The Beginning of Us (47 page)

Sierra is out like a light. She’s tired from her eventful weekend. Me too. I got very little sleep hanging out with Garrett. And last night Whitney kept me up forever, telling me how I need to let this happen naturally and stop trying to control and overthink things. It was a marathon lecture that ended with me feeling worse than before it started.

I think I’ll try and turn in early tonight. I’m not sure if I really should call Garrett tonight. He asked me to call, but I’m not sure what to say about last night. I guess I should give him a brief call, since I said I would. I won’t keep him too long. I press send next to his name. He answers on the first ring.

“Hi, sweetheart, how was your day?” he asks. I tell him about my day. It feels familiar and comforting, having someone to tell about what Sierra and I have been up to. Jed used to call at night after Sierra went down to sleep and would want the rundown of what he missed.

I don’t feel any of the tension in the conversation that I would have expected, and I’m grateful that we can both move past it and remain friends. “How are you? Are you back on the road? I guess, I don’t know much about your tour schedule.” I’m curious where he’ll be, and when, or if, I’ll see him again. Truthfully, I’m still craving his touch and desperately want to be close to him, although, I’ll never admit it to anyone.

“I’m still in town. I’m here for the next few weeks doing some writing for the next album,” he says and I’m shocked! He’s never stayed around the bay area before that I know of. I’ve actually never heard of him being around town, except when he’s here for his show once or twice a year.

“Drew’s wife is going to pop any day now. We intentionally scheduled creative time, so that he could be home for Court and their baby.” He says as if reading my mind again.

“Is Drew in the band?” I don’t know much about the actual band, sad to say. I only know Garrett.

“Yeah, he’s the drummer.”

“Is the whole band from Tampa?” That would be odd, since he didn’t play with these guys when he lived here. He played the guitar without a band at that time.

“No, sweetheart, just me. Court’s parents live here, though, and she’s been staying with them because Drew didn’t want her home alone in Nashville being pregnant. He’s here in town to pick her up and take her back home. Maybe you can meet them before they leave? I’ll be staying here for a few weeks, even after they leave,” he says.

He’s staying here for a few weeks? Wow. So, does that mean I’ll get to see him? Will he
want
to see me?

“Lex, you there?”

I haven’t responded yet, but, shit, what do I say? Should I ask? “Yeah….Sorry….. I didn’t know you were still in town, or that you were planning to stay. That’s really nice, Garrett. I hope you’ll get the downtime you were hoping for.” I’m reclining on my bed, drinking a cup of chamomile tea. I made the tea hoping it would calm me. It’s not working. Not now, anyway. He’s still close to me.

He’s laughing. I don’t really know why, since I’m totally freaking out! “No, I’m hoping to be very busy. See, there’s this girl I know from college that I saw at the beach this weekend. She happens to live in this town. She means a lot to me, and the only thing I want to do right now is find out when I can see her. Rest and downtime aren’t even on my radar, right now. So…sweetheart, when can I see you?”

Oh my…pools of warmth have invaded my body. I’m nervous and anxious, but excited and hopeful at the same time. It’s emotional tug-o-war. 

“Whenever you want to, Garrett. I said I would make time for you. I meant it.” It’s not like he’ll be underfoot all the time. He’s a very busy man.

“Well, sweetheart, whenever I want is right now and first thing in the morning and all day every day. So you’re going to have to give me a few more guidelines.”

He’s insane, completely lost his mind. “Where are you staying?” I ask, wondering if he is close by, but that is doubtful since he’s likely at one of the five star resorts in South Tampa.

“At my parents’ house in Tampa. Actually their guest house. I’d rather be here and get home cooked meals than stay at a hotel and eat room service.” His parents live in Avila Golf & Country Club, and it’s only like 10 minutes from my house in Carrollwood Village.

“Garrett, do you want to come over tonight to talk? I know it’s getting late, but I’m not feeling very sleepy. I don’t have any coffee, but I do have tea.”

I hear him draw in a deep breath. “Yeah, sweetheart, I do. Don’t make anything. I’ll stop at Starbucks and get your favorite. I’ll see you in a half hour. Is that good?”

