Tantric Orgasm for Women (7 page)

Breasts and Excitement

A certain kind of touch or stimulation of the breasts by a man can produce a sudden surge of excitement or a desire to have a peak kind of orgasm. You might experience it as a real compulsion, an overwhelming urge that you simply
must
go with the desire and follow it through to the end. Touch or stimulation provoking this effect should be avoided or modified a little, perhaps offered more softly or with less intention. A relaxed, easy, caring touch will enable the deeper magnetic response to gather in woman and not flip her over into a state filled with desire for excitement and conventional orgasm.

Any hard squeezing, sucking, and stimulation of the nipples will often have this instant turn-on effect. But it can also have the entirely opposite effect—of turning a woman
off
, suddenly leaving her with no wish to go further. Which way she will react depends on the individual woman, her age, and how she has been handled by men in the past. Each unpleasant experience leaves a cellular imprint, a memory in the cells of the body, that creates a subtle barrier and layer of protection. (We will consider this again in chapter 6, in relation to the vagina.) Conscious melting of a man’s hands into the breasts without squashing or squeezing them—not doing anything special other than sensing the breasts, feeling the energy of the breasts, loving them—works wonders. Avoid overstimulating the nipples, especially in the early stages of lovemaking or foreplay.
It is appropriate to touch and squeeze the nipples with more firmness when sexual arousal is complete and lovemaking well underway.
When the energy is flowing freely, the pressure to the nipples can cause delightful things to happen.

Direct and invincible evidence of how crucial the breasts are is that loving stimulation of the breasts encourages and increases lubrication in the vagina. Almost all women experience this. Through the magnetic link and overflow of energy, the lubrication glands in the vagina respond abundantly. In fact, there is a great deal more lubrication when the breasts are lovingly touched compared to when the vagina or clitoris is touched directly in foreplay prior to penetration.

Women who have had a breast removed for medical reasons report that the positive pole continues to be active
even in the absence of the phys
ical breast.
The same filling up and spilling over into the vagina happens, as does the lubrication of the vagina. This remarkable feedback bears witness to the integrity of the body. The breast is more than just juicy flesh; it deeply embodies an energy dimension that remains active even in its physical absence.

A woman with one breast removed shares her experience:
“When I touch my right breast in a delicate, quick, patting way, my vagina responds—it twitches and quivers and a wonderful wavelike, joyful current of sexual energy flows through my vagina, from the womb outward right to the vulva and clitoris. I can even feel the spot of my nipple and its connection to the vagina, although on the right side there is no physical breast anymore; there is only a thirty-centimeter scar.

“I am happy! It is so beautiful. With conscious loving touch and holding of the right breast ‘in the air’ as it were, it is fantastic. Sometimes I even
feel the sensations more strongly and more vaginally than with the left breast.
Interesting enough is that this most often occurs when sex is happening with heartfulness. With ‘horny sex’ I experience the touching of my scar as stimulating, often in the clitoris, but definitely much less than with the left breast. My partner is very sensitive; he can even feel the vibration of the nipple on the outside of the absent breast. I experience the energetic touch as a deep vaginal opening, and it creates a longing of the heart for deep touch.

“Since we discovered more about sexuality our sexual life has clearly moved in the direction of the heart and is creating a supportive, loving, divine atmosphere. One time after a deep union of hearts my lover shared, ‘In the beginning it mattered to me. I was having thoughts about your having only one breast, particularly because I am attracted to big breasts. But now I feel everything is totally fine, as long as the heart is present and can be felt between us.’ Sometimes my mind becomes doubtful, thinking: ‘This isn’t possible; this is just a scar! You’re crazy, you’re just imagining things!’ And then I observe that in tandem with the negative thinking, the
pleasing sensations are instantly gone. Then I feel into my body, into my vagina, and the moment I am able to accept my situation, and my lover touches
both
breasts a little more quickly, I again feel a strong twitching in my vagina. And there they are again: my two breasts! One time, lying naked in the sun after a deep penetration by my lover, I could distinctly feel my right breast when I touched it energetically, “in the air” so to speak. Because I am a skeptic, I immediately tried to just imagine being touched. I could feel something then too, but the sensation was much less than compared to the energetic touching by a conscious, loving hand.

