Authors: Jo Watson
“Jackson, it all feels so good. I want you as desperate for me as I am for you.” My hands are on his chest and our kisses are deep and anxious now. Jackson takes my hand in his and glides it down his body. As our hands travel lower and lower my heartbeat begins to race again. Guiding my hand, Jackson cups his hard length through his jeans and I understand he is showing me that I am having the same effect on him as he is on me.
“I think you had me past desperate about ten minutes ago, Rookie.” His hand leaves mine to return to my breasts, but I let my hand rest where he has left it, curious about what is under his zipper.
“It’s my move, right?” I ask playfully and Jackson’s chuckle is so sexy my ache grows with each vibration of his voice.
“Yes, and if you don’t make one soon I’m going to make one for you.” Jackson drops his hands to the bottom of my skirt and starts trailing his hands underneath the fabric and up toward the ache. I know what I want now; I unbutton my skirt and shimmy it over my hips until it is loose enough to drop to the floor. I step out of it, look up to Jackson and watch as his chest heaves with the breaths he is taking. He wants me as badly as I want him.
“Your move,” I whisper seductively, and Jackson grabs my ass and lifts me, causing my legs to instinctively wrap around his waist. The pressure of his jeans against my core causes a small gasp to escape my lips.
“Fuck, Maddy—that was the sexiest sound I’ve ever heard.” He presses me tighter against him and I move my hips, searching for the friction I crave so desperately. I hold tightly to Jackson’s neck as he crawls up the bed and lays me back against the pillows. My legs are still around him and he grinds into me while claiming my mouth again. This feeling is euphoric; I have been missing so much. I spread my legs and put my feet on the bed to give me leverage to push up against him. Jackson runs his hand down my leg, hooking his hand under my knee and raising my leg so that our bodies fit tightly together.
After a few minutes of nibbles and gasps, Jackson shifts to my side and I can still feel his need as he presses against my hip. His hand is at my breast again, only this time he isn’t kissing me, he is watching me closely, studying the way my breath catches and the rise and fall of my chest. As Jackson leans in to kiss my breasts, he softly trails his hand down my stomach and then slips one finger under the top of my panties traveling across the top from hip to hip.
Gazing up at me through hooded eyes Jackson whispers, “Your move, Rookie.” I reach down to undo his pants, but he places his hand on top of mine and shakes his head no. “I need to leave my pants on—they’re the only thing keeping me from taking this all the way. Touching you and watching you experience all of this is killing me.”
I watch him for a minute as I try to understand what he has just said. Jackson runs his hand over my hip and then down over my mound, cupping my core and applying just enough pressure to increase the ache instead of relieving it. His fingers slip beneath the side of my panties and I close my eyes with the pleasure of his fingers in my folds. I tip my hips up and lock my thumbs under the lace of my panties, pulling them down my legs and tossing them to the floor.
Jackson claims my mouth again and presses his hand over my core, circling his fingers against me in a relentless rhythm that build and builds until I am pressing myself up against his fingers. I’m on the edge and I close my eyes, wanting to focus on the intensity of this feeling. When my legs begin to shake, Jackson slips his finger inside me and I shudder all around him as my orgasm tears through me. I hear Jackson groan beside me as he presses against me, pulsing and warm. We gasp for air, kissing each other between breaths until we have calmed down. He kisses my lips one last time and then lifts himself from the bed.
“I’ll be back in a minute, Rookie, don’t move.” He grabs something out of his dresser and walks into the ensuite bathroom. He smiles as he closes the door behind him, and the thought that I am laid out across his bed completely naked enters my consciousness. I put my panties back on and grab his shirt from the floor. I breathe in deep as I pull his shirt over my head and relish the way it still holds the warmth from his body.
I hear the water running for a few minutes as I sit on the edge of his bed, not sure what to do next. Jackson opens the bathroom door and emerges in only a pair of tight boxer briefs. He shuts the light off and climbs into bed on the opposite side from me. He throws the covers back and pats the sheets next to him, flashing me a big smile.
