Until You Believe Me (20 page)

             
I received my paperwork and thanked the pleasant receptionist. I dialed Connor's number on my walk out to the car.

             
"How'd it go sweetheart? I've been impatiently waiting to hear from you." His voice was upbeat and slightly nervous.

             
"Well this is for real. We're really going to have a baby." I was surprised to hear him laugh.

             
"Were you really not sure?"

             
"I guess I was just waiting for confirmation."

             
"You ok baby?"

             
"Yeah, it's just still so new. I wanted kids, I have since I understood babies and where they come from. Really having a baby is much different than the thoughts of having the baby."

             
"I love you, this will be really good, I promise. I've been through the nervous phase, but I think I'm excited now," said Connor.

             
"Excited. That is not what I expected."

             
"I just get to thinking about hearing a laugh, hearing little feet running around the house, hearing a little voice calling for his or her daddy. I don't know, it's a little exciting. It's scary as hell, yes. But I'm excited."

             
As usual my heart melted. There was nothing about this man that wasn't adorable. Those thoughts stirred in my mind and sparked a small piece of excitement.

***

             
"This puts you at about 11 weeks 4 days. Based on the size and the dates you gave us for your last period it seems about right. Of course we give or take a few days but this is fairly accurate. Everything looks good, but at this point we just wait and see." Connor squeezed my hand gently as the woman wiped my stomach clean. She smiled politely at me and her eyes lingered slightly too long on Connor before she left the room.

             
I took a deep breath as I sat up.

             
"We have to do it Connor."

             
He gave me a slightly confused look. "Here? Really."

             
"What? God no. We've got to tell my mother. Twelve weeks is usually the end of the danger zone and we can't put it off forever."

             
"Have fun with that." Connor smiled as he held open the door to the ultrasound room and walked out.

             
"Connor, you're joking. I'm not doing it alone." I heard his laugh from behind me.

             
"I would never throw you to the tiger alone. Why don't you have her for dinner, we'll cook and you can break the news then."

             
"Ok. I guess that's a plan." Connor put his arm around me as we walked out to the car.

***

             
"Please sit down, you're making me nervous." Connor said as I paced around the kitchen.

             
"I'm so nervous. What is she going to say?"

             
"I have no clue, but here's the deal." He got to his feet and pulled me close to him. "I love you, and you love me. We already decided we wanted to live together. We've already decided we want to get married. We decided we wanted kids. We're just doing onestep out of order. It's not like we're committing a crime. We're bringing a baby into a happy and safe home." He kissed the top of my head and let me go.

             
"You're right. It could be worse. I still haven't told her about the job either. Maybe I'll soften the blow with that."

             
"Good idea sweetheart. Now I think I heard a car door, go get her at the door. I'll be cowering in the kitchen. If I don't see you again, remember I loved you very much." I heard his voice getting farther and farther away as he retreated to the kitchen.

             
I opened the door before my mother could even knock.

             
"Hey Ma, how are you?" I kissed her cheek and hugged her.

             
"Good, good. Things look great. I'm starving. I went out to lunch with Lydia, you know Uncle Jack's ex-wife's cousin. She looks good. She's getting a little chubby around the middle, but retirement agrees with her. Where is that handsome man? I brought him some of my ambrosia. He raved about it last time. Oh these floors look great with your furniture. My goodness, Madison. Hey Connor, you look great!" Her voice continued until it drifted far into the kitchen. She was an unrelenting storm of communication.

             
Connor had plastered a half scared and half fake smile on his face as she handed over the bowl. He thanked her graciously, sounding as smooth and genuine as he could.

             
"Ms. Branson, you'll looking wonderful. Here, have a seat right here. Can I get you a drink?" He turned on the charm as he glided across the kitchen filling mom's cup with sweet tea and getting her some bread to snack on.

             
"How's work Connor? You still killing them out there?"

             
"Yes ma'am. They've asked us to add three more projects on for the fall. We're extremely busy right now. I'm blessed." His eyes landed on me and he gave a small smile and wink. His smile gave me all the bravery I knew I was going to muster so I began.