Oh my, yes. Maybe we can sort out what happened last night. I really need to do that before I can think about anything else. “Yes, please. I’ll text you my address. See you soon.”

Twenty seven minutes later he arrives, wearing loose fitting jeans that rest just above his hips and a solid black t-shirt that hugs his chest, shoulders, and arms. He’s in great shape. He must spend a lot of time at the gym. He’s carrying a tray with our drinks and a paper bag. I reach to help him with the tray, and he leans over to kiss my cheek.

“Thank you for the XO earlier in your text message. I needed that. That held me over until I could come and get the real thing. I wasn’t sure when you’d let me see you again.”

With a smile I reply. “We’ll work something out, Garrett.” Whenever he wants, is what I wanted to say, but even I know that’s not really how this will play out. However, being around him makes me feel safe and special, warm and tingly. I think that warm and tingly sensation is right between my thighs. Oh no! This cannot be happening. I gotta reign this in, or I’ll be taking my clothes off before the night is over. I don’t want to be just another notch in his belt. I want to be his friend, like the old days.

Garrett

Chapter 9

Shit…this girl has totally turned my world upside down. I can’t sleep. When she’s not beside me, I’m constantly checking my cell phone. Yesterday was an unbelievably great day, but last night took a turn when things got a bit too hot and heavy. I need to be careful.

I talked to Whitney today. She said Alexis is having a hard time feeling worthy of anything good in her life. This little lady has had a seriously hard life. and I’m ready for that shit to change. She’s amazing and deserves to sit on a throne and be pampered. Maybe I’ll buy her a throne.

Tonight she basically told me I could call her whenever I could fit her into my schedule. That pissed me off. At this point I would stomp on anyone who got between her and me talking. I really need to talk to her to see where her head is about us. Damn, she lost her husband last year, and I’m not sure she’s ready for what I want with her.

“Lex, we need to talk about what that means. Where should we sit?”

She points to the sliding glass door off the family room. It’s a beautiful house, not at all what I expected of her home. It’s not really girly, but there are lots of throw pillows on a big leather sectional sofa with a flat screen TV on the wall, stacks of books everywhere, and lots of family pictures around. This house isn’t like a museum. It’s a home, a well-loved and lived in home. I actually like it a lot, even with all the toys around.

She leads the way out to the lanai. Her backyard overlooks a big swimming pool. Beyond that is big pond. I wonder who helps her take care of this big house and yard. She’s got to be sitting on an acre of land at least. Huh. I want to ask and I need know, but I’m pretty sure that she wouldn’t like that right now.

“Thank you for inviting me over, Lex. I wasn’t expecting you to do that, but I sure am glad you did. I missed you today. I was dying to talk to you after last night. I’m sorry, again.” 

Her face is tense. I can see she’s holding on to what happened, but we need to get past this shit and on to whatever is possible with us. She’s so damn adorable. I love that she didn’t try to dress up for me. She’s wearing some short little sweat pants and a tank top. Her hair is in a messy bun on top of her head and she’s wearing the cutest little glasses. She’s kissable, so very kissable. It’s going to take every ounce of strength I can muster to keep my lips off her. 

“I wasn’t expecting you to want to be here, Garrett. Can you please stop apologizing for last night? That was my fault. I’m the one that’s sorry.”

I don’t want to keep bringing it up, but damn, I saw her face and I feel bad. Now I’m ready to move on to better topics.

“I was sure you’d have more important things to do, but, I’m happy you had the time to come over. I like chillaxin’ with you.”

That’s a funny word. “Chillaxin’…??? Sweetheart, what the hell does it mean to chillax, and tell me what I’m doing to chillax with you, so I can do it right. I love doing things you like. By the way, lady, nothing, and I do mean nothing, is more important to me than chillaxin with you!”

She giggles. I’m not sure there is a sweeter sound.

“It’s chilling out and relaxing. Exactly what we’re doing now. I like it a lot, only I usually don’t have time,” she explains.

I smirk at her. Shit! How can I make more time in the day. When I’m with her things are good, and I want to do more of it!