“I should go, Jackson, it’s late.” I try to stand but he grabs my wrist and shakes his head no.
“It’s my move, Rookie, and I say you’re staying the night. Now get over here and let me show you how good it feels to fall asleep cuddled up against someone.” I smile and nod, climbing under the covers. Jackson folds himself around me, my back to his chest. He pulls me so close to him that there is not a place where my body isn’t touching his.
“Maddy, tonight was unbelievably hot. It might have been the most erotic thing I have ever seen, watching you come apart against me. Go to sleep, beautiful—we have a lot to accomplish in just three weeks.” Jackson kisses my forehead, then rests his head on the pillow behind me.
“Thank you for tonight, Jackson,” I say as I pull his arm close around my chest.
“Don’t thank me yet, Rookie, we’re just getting started.”
Chapter Eight
It’s been three days since I first woke up in Jackson’s arms. I slept the entire night wrapped up in him and as fairy-tale as it sounds, it changed my life. When we woke up he took me back to my place so that I could freshen up, and then we walked hand in hand to a small café where we ate pancakes and drank coffee while getting to know each other better. I feared it would be awkward, like what took place between us would somehow be wrong for us and drive us apart, but it was entirely comfortable. Our breakfast felt like two old friends meeting to catch up on each other’s lives—except while waiting for our food or our check, we couldn’t keep from touching each other.
Our time together was spent talking and touching, a brush of a hand on my leg, a twist of my hair around his fingers or a light kiss on my head as he tucked me into his side in the booth. I felt the same way toward him, as if I couldn’t stop myself from holding his hand or flipping his hat around on his head. We spent the day together, walking around the city, holding hands and exploring the town and each other.
Every day since then we have been together. Tonight he has to leave town for a game and I am trying not to mope as we watch TV with Abby and Kyle. I can’t help but to feel cheated, like his game is taking time away from my three weeks. I am not even sure what show we are watching, because Jackson has been running his fingers up and down my arm as I lean against him. Abby throws a piece of popcorn at me and I throw a handful at her in return. It only takes a minute for a full-on war to break out and we are whizzing popcorn back and forth across the apartment.
Laughing so hard I can’t breathe, I follow Jackson as he makes an escape to my room. I am being pelted from behind as we run down the hall. Jackson falls back on the bed and puts a piece of popcorn that was tucked in his collar into his mouth. I try to pick the pieces out of my hair but I can’t get them all and Jackson motions for me to come over to him so he can help. When I reach the end of the bed, Jackson hooks his hands behind my knees and pulls me down onto the bed so that I am straddling him.
With that small move the mood changes, and I look into Jackson’s eyes as he pulls me higher onto his body, holding the backs of my thighs when I close the distance and begin to kiss him. We kiss until my lips are sore and Jackson has explored my body with his hands. I want to push it farther but I know that Jackson is leaving early, and needs to get some rest so he can do schoolwork on the plane. I kiss his neck and he pulls my hair back off my face, gathering it all at my nape with his hands.
“I don’t want you to go,” I say before I can stop myself, and then close my eyes so I don’t have to see the look on his face. We have not been together long enough for me to say things like that and I am surprised when he kisses my lips and tells me he doesn’t want to leave me.
“Maddy, don’t ever be embarrassed to tell me how you feel.” He lets go of my hair and twirls the ends between his fingers. “I need to know something before I leave.” His face is softer now and I can see concern in his eyes.
“What, Jackson?” I sit up so that I can get a better look at his face as he speaks.
“I know I don’t have a right to ask you about a lot of things—we are just getting to know each other—but I’m going to admit that the thought of being so far away from you for a few days has me on edge. I think about you calling him. When I’m with you I know there is so much between us, but when I’m at my place or with the team, I feel like my head is somewhere else. I think about how much time we have left and I feel sick. The other day at practice while running some plays, I thought of what you might be doing, or who you might be thinking about, and I wanted to run off the field and find you.”
We sit for a minute, just looking at each other, and I offer a small nod. Jackson leans up on his elbows and kisses my lips gently. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me—I am not the caveman type. I don’t usually give a shit where a girl is when she’s not with me, and I certainly don’t usually care what she’s thinking about when I’m playing ball. I just want to know…I know right now I’m a long shot, but please tell me I’m still in the game.”
I run my hand through his hair and smile down at him. “Jackson, you are the first-string quarterback in real life and in the metaphorical ‘game.’ My thoughts are always with you. Being with you is unbelievable, but I have to think about more than just my own happiness when it comes to choosing relationships. No matter how these three weeks end, you have to know you have my heart, and this time we spend together will be the happiest three weeks of my life.”
“I would never wish that were true, Rookie.” Jackson brushes his knuckles across my forehead and then tucks my hair behind my ears. I am confused; maybe I read the signals wrong. “Maddy, my wish for you is that one day you will look back on these three weeks with me and realize it was the time that you loved me the
least.
I know it’s too soon to say we love each other now, but this is
my
wish, so I’m allowed to hope that whatever this is between us grows until we do call it love. As for your happiest three weeks—you haven’t seen anything yet.” He kisses me again, with a passion that I have grown to crave.
He flips us over so that he is on top of me, cradled between my legs. I can’t get enough of this man and I pull him close to me as I feel the last threads of my resistance fray. I wanted these three weeks to be a time of exploration, a little space to get a few things out of my system. I had no intention of growing attached to anyone, but Jackson has changed that. I think of him first thing when I wake up and he is the last person I talk to before I go to sleep.
Jackson pulls my attention back to the present moment when he slides my shirt up and over my head. I feel the bristle of whiskers across my chest as he kisses his way across my breasts. I lean up to get a grip on the bottom of his shirt and he takes the opportunity to unhook my bra and slide it down my arms. I pull his shirt off and enjoy the warmth of his chest pressed against mine as I run my fingernails lightly down his back. He slides his hand down the back of my leg, bends my knee and pulls my leg around his waist. This is what I have been waiting for, the moment when I let go of all of the rules and allow myself to feel wanted and confident in my ability to bring a man to the edge of need and desire.
His hips grind down on me and send a shot of longing through my body. His hands pass over my skin with such perfection that in no time I am arching up to meet him and matching his slow rhythm, rocking my hips against him. It is clear that he wants me as he kisses my neck and presses every inch of himself against me. I feel his phone vibrating in his front jeans pocket and as it comes into his awareness he slows down the kisses, but does not pull away entirely. His lips meet mine gently and he places small kisses across my face.
Our eyes are open now and as his phone beeps with a message and then begins to ring again, we both know it is time for him to go. Jackson pulls back, looks into my eyes and gives me a kiss on my forehead before moving to my side and retrieving his phone from his pocket. He types out a quick text, and then with a look of regret and hesitation he tells me it is time for him to go. I nod my head but find it impossible to speak.
We sit up and put our clothes and shoes back on in silence, neither of us addressing the feeling of sadness that has entered the room like a thick fog. Greg left days ago and while I miss his presence, I am now acutely aware that my heart does not. My heart wants Jackson. I’m falling for him and I can’t help but notice the way that sits uneasily in my stomach. If I know what it feels like to fall, I might soon know what it feels like to be broken.
I walk him to my door and he kisses me one last time. Some of his teammates are waiting for him in a car outside, and they honk the horn and yell. Jackson promises to call and text when he can, then I watch as he jogs out to the waiting car. I stand on my front step, my arms folded across my chest against the cold. I am not sure how long I stay like this, staring after the path his body took away from me, but I become aware of Abby standing in the doorway, watching me.
“Oh, Madeline.” Her voice is soft and full of concern, and I know that she has seen more than I would have told her. “You’re going to break his heart, you know.” I look up to meet her eyes and give a small shrug.
“I could choose him.” I try to sound sure of myself but we both know that my family would have a fit if I did. Abby wraps her arm around my waist and rests her head on my shoulder. We stare out into the dark night at nothing.
I wish my mother were here so I could ask her if this is what it felt like with John. I need to know how she walked away from this, how she could have such light in her life and shut it out for her family.