“You
won’t let me have you. Why can’t I have her?” He taunts me, fixating his
smouldering brown eyes on my lips.
“Believe
me, you can. Have her as many times as you want but you will
never
touch
me again.”
“I
know you will give into me eventually. I’m going to make it so damn hard for
you to say no, you’ll be begging me to take you.”
He
sounds so certain and so sure of himself, it makes my blood boil. I want to
prove him wrong and I want to know I have the strength to resist him. If only I
could stop wanting him…
“You
will never have me and it’s going to make you go crazy. You will see my face
every single time you’re in bed with someone else and it’s going to drive you
mad.” I fume, fighting against the indescribable urge I have to punch him.
“Cole,
get the hell away from her. She doesn’t want to talk to you and I can’t say I
blame her.” Lisa adds, trying to act as a barrier between us.
He’s
having none of it of course and uses his strength to keep her back.
“We
aren’t over. We will never be over and you know it. You’re mine. You belong to
me.”
“I’m
not.” I tremble, shaking uncontrollably. “Not anymore.”
“You
can say that all you want, it still doesn’t make it true.”
“Why
would I want you when you’ve just had your hands over someone else? You think I
would ever let you touch me now?! You make me sick!”
Our
blazing row is being witnessed by a large audience as hundreds of students come
pouring out of school. They’re all watching us, intrigued and fearful about
what will happen next. I hate the idea of everyone knowing my private business
and realise that shouting back at Cole is not the answer. The best thing I can
do right now is walk away.
If
he will let me.
“I
know you still want me.” He whispers softly, tilting his head so he can speak
directly into my ear. “It’s written all over your face and I can practically smell
your arousal from here. I bet you’re wet for me already, aren’t you? Your face
is flushed and your heart is racing. You want my hands on you and there’s
nothing you can say or do that’s going to change that.”
“You’re
wrong.” I lie, trying to conceal my emotions from him.
“How
many times have you made yourself come this week? How many times have you
thought about me and pretended I was the one touching you?” He questions me,
breathing heavily against the sensitive skin on my neck.
“Stop
it.” I beg him, utterly humiliated that my best friend can still hear every
word of our conversation.
“You
can have the real thing, baby. There’s no need for you to imagine.”
He
trails his finger along the length of my jawline and moistens his lips, closing
the small space between us until my chest is pressed against his.
“Leave
me alone!” I cry, desperate to free myself from the unbearable hold he’s always
seemed to have on me.
“I
guess it’s going to take a bit more time for you to come to your senses.” He patronises
me, taking a step back. “And you won’t mind it when you see me with other
girls, will you? If you really mean what you say then it won’t bother you. I’m
free to do what I want now, or should I say
who
I want.”
His
voice sounds so cold and detached, I don’t even recognise him anymore. He knows
exactly what to say and how to hurt me the most, confident that his deliberate
and intentional provocation of me will make me crack.
“You
did that on purpose.” I murmur, staring at him in horror. “You wanted me to see
you with her and you enjoyed hurting me in the process.”
“I
promise you it will get worse. It won’t stop until you give in and accept the fact
that you and I are going to happen.” He assures me with certainty, refusing to
tear his eyes away from my own.
“Why
are you doing this to me?”
“Because
you’re mine and I going to do everything in my power to make you realise it. I
might have to screw a hundred women until you give into me but we both know
it’s going to happen.”
“That’s
enough.” Lisa interjects sternly. “Serena, let’s go.”
“You
can’t escape this, Green. I won’t let you.”
He
smirks at me once more, ignoring the large group of people who are watching us.
The majority of them are observing our row with a great deal of interest and
curiosity as they gossip amongst themselves. One voice can be heard above the
others and it has a masculine tone. I vaguely recognise it but wish I didn’t as
soon as I hear him make his next statement.
“I
knew she was a skank when she sent that photo of herself last year but she has
a smoking hot body. I’d give it to her all night long and she’d end up begging
me for more.”
I
cringe at the vulgarity of his words, utterly humiliated. I can’t believe the majority
of the school just heard what he said about me, meaning Cole heard it too.
He
inhales sharply, striding towards the idiot who is still laughing at my
expense. The culprit’s expression changes when he spots Cole heading towards
him.
“Serena,
get in the car. You don’t have to stay and watch this.” Lisa tells me, bustling
me back inside the car before she climbs in it herself.
It
only takes one blow for the guy who insulted me to fall down. Cole is above him
within seconds, pounding his fists against his face before a large circle of
students gather around them and obstruct my view.
“We
have to do something!” I cry, scrambling to unlock the car door so I can get
out.
“We
can’t! I don’t want either one of us involved in this and you can’t do anything
to stop it.” She replies calmly, emphasising the part about me being powerless
to prevent Cole from doing anything violent.
“But
he’s going to hurt him! How can I just leave them there without doing anything
to stop it?” I cry helplessly, staring at my friend in disbelief.
She
speeds out of the hectic car park as quick as lightning, forcing me to grab my
seatbelt in a hurry. She continues like this all the way home, refusing to slow
down and explain her reaction to me until we reach my house. She turns off the
car’s engine, turning around to face me in her seat.
“I’m
sorry about that.” She apologises sincerely. “I think I just panicked.”
“Panicked?!”
I shriek loudly. “You could have killed us, Lisa!”
“I
know I drove recklessly but I just wanted to get you out of there. God knows
what Cole is capable of when he’s in that frame of mind.”
“Cole
would never hurt me.” I assure her, staring out my window towards my house.
