You should finish an enema at least two to three hours before you plan to have anal sex. This time gives your body a chance to recover and allows the thin layer of mucous that lines and protects the rectum to regenerate. Plus, it prevents another potential situation. Sometimes, I believe I’m all done with my enema. I get dressed to run some errands. Inevitably, I wait on some impossibly long line at the post office or somewhere, and just as I get to the counter, I have an urge. Oh. My. God. My enema is so not over. This is what I call the “second wave” (the discovery that there was more in there), and the second wave can happen without warning. If the second wave happens in the middle of an anal sex date, then things are going to be messier than if you never had an enema in the first place. So give yourself plenty of time between enema and anal sex.
People with high blood pressure, heart problems, serious health conditions, or a compromised immune system should talk to a doctor before having an enema. Even if you’re in good health, it’s not a good idea to have enemas too frequently. They tend to stress out your rectum, and too much of this evacuation can throw your rectum, bowels, and gastrointestinal tract off balance. There is no agreed-upon frequency, but I will say this: once a day every day is too much, once a month is fine. Once a week or every two weeks is okay as long as it’s not every single week—give yourself some longer breaks. Do not overdo it on enemas. I don’t want to see any of you at an Enema Addicts Anonymous meeting! If, after an enema, you don’t have a bowel movement or expel any liquid, you could be dehydrated or have a serious condition. See a doctor immediately.
Enema Tips
• If you don’t trust your tap water (for example, if you wouldn’t drink it), use bottled distilled water, and warm it up before you fill the syringe or enema bag.
• Never use a vaginal douche in your rectum.
• Do not share enema equipment.
• Always clean your enema equipment carefully right after you use it.
• Read and follow all instructions that accompany enema kits or equipment.
One way to clean rubber or silicone enema bags, tubing, and nozzles is to wash them thoroughly with warm water and antibacterial soap or soak them in a soap and water solution, then rinse them several times with plain water. Make sure to dry all items completely, especially the bag, so no mold or mildew forms on surfaces.
There are differences of opinion when it comes to using bleach to clean enema equipment. Some people recommend soaking both rubber and silicone equipment in a diluted bleach solution (10 parts water, 1 part bleach) for about 20 minutes. Rinse all items, especially the bag, several times to make sure no bleach remains and dry them properly. Others caution that a thorough rinse is not enough, and some bleach will likely remain on the equipment. The next time you have an enema, this theory goes, that bleach will end up in your ass.
Because of gravity, there’s no chance that fecal matter can travel from your ass into the enema bag, so as long as the bag is rinsed out (even in only hot water) and properly dried, it will be fine. Bacteria and fecal matter from the ass can get on nozzles and even migrate from nozzles to tubing, so if you’re going to be anal retentive about cleaning, those are the items you should concentrate on. Whether you use a mild soap (and cotton swabs or pipe cleaners to make sure to get in nooks and crannies) or a bleach solution, the most important step is rinse, rinse, rinse.
Remember that rubber items are porous and can never be completely disinfected. Silicone isn’t porous, and can be disinfected with hot water
and antibacterial soap, although I still recommend that you never share enema equipment with another person. Nozzles made of other materials should be cleaned according to their specific instructions (Also see the guidelines for toy cleaning in chapter 8).
Inflatable nozzles require extra care when cleaning and storing. Heat, direct sunlight, dampness, and harsh chemicals will all degrade them and shorten their shelf life. Wash the nozzle and its connecting tube in warm water and a mild soap. Be especially careful not to get any water in the air tubes or the inflators since this will ruin them. Use a towel to dry off, making sure it’s completely dry, then dust it lightly with cornstarch and store it in a cool, dry, dark place.
Enema Ingredients
Some of you may have heard about oil enemas or various ingredients you can add to plain water enemas like soap, salt, or various herbal remedies. Any and all of these can irritate the lining of the rectum, which is very delicate. Any substance that you introduce into the rectum gets absorbed very quickly and goes directly into the bloodstream. It’s not the same as ingesting the exact substance because when we eat or drink something, it has the benefit of going through our stomachs and livers where it’s broken down before it enters the bloodstream.
