The No-cry Sleep Solution (41 page)

Also, as your baby is waking up less to nurse or have a bottle, his diaper won’t get as wet.) When you do change a diaper, have all your supplies organized and close by so that you can do it quickly. And make certain you use a warm wipe on that sleepy bottom, since a cold, wet washcloth is a sure way to wake your baby up.

• I f you have windows that let evening or early morning light in, cover them up with something dark or opaque, like light-blocking blinds, thick curtains, or even a temporary
Mother-Speak

“I have always had this approach, simply because I am way too tired to change diapers, talk to the baby, or play with the baby at night. It works really well. In the last five years with my four children, I have only rarely been awake for long periods deep in the night with a baby. Many of my friends have this problem on a daily basis. But for me, even with night-waking twins, I am far better rested than they because my babies go back to sleep so quickly.”

Alice, mother of six-month-old twins Rebecca and Thomas

Review and Choose Sleep Solutions

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shield of cardboard. (Leave the covers off during daytime naps.)

• Keep activity toys out of the sleeping area. One stuffed animal or your baby’s lovey should be the only toy in his bed. When baby wakes during the night, you don’t want the notion of playtime entering his little mind. Like loveys and routines, the presence of toys is a cue—but of the wrong kind for this hour.

Develop Key Words as a Sleep Cue

This idea may help everyone.

You can condition your baby to know it is sleep time when you say certain words in a certain way. Begin now by deciding what your sleep-association words will be. The standard quiet sound of “shhh” is often helpful because it resembles the sound that your baby heard in the womb. Your key words can be something like a whispered “shhh, shhh, it’s OK, sleepy time.” Or “night night, shhh, shhh, night night.” Or, “Enough, already, just go to sleep!” (I’m obviously kidding on that one, although I remember distinctly saying that to Coleton one night.) An alternative to establishing key words is to quietly hum a special relaxing melody.

Once you decide on your key words, get your baby accustomed to them by saying them each time your baby is quiet, peaceful, and falling asleep. Once your baby is familiar with the words, use them to settle him at bedtime or if he wakes during the night.

How to Introduce Your Key Words

For the first few weeks, use your key words only when baby is actually falling asleep. You want your key words to be associated with her sleepy state.
Do not
use the key words when Baby is crying or unhappy, as
that
is what she will associate the words with.

Funny enough, I learned this from my dog trainer! Yes,
dog
trainer
. She says most people say, “No barking” when their dog

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The No-Cry Sleep Solution

Mother-Speak

“My husband, Royce, is now very familiar with using our key words, ‘shhh, shhh, time for night night’ when he goes to put Kyra back to sleep. Well, if he hears her cry on the baby monitor during the night, I’ll often hear him say, ‘shhh, shhh, time for night night.’ As if Kyra could hear him through the bedroom wall! Each morning I ask him what he was thinking, and he sincerely does not remember doing it.”

Leesa, mother of nine-month-old Kyra

is barking, so the dog thinks that “No barking” is an order to bark! She suggests saying it when the dog is in a quiet state so he associates the command with quiet. I heard something similar from motivational speaker Tony Robbins in a lecture on word association. He suggested repeating words such as “relax” when you are feeling relaxed, so that you can replicate your relaxed stage when you are in stressful situations. So, at first, use your key words when your baby is in a quiet, nearly asleep state. Later, when the association is made, you can use your key words to help him calm down and fall asleep.

Use Music or Sound as Sleep Cues

This idea may help everyone.

As a complement to—or instead of—the key words strategy, a soft lullaby music tape at nap- and bedtime when Baby is falling asleep may do. Indeed, recent research indicates that soft bedtime music causes many babies to relax and fall asleep more easily. Choose the bedtime music carefully, though. Some music (including jazz and some classical music) is too complex and stimulating. Pick simple, repetitive, predictable music, like traditional lullabies. Tapes created especially for putting babies to sleep are