“Tell me what you do to fill your day. I want to know what it’s like to walk a day in your shoes,” I inquire, because I can only imagine how challenging it is to care for a child alone. Now that I see this big house and yard, I’m sure that takes up a good bit of time, too. Plus, I know she has some sort of job or work. She said she works from home. I’m not sure what she does, though. We never really got that far when we talked. I know for a fact she works out. No other woman in the world has a rocking body like she does, and that doesn’t come without hard work.

“Well, tomorrow for example, my day will start around 6:30 in the morning. I’ll get up, get ready, and take Sierra to school. When I get back I’ll go for a run, come home and do some work, pick Sierra up from school, come home and do some chores, cook dinner, enjoy some quality time with Sierra, go to bed, and then start all over the next day. Pretty simple, actually.”

Damn, that doesn’t sound simple. I thought my day was challenging. “That doesn’t sound so simple at all. What kind of work do you do?” I ask, curious as to how she can fit it in with all the other stuff.

“I’m a writer, or trying to be, so I usually spend my day writing my manuscripts and reading others. I like it. I haven’t published anything, yet. I’m not really ready for that, but I do love writing and reading. I’m not in a position to work a real job, since Sierra is still young and I want to be involved firsthand with what she is doing. Since Jed was responsible and prepared for the worst, Sierra and I are fine without my income.

“She’s lost so much, you know, me working a regular job and leaving her with a nanny doesn’t seem fair,” she explains. “Not to mention, I really never got around to getting a real job after college. Since I was getting married to Jed and he was working hard establishing his career, starting our family and building our home was my priority. So I’m not really sure who would even hire me now.”

Damn, I knew that girl would do something creative with her life. I’d love to get my hands on her books. “I have a lot of respect for you. Creative writing is an amazing talent. I don’t know many people that could commit to that. The sacrifices you’re making for your family are commendable. But it makes me happy that you’re pursuing something on your own, too. Crazy talent in that little body, lady.” She’s laughing. You have no idea how happy that makes me. “I’m sure publishing houses are lining up waiting for you. You’re a catch!” I tell her, leaning in closer to run my fingers across her arm, needing to touch her beautiful soft skin.

“Garrett, shut up, you don’t know if I am a catch in the literary world,” she says, laughing.

“Baby, you’re a catch in every world. And I know for a fact you’re smart as hell, because you used to read me some of those papers you wrote in college. You’re crazy smart, and you’d look great on the cover of any book!”

“Garrett, just shut up. You’re embarrassing me.” She’s cute when she starts blushing, but I don’t want her to stop talking, so I rub her leg just above her knee, telling her that I’ll stop talking about her being such a catch and hottie.

She shivers and gets goose bumps when my hand brushes the inside of her knee. “Are you cold, sweetheart? Want me to get you a blanket, or we could go inside?”

“No, I’m fine,” she says, but her face is very flush. We’re sitting on an outdoor sofa that faces the pool and pond. The moon is bright and lights up the backyard with the refection off the pool and pond. It’s warm outside.

“This is a really pretty house. You said you built it?” Her shoulders drop. She looks a little deflated.

“Yeah, Jed designed it. He was an architect. I basically gave him a list of all the things I would want in my perfect house and he tried to find a way to design it based on my wish list, with a lot of extras. At one point, I thought this house would be a family home. I wanted 3 children, so did Jed. We were just starting to think about our second child when the accident happened. But now that it’s just Sierra and me, it’s a lonely house. The dreams I had for us in this home seem like they may never come true. I’ve been thinking about selling it, but even that seems too hard to consider. I don’t know. Anyway, to answer your question, we designed it and had a contractor build it. We were involved in every detail, though. This house kind of feels like my first kid.” She looks so sad talking about the house, but it’s a feeling I understand. Some dreams you want so badly, but you just have no idea how in the world you’ll ever make them reality. That I understand all too well.

“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I know that’s not what you want to hear right now, but Lex, I really am sorry. I hoped you would always lead a charmed life. I hate that you’ve had such hard things to deal with in this last year or so. I want you to know I’m here for you. I mean…I want to be here for you, and help out with whatever you need. I don’t know if you have a go to guy in your life, but, baby doll, I want to be him.” She looks like she’s getting a little pissed. I’m not really sure what I said that was wrong, but I think I’m about to find out. She’s not really a quiet, keep it under the lid kind of girl.