I’m a purist when it comes to enemas. I believe that plain warm water does a fine job, and that the risks are too great for a negative reaction from adding other ingredients (except sea salt to balance electrolytes as previously discussed). I include the most popular kinds of enemas in this chapter for informational purposes, but I do not endorse them. I suggest you consult a health care professional before you do any kind of enema other than a plain water one.
Soap is probably the most common thing people add to an enema. While I see the logical connection between soap and cleaning, the point of an enema is to flush out fecal matter, not wash it like dirty feet. You should never use liquid antibacterial soap, body wash, or dishwashing detergent as they are too harsh; castile soap is the gentlest of all liquid soaps. Enema equipment retailers often carry castile soap and some enema practitioners extol the virtues of soap enemas. You should use only a few drops of soap in the water, and do several plain enemas after to rinse
thoroughly. No matter how mild the soap, it can still irritate the delicate tissue of the rectum, which is why I caution against it.
Oil has been used over the years for its laxative properties and can be helpful in relieving constipation or what Certified Colon Hydrotherapist Kristina Amelong calls “a sluggish colon.”
2
Vegetable oil, olive oil, castor oil, or mineral oil can stimulate the defecation process, but again, if you’re in good health and simply want to flush out your ass, you don’t need oil to do it. Besides an oil enema is a chore to clean up after.
Herbal remedies like chamomile, peppermint, fennel, aloe vera, lavender, and dozens of others are used in enemas for their various healing properties, to stimulate immune function, or to treat specific medical conditions. Just because these ingredients are natural doesn’t automatically mean they are safe. Consult a medical professional before using any of them orally or rectally.
Coffee enemas are said to have a detoxifying effect on the liver, gall bladder, and other organs, and some people swear by coffee enemas for good health. Be aware that coffee can also be an irritant, and because it contains caffeine, a stimulant. Like other ingredients, I don’t recommend it unless you’re under the supervision of a health care provider.
ASK THE ANAL ADVISOR:
Wild Weekend
Q:
I am visiting my lover for a four-day weekend, and, since we don’t see each other very often, we plan to have lots of sex, including plenty of anal penetration. I want to be clean for the entire time, so can I have an enema every day?
A:
Having an enema every day of your four-day romp will probably do more harm than good. Enemas stress out the body, and too many enemas in such a short period of time can disrupt the production of mucous to protect the rectum and definitely throw things off balance. Here’s my recommendation: have a nice-sized enema (with an enema bag or shower attachment) the night before you arrive. That should keep you cleaned out for several days, provided you eat a healthy diet and have regular bowel movements. By day three, if you want to clean again, do a rinse with a plastic bottle or bulb syringe—it will reassure you that you’re still clean, without overdoing it.
Alcohol enemas of any kind—wine, beer, or hard liquor—not only irritate rectal tissue like other substances, but are extremely dangerous. Because of the amazing absorptive quality of the rectum, putting something in your ass is like shooting it directly into your veins. It bypasses the stomach and liver, and goes straight to the bloodstream. Alcohol dehydrogenase (ADH), the enzyme that breaks down alcohol after you drink it, is present in the stomach and liver, but very little in the colon. Normally, alcohol is partially metabolized in the liver before it hits your bloodstream and you start feeling its effects. With an alcohol enema, not only are the effects felt almost immediately, but the amount of alcohol it takes to get you intoxicated is much less. In addition to making you sick, alcohol enemas, even when diluted with water, can lead to alcohol poisoning .
QUOTES
Dr. Jerry Glenn Knox,
Love Thine Enemas & Heal Thyself
(Vancouver, WA: Lifeknox Publishing, 2002), 15.
M. R. Strict,
Intimate Invasions: The Erotic Ins and Outs of Enema Play
(Oakland, CA: Greenery Press, 2004), 2.