“I received my diagnosis of breast cancer in 1993. My life had been ruled by fear, abuse, many years of drug use, a heavy and closed heart, and a certain longing to die. By means of awareness, with the help of countless workshops, meditations, and therapeutic groups, my life has transformed into conscious enjoyment, into a deep love of the universe, of life, with often a childlike joy and ease. My longing for real love, letting go, trust, flowing, inner peace, and connectedness has come true.”

Deliberate Interference with the Breasts

It is extremely fashionable for women to have their natural breasts altered; in some countries it is considered normal to have artificial breasts, and a woman who has not had a breast enlargement is something of a rarity. As body piercing gains popularity around the world, some women choose to pierce their nipples, others their lips, and others their labia. And it seems that as the sexual confusion increases generation by generation, these types of enhancement and ornamentation are done at an increasingly young age.

In light of the crucial role of the breasts in female sexual energy circulation, cosmetic surgery to breasts raises certain issues. Fortunately, it is clear from the personal experience reported here that interventions do not ultimately destroy the energy intrinsic to breasts. It is also true that a woman’s incentive and wish to be proud of her breasts is quite possibly a reflection of her intuition that her breasts play a dynamic and creative role in the sexual exchange, and therefore in her life. The urge to display her breasts to man naturally follows, and so the media and fashion world use
exposed breasts in any way possible. One might say it’s a good thing that men have greater opportunity to appreciate breasts through such displays. A woman’s intention to display the positive, radiant pole is laudable—but sadly, her focus is misdirected. She is focused outward toward man, not inward toward herself. Breast enhancement surgery fixates a woman on the
outside
of her body, on her external appearance, not on how she feels
internally. It then is not so easy to turn around, look within, and access the inner sensations of living breast tissue.

Some women have breast reductions because their breasts are so uncomfortably large that they become a physical and psychological burden to live with. In these circumstances, reducing the size can be considered a medical intervention and of psychological benefit. It can also be argued that increasing the size of the breasts puts a woman more at ease, gives her more confidence and trust in herself and her powers of attraction;
in other words, that it benefits the woman herself. The added fullness of the
breasts may result in attracting the male attention that a woman wants, but at a
subtle level she might unconsciously begin to protect her breasts because they feel delicate. As a result she may be perhaps not so willing to let a man touch them. Men have shared with me that they can sense this, and that they will stay away from touching a woman’s breasts in these situations. The breasts can feel uncomfortable; scars are sensitive, some never really healing properly. Artificial breasts have been known to explode during air flight! All these disturbances can easily affect the expansion of energy from the positive pole.

A woman might question whether encouraging a man to lust after her perfect
breasts really serves her orgasmic potential in the long run. When a woman loves
her own breasts and allows a man to love her breasts, they respond to the
positive attention. Many women report an increase in breast size after they
begin to make love according to female and male polarity—through bringing the
breasts into their rightful magnetic alignment. Uncalled-for intervention of the
breasts is a disturbance that interferes with the delicate magnetic system given to woman by nature.

A young and quite beautiful woman I met in a workshop told me she had enhanced her breasts two years earlier, saying, “You know, it was one
of those things I just had to do, and after I did it I realized that I need not have done it.” She had been thinking of reversing the operation, but after receiving the information on the importance of the positive pole, she decided that for the present she would finally accept her breasts as they are now and not interfere a second time. She was pleased, and relieved, to observe an overflow from her breasts to her vagina when she began making love using tantric principles.

Awareness and Sensitivity Preparation
Self-Massage of the Breasts

Massaging the breasts on a regular basis helps to reinforce the
feelings of life force (also called
chi, energy,
or
prana
) present in the breasts. You will notice them becoming more sensitive and receptive. You will find it easier to get a feeling of them from the inside any time you put your awareness in them. Self-massage also helps you get to know your own breasts, to accept them, and to love them. Use body lotion or massage oil if you like. Breasts are ideally always massaged upward or in a circular motion, the left breast counterclockwise and the right breast clockwise. Lift the breast tissue upward as much as possible and include your chest and throat.