“He’s
already hurt you!” She reminds me. “Please don’t try and defend him.”
“I
meant physically. Cole would never hurt me like that.”
“How
am I supposed to know that?”
“Because
you should trust me.” I murmur softly, sighing heavily. “Look, I should go
inside. I need some time alone.”
“Serena,
tell me what’s going on. Please trust me.” She begs, placing her hand on my arm
so she can keep me from leaving.
“I
can’t.”
“Why
not?”
“Because
it’s… it’s something I can’t take back once I’ve said it.”
“He’s
making you keep quiet about it, isn’t he? He’s threatening you.” She states,
speaking boldly.
“No,
no he isn’t. I promise you.”
“So
tell me what’s going on. Don’t do this to yourself. You’re keeping something
from me and its making you unwell. I can’t even recognise my best friend
anymore. I don’t know where she is but she isn’t here. She isn’t you.”
I
glance across at her and notice the sadness in her eyes. She’s consumed by her
concern for me and I realise that I no longer have the strength to keep this to
myself. I’m overwhelmed by my misery and heartache, desperate to share my dark
secret with someone I trust.
“If
I do tell you then you have to swear to me that you will keep it to yourself.”
“Of
course I will.” She promises me kindly.
I
take a deep breath and close my eyes, struggling to form the words which will
no doubt change everything.
“Cole
is… he’s… he’s my half-brother.”
Silence
follows, heightening the intensity of the moment and my apprehension as I await
her reaction.
“
What
?”
“We
found out last week.” I confess. “He found out first.”
“But
how can he be?” She asks, trying to understand.
“We
share the same father.”
“Your
dad is Cole’s father?” She states incredulously.
“Yes.”
“My
God…” She sighs heavily. “What are you going to do?”
“I’ve
been trying my best to keep away from him but you can see how difficult that’s
been. He won’t give up on the idea of us being together and is making things
difficult for me by flaunting that girl in front of me. He’s doing it on
purpose.”
“That’s
crazy.
He’s
crazy if he thinks that you two can ever be together. It’s
sick and wrong.”
“Lisa,
you’re not helping and don’t say it’s sick when you don’t know anything about
it.”
“I’m
sorry. I’m so sorry.”
“I
don’t know what to do.” I admit, fighting back my tears. “I’m still in love
with him and I still want him. I can’t stand seeing him every day and I don’t
know how much longer I can say no to him.”
“You
have to. No matter what you can’t give into him, Serena. If he continues to
harass you then you’re going to have to tell someone.” She advises me firmly.
“Like
who?”
“I
don’t know… your mum?”
“I’m
not prepared to tell her anything.” I say decidedly.
“What
about the police?”
My
mouth falls open in shock, longing to take back my confession.
“Why
would I tell them?”
“I
just mean that you could always go to them if he won’t leave you alone. It
would be against the law for him to pursue a relationship and that’s exactly
what he’s doing. He would get into serious trouble if the police found out,
especially because of his criminal record. They might send him to prison and
then you would be free.”
“What
the hell are you talking about? Why are you saying this?” I demand, raising my
voice in anger and frustration.
“I’m
sorry. I know I’m making things worse it’s just… I don’t know what to tell you.
I’m trying to think of a solution but I can’t come up with anything. Cole
struggles with his temper and I’m seriously concerned about you after what he
said to you today. He’s dangerous.”
“Don’t
say that! You don’t know anything about him.”
“Serena,
don’t be angry with me. I’m just trying to help you.”
“You
can’t help me.” I reply sadly. “Nobody can.”
I
let myself out of her car and head towards my house, closing the front door
behind me as I crumple to the floor. My phone keeps on ringing but I ignore it,
refusing to answer Lisa’s calls or her text messages.
I
don’t know why I expected her to understand but I now see how foolish I’ve been
choosing to confide in her. What if she tells someone? What if she really goes
to the police or reveals everything to a member of staff at school? She just
doesn’t get it. She doesn’t understand how I feel about him or how much we’re
both suffering from being apart.
Just
because I’ve found out Cole is my half-brother doesn’t mean I see him as that.
Neither one of us were raised together as children or brought up to believe we had
a brother or sister. We didn’t even know about the other person’s existence
until last week.
Realising
that I can’t stay in the same spot all afternoon, I drag my tired body to its
feet. My mum isn’t home and I doubt she will be until tomorrow morning. It’s
Friday so I’m pretty sure she will have already made plans to go straight out
after work.
She’s
hardly spoke to me since I told my father to go back home last week. She was
furious with me when I told her I no longer had an interest in pursuing any sort
of relationship with him. Of course she doesn’t care about the fact that I will
have no contact with him, all she cares about is his money. He’s always handed
me a big wad of cash on the occasions when we’ve met up before and that’s the
only reason she even wanted me to connect with him again.
I
spend the rest of the night at home, curled up on the sofa in front of the TV.
I ended up switching my phone off because I was so sick of hearing it. Lisa’s
incessant phone calls were too much for me to handle and I knew I would end up
snapping at her if she continued.
At
midnight I decide to go to bed, immersing myself in a hot bubble bath before I
change into my pyjamas. The house is so quiet and its silence only helps to
remind me just how isolated I am. I feel like I have no one. No one I can trust
and no one who can help me. The whole world would be against me if I speak out
and tell the truth. The bulk of society would turn away and shun me for falling
in love with someone they regard as being wrong for me. None of them would care
about my feelings or how much it’s breaking my heart now that I’m separated
from him. All they would care about is biology and the DNA which Cole and I
share.