Get It Done When You're Depressed (34 page)

It’s very important to take a realistic look at your life, first of all. When you ask a depressed person what they do that’s meaningful, 90 percent of the time they’ll say “nothing.” But careful reflection on this, often with the help of a significant other or therapist, can help you identify things you’re currently doing or have done in the past that do have purpose and meaning. It’s all about wading through the depression to get to the reality of the purpose your life already has. When you do this, if you truly find that your life lacks purpose, you can work from a stable and rational place to do something about it.

Maybe you can find purpose within a small part of your work. Is there something you do that you especially enjoy? Can you ask for more of that work and pass off the other work to someone who likes what you don’t? Examine what you really want and find a way to do it. The stronger your purpose, the more power you have over depression.

Here are some other thoughts to consider:

Remember:
Finding a purpose lessens your depression symptoms significantly. If you’re not sure of what your purpose is, start exploring today. Then go for it!

There are only so many hours in a week; that’s a fact you can’t get around, no matter how long your to-do (or
should
-do) list is. People
without
depression are often pressed for time. But when you have the added pressure of managing depression, your week can be even more stressful. Overscheduling when you’re depressed can be disastrous and could shut you down completely.

There are 168 hours in a week. On average, most people sleep 7 hours a night. Add to that 1 hour to each day for getting ready in the morning and then again for bed, and that’s 56 hours. 112 hours left. If you work outside the home, factor in commuting, lunch, and work hours, probably on the low side of 45 hours a week; you might also have to add business dinners, networking, or travel to this time. Assume the same for someone who is home with small children. This leaves 67 hours for outside obligations. Now assume 3 hours a day at least for eating and taking care of other personal needs, for a total of 21 hours. This leaves 46 hours. If you take care of children, you can add at least 2 hours a day devoted to your children. That’s 14 hours. This leaves a total of 32 hours. If you don’t have kids, it may be that those 2 hours a day are taken up by either television, seeing friends, or reading. If you exercise, you can assume at least 4 hours a week, which means 14 hours are left. For those who are overscheduled or those who work or go to school, this can be many more hours. Evening obligations can take up to an hour a day, as can yard work and house management, including bills. Talking on the phone is another time drainer. This leaves
4
hours a day for your other needs.

Where’s the time for you? Or alone time with a partner? Running errands, seeing friends, going to movies, art, going to the doctor, or trips to the bank? If you work more than 40 hours a week, you can see how this time can easily dwindle to 0. No wonder a depressed person wants to shut down! There can be little time for self-rejuvenation.

Do any of these signs that you might need to keep better track of your time sound familiar to you?

People often focus on how much time they have on a specific day instead of planning ahead for a week’s worth of hours. If this is the case for you, it may be that you’re being too hard on yourself for not getting things done when the real problem is simply not having enough time!

How am I supposed to get all the things I need to get done with such limited time? I think this is why I literally shut down when I’m depressed. All I want to do is get into bed and pull the covers over my head, but if I actually do this (I used to do it a lot), then I feel even more overwhelmed and things keep piling up.

When I really looked at the hours I have to work, take care of my kids, and take care of my basic needs, I just felt so much relief. I thought it was a lack of time management on my part. But now I know that time is limited and there’s only so much I can do. Period. It was a tough adjustment, but I now use an hourly planner, and I look at it a lot. It really makes a difference.

I tend to overbook myself when I’m depressed. It’s actually good for me, but there are limits. When I plan to do two things on one night a few hours apart, or if I have five phone calls to return in a day, I can’t get it all done. Depression is so darn sneaky. On the days that I’m lonely and the hours loom in front of me, the depression says, “See, Julie. No one wants to be with you.” Then the phone will start ringing and I’ll make plans and the depression says, “You’re doing too much, Julie. You don’t have time for this!” I can never win with that logic.

Maybe you have to stop and face reality. If you’re depressed and it’s not getting better, you might be doing so much that your brain can’t keep up.

When you’re depressed, you usually aren’t as productive or efficient as when you’re well. You don’t use your time effectively and you waste a lot of time. This can lead to feelings of even lower self-worth. Plus, people with agitated depression can take on too much with the same result as those who can’t work well at all.

Time may be relative, but it’s finite when it comes to your day. It doesn’t bend or give you a break. If you’re not getting enough sleep, getting things done, or living the life you want, you might be trying to squeeze 30 hours of work into a 24-hour day.

Here are some other thoughts to consider: