Something Worth Fighting For (26 page)

“Still want a puppy, huh?”

“Yeah, what kind should I get? What kind would you like? You never told me.”

“Something that would protect you.”

“Of course you would say that.” I threw my hands up as he laughed.

“Anything but a chihuahua or some other yappy little shit.”

“Oh you don’t want to me to carry around a yorkie in my purse?” I smirked.

“Not hardly.”

“What about a bigger dog? A pit bull or something?”

“Yeah, that sounds like a winner.” He nodded.

“I think I’ll go see if I can adopt one when I get back.”

“Good, it can keep you company until I get home.”

“And protect me.”

“Yes, and protect you.”

“I miss you.” I said softly as I stared at his beautiful, tired, dirt covered face.

“I miss you too, Ellie, so damn much.” I raised my hand back to the screen again as he did, letting our fingers line up from miles away. “You’re all I think about.”

“I know, baby, same here. You should be getting a new box soon.” I smiled to fight the tears again.

“Really? What’s this one themed?”

“Spring break, of course.”

“So you’re going to come out topless?”

“Um, that’s a negative, this isn’t Cancun.” I laughed, rolling my eyes.

“A man can dream.”

“We’ll discuss that when you get back.”

“Don’t tease a desperate man.”

“Not teasing, just something to look forward to.”

“And I do, I definitely do.” He ran his hand over his face. “I have to go, I need to get busy.”

“I know, tell the guys I love them and I’ll see them soon.”

“I will. Thank you for letting me see Ma and Ares.”

“You’re very welcome, baby. Be careful, please.”

“I always am.”

“I love you, Atlas, always.” I blew him a kiss that he pretended to catch.

“I love you, Ellie, always.”

I wiped away the tears as the screen went black and his name signed off. One more day down, one more day closer to seeing him again.

I shutdown my laptop and put it back in Atlas’ room, heading down the hall for Ares’ room. Andy met me in the hallway instead.

“Did you get to talk to him?”

“Yes ma’am, he was in really good spirits. I think seeing you guys made a big difference.”

“Can you set that up on my computer too?”

“Of course, I’ll do it while I’m here.”

“Thank you,” she hugged me tightly not letting go, “Thank you for letting me see him. Thank you for coming. Thank you for being part of his life.” She sobbed into my shoulder.

“Shhh, it’s okay.” I rubbed her back. “I miss him too. He’ll be home soon.” I consoled her. “I am glad to be here, I needed to be here. I needed a mom too.” I confided in her as we stood in the hallway, holding each other.

“You’re welcome here anytime, Ellie. You’re one of my kids now too.” She kissed my cheek and wiped her eyes. “Enough tears, let’s go talk about that boy of ours.” She hooked my arm with hers, leading me to the kitchen.

“I think I’m going to get a puppy when I get back. It’ll be good company for me while he’s gone and a friend for him when he gets back.” I said as I sat down at the bar.

“That is an excellent idea.” She poured us each a glass of wine as she sat down next to me. “Atlas always loved dogs, it’ll be a good companion for him. How is school?”

“It’s a bit overwhelming right now. Between working, school, getting my things ready to graduate, and staying up all hours so I don’t miss an opportunity to talk to Atlas it can get exhausting.”

“I can imagine. That sounds like a lot to deal with.”

“It is but it’s not for too much longer. I graduate in May and that will be one less thing to take off my plate.”

“Have you thought about what you’re going to do afterward?”

“I know I want to work with kids. I’ve always been so set on helping kids that were in bad situations.” I took a drink, swallowing the sweet liquid. “I know music was an outlet for me when my parents were going through their stuff. I’m hoping to figure out a way to incorporate that into my work.”

“That’s a great thing to want to do, Ellie.” Andy smiled at me. “I’m sure your father is proud.”

“He is, he tells me all the time.”

“What about your mother, have you spoken to her?”

“No, we haven’t spoken in five years.” I took another drink.

“Why is that if I might ask?”

“She blames me for things that weren’t my fault. She didn’t believe me when everything happened, she’s just... She wasn’t a very good mother.”

“What happened to you? Wow, that was rude. You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want.”

I stared down at my wine glass with raised eyebrows. I was surprised to see that Atlas hadn’t told her, especially after the first time I was here. Atlas’ tags were resting against my chest, moving with every breath I took. After another drink I sat the glass down and looked out the window at the lake. It was where I had told Atlas the entire story. He was all over this house for me and for them, memories of him. Even away he was with me and with that it gave me courage. He gave me strength at my weakest and most vulnerable stages.

I opened my mouth and began to tell Andy my story.

❋❋❋

To:
Ellie Grant

From:
Atlas Ryker

March 9, 2014

You amazing, crazy, beautiful woman. I can’t believe you’re in Texas without me. Were they completely shocked to see you? It was just fantastic to see them. It really helped my mood. Let me guess, Jacks picked you up and dropped you off and told you wild stories about when we were kids? I’d bet good money that happened. I’m just I think for one of the few times since I’ve been in this sandbox-- happy. I really needed to see them and you. Thank you for that.

Sleeping in my room, huh? I bet you’ll have great dreams there. I mean I dream about being back there with you and our room, the bathroom, the kitchen, the back of your car... Oh yes, Ellie, I am thinking about all of you. I can’t wait to touch all of you. To feel your curves under my hands... For now the memories will have to do until we can make some new ones.