This practice is also a natural way of monitoring any changes in the breast tissue. If anything feels abnormal, is painful or itchy, is not associated with the onset of menstruation, and does not disappear after a short time, report it to a doctor immediately. It is not necessarily a cause for alarm, but have it checked as soon as you’ve detected it.

It is also beneficial to include with the breasts a deeper massage on the rib cage. Using your thumb or first two fingers braced together, make little circling movements that reach through your skin to the bone. Start with the breastbone (sternum), traveling up and down two or three times. In the center of the breastbone, on a line with the nipples of upright breasts, is the “love-spot”—an important energy point that lies over the thymus gland. Massaging here stimulates the immune system and is also a doorway to the heart. On each side of the breastbone is a series of little hollow spaces between the ribs, where the ribs join the sternum. These are called the intercostal
spaces. Massage of these points encourages the growth of the breasts and also relaxes physical and emotional tensions. Massage the intercostal spaces using the fingertips in the circular way described above. It is also good to extend the massage to
the ribs themselves, using a circling motion on the bone and between the bones; you can track the ribs with your fingers as they run behind the breasts and into the armpit area. You can also reach certain parts of the ribs by getting your four fingers under and behind the pectoralis muscle (the muscle that forms the front of the armpit and runs across the chest). You can use this massage sequence as complete in itself, as foreplay before making love, or followed by the tantric breast meditation below.

Partner-Exchange Exercise
Partner Exchange Massage for Breasts and Penis

It helps to show and teach each other how you like to be touched, communicating what opens and resonates in your body. Focus on touching with warmth and love; avoid the kind of touch that is intentionally stimulating and therefore has different effects. The aim is for the body energy to expand and flow first, not to arouse the body into excitement by touch. Put aside forty minutes or more for this exchange, depending on whether you wish to make love afterward, which is quite likely to happen.

Take several drops of unscented massage oil (such as almond or olive oil) in your hands and begin to touch and massage your own breasts with oil, showing your partner what pressure your breasts enjoy and what they do not respond well to. Show him how you prefer the nipples to be touched—or maybe not touched, perhaps just held by the palm of the hand. Share in this way for a few minutes, explaining as you go along, and then pour a few drops onto his hands so that he is able to continue massaging you in the way you most appreciate.

Lie back or sit up and absorb his caresses into your breasts for fifteen or twenty minutes. In general, the lighter the touch the greater the sensuality; featherlight works wonders. After completing this part, your man should do the same by showing you how to touch his penis and testicles, and then allowing you to take over the massage.

The orientation in this exchange is toward increasing feelings of aliveness,
of awakening, but not directly toward any stages of full-blown excitement, where
we get overwhelmed with desire. After a further fifteen to twenty minutes of the
woman loving the penis with her hands, if it feels appropriate continue with a
very slow penetration. All subsequent movements should happen in an unhurried, lazy manner.

Tantric Meditation
Meditating on the Breasts

Lie down alone in the ideal position for relaxation suggested in
chapter 1, with about twenty minutes for yourself. Breast meditation can be done daily and will greatly support your breasts in coming to life and encourage the opening of your positive pole. If you have a lover, you can also use it as a part of foreplay or preparation for love, either on your own or with your partner lying in bed beside you.

If you wish, place a slightly cupped hand on each breast. Touching will enhance the feeling within the breasts, making it easier to bring awareness into them. If your elbows become uncomfortable at any time, change the position of your hands, placing them on the groin or lying with your arms straight at your sides. Close your eyes and take your awareness into your body, sensing your breasts and in particular your nipples. “Feel the fine qualities of creativity permeating your breasts and assuming delicate configurations.”
²
Move into your breasts; let your breasts become your whole being. Melt into them, merge into them. The whole body can become secondary to the breasts; the body can fade into the background as you bring the breasts into the foreground. Your inner emphasis is on the breasts, totally relaxing in them, moving in them. Do this for twenty minutes and then simply rest for a few more minutes. True feminine creativity arises when the breasts become active.