if I didn’t stop thinkin’ about her.
Most mornin’s, we would meet in the cafeteria and share breakfast. I walked in and found Cord leanin’ up against the wall talkin’ to Lisbeth. Well, they weren’t really talkin’. I thought I was gonna have to hose his ass down to get him away from her.
I grabbed his shoulder and tried to turn him around.
“What the hell?” Cord yelled as he turned to face me. “What’s your fuckin’ problem? Can’t you see I’m busy?”
“I need to talk to you. Sorry, Lisbeth,” I apologized as I shot a knowin’ grin her way. Their relationship was crazy. All sex, all the time. It wasn’t a bad deal I guess, but I wanted more. I mean sex was great, but I thought it was probably better because it was with someone I loved.
Fuck!
I sounded like a damn girl.
“Baby, I’ll meet you here after class, ‘kay?” Lisbeth told Cord as she ran her hand down his chest until it rested in the belt loop on his jeans. He leaned down and devoured her mouth in a searin’ kiss.
Holy shit!
If I was the type to blush, that would’ve done it. Lisbeth was a beautiful shade of red as she let go of his pants and started down the hall.
“This better be important,” Cord sneered at me.
“It is. It’s real damn important. Ya know I went to the party with Anna Saturday night.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“Well, I didn’t leave with her.”
“Okay, I didn’t see you. I spent most of the night in Lisbeth’s bed. God, that chick is fuckin’ perfect. She does this thing with her tongue…”
I cut him off, “We’re talkin’ about me, asshole. Not you and your fuck buddy.”
He punched me in the shoulder. “Don’t talk about her like that…
ever
.”
“Sorry. Won’t happen again. Now back to what’s important here…me.” What the hell was wrong with me? I was about to jump outta my hide. I wanted to tell somebody about what happened this weekend. Not to brag about my conquest, but just to share it with someone. I had to tell someone how happy she made me. Yep, I’m a fuckin’ girl now.
“So, who’d you finally screw? Anyone I know?” he asked with a raised eyebrow.
“Yeah, you know her. You know her pretty damn well.”
Cord grabbed my shoulders. “Fuckin’ finally! Suzanna?” He was grinnin’ from ear to ear. I nodded and he yelled, “Yahoo!”
“Shit, shut the hell up. I don’t want everyone in school to know about it.”
“So, was it…good?”
“Oh my fuckin’ God! Good is not the word I would use to describe it. It was perfect.” I couldn’t stop smilin’. That girl made me so happy.
“I was at the party kissin’ Anna and I realized it was all a fuckin’ mistake. She’s like kissin’ my sister. I never should’ve kissed her. I never should’ve let it go that far. She was definitely not the chick I wanted to be screwin’ that night. I don’t know what the hell I’ll do today. I don’t even wanna see her face. I need ya to help me stay the hell away from her.”
“Just tell her you don’t want nothin’ to do with her. She ain’t stupid. When she sees you and Suzanna together, she’ll back off.” Cord seemed more sure of that than I was. Anna was not the type to back off.
“She knows I took Suzy Q home. I don’t want her to start any shit about her, ya know? I love her, Cord.”
“Aw, ain’t that sweet.” Branch snarled as he stepped around the corner. “You wanna make babies with that red-headed whore?”
I grabbed him by the collar, “Guess you didn’t get enough of me Saturday night, huh?”
“I knew she was gonna be an easy lay, but goddamn she must’ve been desperate to give it up to you. Those virgins are so easy to pluck.” He let the
pluck
pop off his lips. Before he could say another word, I had him pinned against the wall. My right arm was pressed across his throat and my left arm was pressin’ his shoulder into the wall.
“Don’t you ever say a fuckin’ word about her. Do. You. Understand. Me. Asshole?” I was not playin’. I wanted to kick his ass right there in the cafeteria. Cord didn’t do a thing until Mr. Kennett came around the corner. Then he grabbed me and pulled me away from Branch.
“He ain’t worth it, cuz. Let’s get outta here, before you get in serious trouble.” I yanked my arm out of his grasp and lunged at Branch. “Understand?”
“Don’t think I heard you, Mr. Walker. Do I understand what?” He asked with an evil grin on his lips.
I tried to lunge at him again, but Cord caught me and pulled me down the hall. I was sick. My heart was about to beat outta my chest. I wanted to kill that bastard for talkin’ about my girl, I mean Suzy Q, that way.
When I got to homeroom, she wasn’t there. Where the hell was she? She was never late to school. She must’ve been sick or somethin’. I really hoped everything was okay.
Cord found me in the hall after first period. “So, how’s your day goin’?”
“She ain’t here. She didn’t come to school today. I asked Mr. Kennett and he told me her mom called and said she was sick. You think I hurt her?” I was scared. What if I’d done somethin’ to her? Or if I hurt her when we did it? It felt really good, but she did bleed. I thought that was normal for a virgin, but I didn’t really know.
“You sure she had a good time, cuz? Was she alright when she left?”
“She was fuckin’ fine. We made out in the mornin’ and then I drove her home. We kissed goodbye and everything.”
“Well, then maybe she’s just sick. She mighta caught somethin’.”
“I think I’m gonna take off and go check on her.”
“I wouldn’t do that if I were you. If she’s sick she needs the rest, and if it’s somethin’ to do with you, you don’t need to be buggin’ her. Wait til school’s out, then go check on her.”
I knew Cord was right. I needed to leave her alone. She had the flu or somethin’…I’m sure that was it. “I’ll have to go home and do chores, and then I’ll go check on her.”
“Sounds like a good plan. Now get your ass to class.”
I punched him in the arm and took off down the hall to my history class.
The rest of the day dragged. All I could think about was Suzy Q and that damn look on her face when we were in bed together. I needed to see that look again…soon.
I went home right after school and finished my chores. It took me a couple hours and then I told my mom to save some dinner for me. I went over to Suzy Q’s house and when I knocked on the door I waited patiently hopin’ she would answer.
When I knocked the second time, Mrs. Mallory opened the door.
“Hello, Cade,” she said with the same phony smile she always used when she talked to me. That woman was the biggest stuck up bitch I had ever met. I was always nice to her, but I knew she was thinkin’ about how worthless I was every time she laid eyes on me. The only nice thing I had to say about her was the woman could make a mean lemon bar.
“Is Suzanna feelin’ okay?” I asked.
“Not sure, haven’t really heard much out of her today. I’ll go up and get her for you. Wait here.” Mrs. Mallory motioned for me to sit down in the chair by the door.
I barely sat down before Mrs. Mallory was standin’ in front of me. “She’s still not feeling well, Cade. She said to tell you she’d see you at school tomorrow.”
“She don’t wanna see me?” My voice didn’t even sound like mine. It was crackin’ and sounded like I’d swallowed some sandpaper.
“No, son. Not tonight. You go on home now, and you can see her tomorrow.” She was gently guiding me out the door. She shut it to my back and I slowly walked out to my truck. When I got in and started the engine I looked up and saw that her room was dark. Not even her lamp, the one I knew she normally kept on by the bed, was lit. Maybe she was just sick. I was gonna pray that’s what it was.