I miss you terribly. I can’t wait to have you in my arms. To touch you through more than the screen. I love you, always.

             
-Atlas

❋❋❋

I made good on my word and visited Katie the next day. Her belly was big and swollen with what she confided in me was their son. “We’re naming him Reid.” She smiled, rubbing her belly.

“I love it, it’s so cute. Reid Preston.” I smiled, sitting on the bed next to her. “What about a middle name?”

“Atlas,” she said softly, “Reid Atlas.”

“It’s perfect, Uncle Atlas will love it.” I reached over running my hand over her stomach.

“We thought so.”

“I can’t wait to meet him. Reid, come out and meet Aunt Ellie!” Katie laughed, shaking her head.

“Not yet, keep cooking, buddy. Have you two talked about a wedding yet?”

“No but I know he plans to propose when he gets back.” I stared dreamily out the window, thinking of the moment he would return. It was something I had been fantasizing about since the day he left.

“What kind of dress do you want?”

“I’m thinking short, tea length. I want something cute, spunky. I want to get married on the  beach so I don’t want a long dress.”

“Something like you.”

“Exactly! Short, cute, and spunky.” I laughed. “I hope you two will get to be there for it.”

“We wouldn’t miss it, Ellie. Come Hell or high water.”

“Alright, Katie, that’s enough girl time for today.” Jacks was standing in the bedroom doorway, smiling at the two of us. 

“Jackson don’t you tell me what I can and can’t do.” Katie pouted as I checked my phone.

“He’s right, you need your rest, sweetie.” I leaned over kissing her cheek. “If I don’t see you before I leave I’ll call you.”

“It was so good to see you.” She hugged me tightly.

“You too. Take care of my girl, Jackson.” I pointed my finger at him as I passed through their doorway. I took the keys to the truck out of my purse, noticing my phone vibrating.

“Hello?” I answered as I stepped out into the fading spring sun.

“Hey baby.”

“Atlas!” I knocked on the door as Jacks opened it back up. “Say hi,” I turned the speakerphone on.

“Hello?”

“Jackson, my man, how are you?”

“Well slap my ass and call me Sally, if it isn’t the famous war hero.” Jacks joked, grinning.

“How’s the little lady?”

“Very pregnant with my son.”

“Son, huh? Congrats, man, that’s awesome.”

“I’m stoked.” Jacks pulled out his cigarettes, tapping the pack on the side of the house. “We’re naming him Reid. Reid Atlas, after his uncle, ya’ know.”

“Shit man, thank you, I’m honored. As much as I like talking to you, I need to talk to my girl. I love ya’ bro, take care.”

“You too man, stay safe.” I turned the speaker off and waved to Jacks as I climbed into the truck.

“I’m getting spoiled talking to you so often.” I started the truck, backing out of the drive.

“I had a free minute. Are you in my truck?” He laughed, causing my heart to race.

“I am! It’s hard to drive but Ares let me borrow it so I could go see Katie.”

“They treating you good?”

“You know they are. Mom and I talked for hours last night, it was really nice.”

“I’m glad to hear it, baby.” Atlas cleared his throat. “I miss you, Ellie.”

“I miss you too, Atlas. Is something wrong?”

“We’re going out later and I just wanted to hear your voice. I don’t want you to worry but I wanted you to know. I probably won’t be in touch for a while.”

“Are you worried?” The words were caught in my throat.

“No, I’ve been in worse. But I’m realistic so if the last thing I hear is your voice then if worst comes to worst I’ll have that to take that with me.” His words caused me to, for once, not hold back the tears.

“Be careful, please.”

“Don’t cry, baby, please, don’t cry.”

“I’m sorry. I just hate that thought. I know it’s reality but that doesn’t make it any easier. Be careful. Come home to me. Call me when you are safe. I need to know you’re safe.”

“I will, I promise, I don’t know when but I will.” Atlas sighed softly. “I have to go. Ellie, think about something for me?”

“Okay?”

“Calling your mother.”

“Be careful, please.” I repeated the words again, not willing to say anything about the request. “I love you, Atlas, always.”

“I love you, Ellie, always. Please know that.”

I pulled into Andy’s driveway as the phone went silent. I laid my head on the steering wheel and cried as my heart broke. I would worry until I heard his voice again.

❋❋❋

To:
Atlas Ryker

From:
Ellie Grant

March 16, 2014

I know you can’t get this right now but by chance you do, I need you to know that I’m thinking about you. I miss your voice, your emails, your touch, everything about you. Be careful, please. I love you, always.

             
~Ellie

To:
Atlas Ryker

From:
Ellie Grant

March 17, 2014

I know I keep sending you these. I just wish I knew that you were okay. I need a sign from the universe, a carrier pigeon, an owl from
Hogwarts
, smoke signals, anything would help. I’m trying my best to stay positive and Dad assures me you will call the second you get a chance but it’s so hard not knowing. I’ve been trying to hold off emailing you because I know you can’t check them but just incase I thought I would let you know how much I miss you. Be careful, please. I love you, always.

             
~Ellie

             
P.S. I’m calling her.

❋❋❋

The phone was ringing on the other end as I sat in our bed back home in our apartment. It had been over a week since Atlas’ last phone call and I still hadn’t talked to my mother. I had thought about it but never got the courage. Tonight was going to be the night that I got up the courage to call.

“Hello?” Her voice came through the other line, sending chills down my spine.

“Hi.” I managed to choke out.