The No-cry Sleep Solution (45 page)

Review and Choose Sleep Solutions

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were in a crib down the hall. But you may feel that the reasons that you keep your baby in your bed outweigh the inconvenience of a few night wakings. Like you, I have chosen to breastfeed and co-sleep for many reasons that are important to me—and I’ve done it with all four of my babies. (If you haven’t already, I suggest you read
Attachment Parenting
by Katie Granju and Betsy Kennedy, Pocket Books, 1999. This is a lovely book that will help you understand and enjoy the choices you make in regard to where and how your baby sleeps.)

One important thing to remember is that “this too shall pass.”

All of my children eventually slept through the night, and your baby will too. However, there are ways that you can speed up the process of your baby sleeping all night—even while keeping your little one in bed with you.

Make sure that you’ve read the safety list in Chapter 1. Much of what I have read about the dangers associated with co-sleeping point to unsafe sleeping environments as the real issue. Read up on the topic and make a wise and informed decision, and religiously follow all safety measures.

Mother-Speak

“I am not ready to move Atticus out of my bed. I enjoy having him near me at night and snuggling with him. I slept with my daughter Gracie when she was a baby and she transitioned quite easily when we were both ready. Bedtime has always been a time of comfort for her and I feel that when the time is right for Atticus he will be much the same. Even so, it would be nice to have him waking up less often to nurse.”

Pam, mother of eleven-month-old Atticus and

five-year-old Gracie

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The No-Cry Sleep Solution

The challenge with breastfeeding and co-sleeping mother-baby pairs is that each partner is so in tune with the other that the slightest movement or noise will have both awake. Mommy and Daddy end up creating additional wakings in between the baby’s natural ones, thus creating an all night wake-sleep pattern.

The trick is to get Baby accustomed to sleeping beside you but able to go back to sleep without your help (typically in the form of nursing). You can do this by shortening your nighttime help routines. I know that this is possible because today my son Coleton is eighteen months old—still breastfeeding and co-sleeping—

and sleeping ten hours at night without a peep. This is the same baby that a few months ago woke up every hour or so to breastfeed. So I am living proof that you don’t have to give up a sleeping ritual that you love just to get some sleep. Not all babies will respond as Coleton did, of course. But many of my test mommies practice breastfeeding and co-sleeping, and many found their own sleep success without having to move their babies out of their beds. Some stubborn little ones do require a move to another room before they will give up the luxury of nighttime nursing, but do try all of my ideas for a few weeks before you assume this to be correct for your baby. (If you decide it’s time to move Baby out of your bed, you’ll find ideas for a gentle, peaceful transition in the section beginning on page 137.) When Baby wakes, you probably have a routine to get her back to sleep. For Coleton and me, it was breastfeeding. I used to nurse him until he was totally asleep; the nipple literally would fall out of his mouth. Every hour, we had a very exact pattern. Coleton woke, I shifted him to the other side, I kissed his head, he nursed—a beautiful, soothing ritual. Sometimes he would wake up and pucker up, looking for the kiss and the shift. As sweet as this ritual was, after twelve months of this hourly ceremony, I desperately needed a change.