CHAPTER 6
Safer Sex
Every sexual encounter we have with another person has its own physical and emotional risks, responsibilities, and rewards. While we may not be able to anticipate or guard against feelings or issues that arise from an erotic experience, we can protect our bodies from infection and disease. It’s important to know what STDs or sexually transmitted diseases (also known as STIs or sexually transmitted infections) are, how they are transmitted, and how to protect ourselves from them. I cover the most common STDs—human papillomavirus, genital herpes, chlamydia, gonorrhea, syphilis, hepatitis, and HIV/AIDS—in chapter 17. It’s equally important for you and your partner to get tested regularly for STDs regardless of your sexual orientation. Unless you and your partner are monogamous and have recently tested negative for all STDs, you may be at risk to give or get an STD. Practicing safer sex can decrease the chances of STD transmission.
It’s a good idea to practice safer sex if: you or your partner have an STD; you don’t know your own or your partner’s STD status; or you are not in a monogamous relationship with an STD-free partner. Here are some of the tools you can use to protect yourself and your partner.
ASK THE ANAL ADVISOR:
Rash from Her Ass
Q:
I recently started dating, well, fucking, somebody I’ve known for close to a year. She has been without a sexual partner for a long time, but she’s a serious hypochondriac about STDs; she was tested for everything twice in April, and once last month. She gets depo shots, so we fuck without condoms. So, how come I get a strange rash on my glans and foreskin, usually lasting for a day or two, when I fuck her in the ass? It doesn’t hurt and it basically just makes the regular bumps and pores looks bigger and red. There’s no funky smell or discharge either. I’ve studied the symptoms of about every friggin’ STD more than this girl has, plus I’ve been tested more than she has. It doesn’t look like any STD I’ve heard of.
A:
I know you think your lover is a hypochondriac, but I applaud both of you for getting tested often because most people do not. And it also sounds like you know a lot about STDs, which makes you more educated than the average guy on that subject. You may be having an allergic reaction to the lube you are using . Most lubes, whether water-based or silicone-based have similar ingredients, but they are not all the same. Personally, I got a red, itchy pussy from one particular brand of lube that I was trying out for the first time. I never used it again, and I haven’t had the symptoms again. So, try using a different brand of lube and see if that changes anything. You could also go to your doctor when you’re having symptoms to get a full examination and see what he or she has to say. It sounds like you know a lot about STDs, but it’s always better to be safe than sorry.
Putting a glove on your hand for rubbing and finger-fucking protects both you and your partner, especially if you have any cuts, scratches, or even torn cuticles, which can provide STDs direct access to your bloodstream. Gloves made of latex are the most popular and widely available, and latex is a good safer sex barrier. If, however, you are allergic or sensitive to latex, there are gloves made of other materials, including nitrile, vinyl, and neoprene. Powdered gloves make getting them on and off easier , but the powder can often irritate people’s skin; if your skin feels itchy or turns red and you know you’re not allergic to the glove material, find one that’s not powdered.
Gloves come in several different sizes, from extra small to extra large, and it’s important to find the right size for your hand. A glove that’s too small will cut off your circulation and have a greater risk of tearing. One that is too big gives the wearer less sensitivity, and can feel baggy and uncomfortable to the receptive partner. Besides being great for safer sex, gloves can also reassure you—if your nails are long or ragged, if you or your partner are squeamish about the cleanliness of anal penetration, or if you want to smooth out your fingers before they go inside your lover. When you wear a glove, always use plenty of lube to reduce friction and make penetration smoother.
Oral Sex Barriers
To protect you and your partner during oral-anal contact, you can use one of several safer sex barriers. The most popular is a latex dental dam. Originally designed for use by dentists (as the name indicates), dental dams are squares of latex that safer sex practitioners have co-opted for use as oral sex barriers. Because they were not developed with sex in mind, dental dams can be too small and too thick to make them ideal. Several companies—like Glyde, Slicks, Lixx, and Good Vibrations—have improved upon the dental dam, designing larger, thinner dams specifically for oral sex that do the job much better than their traditional counterparts. Hot Dam makes polyurethane dams for those allergic to latex. Some dams come scented or flavored, and most are available at better sex toy stores.