The No-cry Sleep Solution (43 page)

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can gradually, and
lovingly
, help your baby learn to fall asleep without this very wonderful and powerful sleep aid.

Frequent Bottle-Feeding Babies

Your baby should be weaned from the need to have a bottle for sleep for a number of reasons. First, when your baby falls asleep with a bottle, the formula or juice might puddle in her mouth as she falls asleep and cause nursing bottle caries (cavities) syn-drome. (Although less of a risk, this can also happen with a breastfed baby who always sleeps while nursing.)

The second concern with using a bottle as a sleep aid is that your baby may not be hungry, but craves the sucking sensation to fall asleep. Therefore, she will be drinking more than she really needs.

The third issue is that it’s simply no fun to be preparing and serving bottles all night when you’d much rather be sleeping!

Should You Use a Pacifier?

The jury continues to be out on whether pacifier use is a good or a bad thing, but around 50 percent of parents do give their babies pacifiers, because they work so well to help a baby stay calm and relaxed. Generally, pacifier use from about three months of age to about age two is considered an acceptable practice. Prior to three months, pacifier use may interfere with the establishment of breastfeeding, and after age two, it may be associated with dental problems or speech delays. Within that middle age range,
Mother-Speak

“He does sleep with six binkies, but that doesn’t bother me because he sleeps all night long. We’ll wean him eventually, but for now I enjoy getting a full night’s sleep.”

Jennifer, mother of six-month-old Coby

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The No-Cry Sleep Solution

many parents are comfortable letting their baby sleep with a pacifier. If this is true in your family, and if your baby is easily comforted back to sleep by his pacifier, you may decide to use this as a self-soothing method.

Parents in this situation have reported to me that placing several pacifiers around the crib, and helping baby to find them in the middle of the night, effectively helps baby to go back to sleep without a parent’s intervention. (Always purchase safe, sturdy one-piece pacifiers, and never attach one to your baby or the crib in any way.) If you do choose this option, just keep in mind that, while some babies give up the pacifier on their own, sometime down the road you probably will be working to wean your baby from it.

If you decide that you’d rather eliminate your baby’s reliance on a pacifier (or if you’d like to give it a try) read on.

How to Diminish the Sucking-to-Sleep Association

When your baby wakes looking for his bottle, his pacifier, or to nurse, you most likely replace the pacifier or nurse him back to sleep. The problem here is that your baby’s strong sleep association most likely will not change without your help. (See Chapter 2.)

To take the steps to change your baby’s sleep association, you must complicate night wakings for a week or even a month, but in the long run you can wean your baby from using her pacifier, her bottle, or your breast as her only nighttime association. In other words, be prepared to disrupt your own nights for a while to make some important, worthwhile long-term changes.

Pantley’s Gentle Removal Plan

When your baby wakes, go ahead and pop his pacifier or his bottle in his mouth, or nurse him. But, instead of leaving him there and going back to bed, or letting him fall asleep at the breast, let him suck for a few minutes until his sucking slows and he is

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relaxed and sleepy. Then break the seal with your finger and gently remove the pacifier or nipple.

Often, especially at first, your baby then will startle and root for the nipple. Try to very gently hold his mouth closed with your finger under his chin, or apply pressure to his chin, just under his lip, at the same time rocking or swaying with him. (Use your key words if you have developed them.) If he struggles against this and roots for you or his pacifier or bottle, or fusses, go ahead and replace the nipple or pacifier, but repeat the removal process as often as necessary until he falls asleep.

How long between removals? Every baby is different, but about ten to sixty seconds between removals usually works. You also should watch your baby’s sucking action. If a baby is sucking strongly or swallowing regularly when feeding, wait a few minutes until he slows his pace. By paying attention to your baby’s swallowing you can also tell when you have had a letdown reflex.

You can try to get your baby to release at that time, but you’ll need to stop the flow of milk with your hand, or wait a minute for the flow to subside. Usually, after the initial burst of activity, your baby will slow to a more relaxed “fluttery” pace; this is a good time to begin your removal attempts.

It may take two to five (or even more) attempts, but eventually your baby will fall asleep without the pacifier or nipple in her
Mother-Speak

“We got to calling this the Big PPO (Pantley Pull-Off). At first Joshua would see it coming and grab my nipple tighter in anticipation—ouch! But you said to stick with it, and I did. Now he anticipates the PPO and actually lets go and turns and rolls over on his side to go to sleep! I am truly amazed.”