             
"Uh Ma, I didn't tell you. I heard from the university the other day. Turns out Ben turned in my application for the Grad job, and they hired me for it. I have some orientation stuff in about 2 weeks and then I'll start in the fall." I smiled big, hoping the obnoxious smile would calm her for the next bit of news I was going to bestow on her.

             
"Oh Madison that's wonderful. I know you were thinking about applying. That little Ben is good people Madison. I swear. I was he wasn't so damn stubborn and would find himself a nice girl. He needs to stop messing around with such trampy girls. I ran into him a few nights ago. I went out to eat with Sheila and good lord Madison, I swear I could see just about everything on that girl."

             
I couldn't help but laugh. It sounded exactly like a woman he would be with. I also felt much more relaxed and needed to spit it out before I lost my nerve.

             
"Mom, I'm pregnant." I jumped at the sound of the pot crashing to the floor. Connor looked up, red-faced.

             
"I've been here what? Twenty minutes? I could tell from the moment you opened the door. About damn time you put it out in the open."

             
I let out the breath I had been holding. What? She knew?

             
"How?"

             
"Honey, let me give you some advice. Mom's know everything. Remember that. When you're little one gets to be older and acting grown up and you think something is up, it usually is. Are you happy about it?" She lowered her head, looking over the tops of her glasses, first at me and then at Connor.

             
"I think we are now. It was quite a shock at first, but we've gotten used to the idea." I spoke for both of us.

             
"What about you handsome? I mean you're sticking around since you knocked my little girl up, right?"

             
"Ma! Knock it off!" I said exasperated. I looked quickly at Connor and I had never seen him quite that shade of red before. His eyes were huge, like a deer in headlights.

             
"Yes ma'am, of course. I love your daughter more than anything."

             
"Oh stop it, I'm just kidding. I'm happy for you both." She hopped off her stool and gave me a big hug followed by hugging Connor. "If this is a good thing for both of you then I am fine. Worse things could happen. I've gotten a lot of perspective the past couple of months." I knew she was referring to the incident. Connor talked quite candidly to me about not knowing how I was going to recover, or if I would.

             
"What does that mean for a wedding?" My mother asked.

             
I looked at Connor before I spoke. "I don't really know, I guess we haven't gotten that far yet."

             
"A little one will change your whole world. I'd be thinking about it pretty soon." My mother said as she put a bite of lasagna in her mouth that Connor had cut for her.

             
We ate and talked and laughed. Finally my mother announced she was going to head home. I hugged her tight and walked her to the door.

             
"You're going to be a good mom Maddie darling. Don't worry about that. You've got yourself a good man. He looks at you like you are the sun of his world. Don't let him go. He will take care of the two of you."

             
"I don't plan on it. I love him, Ma. More than anything I want to be with him. I wouldn't survive this without him. I wouldn't have survived any of this without him."

             
"I know darling. Take care of yourself and my grandchild. Nothing can happen to any of you." She rested her hand on my stomach, though nothing was there.

             
I closed the door behind her and watched out the window until she pulled out onto the street. Connor was sitting on the couch in the living room. His eyes were on me and he was smiling.

             
"Come sit." I walked over to him and sat next to him on the couch.

             
"Your mom was a pleasant surprise huh?"

             
"For sure. That was almost too easy."

             
"She was right though, it's only going to turn our lives upside down when the baby comes. What do you want to do about a wedding?"

             
I hadn't even begun thinking about it before this, and now I was expected to make a decision in the near future.

             
"I don't really know what I think. I understand everything will change in the future, but do we want to do it now, just to do it?"

             
"I'd be happy marrying you tonight if you agreed. I don't care if it was today, or next week or after the baby. Marrying you is all I want to get to do."

             
I could feel the blush creeping into my cheeks. How did I feel about this? I was never the fairytale wedding kind of girl. I don't like attention, and in reality a wedding was all about the bride. I didn't care about getting married before the baby. At this point it would be clear that's what we were doing, but I was going to marry Connor one day.

             
"Maybe we should just do it. Just get married, it would make life simpler in the future."

             
"It's heaven to hear you talk about marrying me. Let's put it off just so we can talk about it longer." He smiled his bright smile and held my hand.

             
"We've got about two months until you're supposed to be back to work full-time. Is that enough time?" Connor asked, his eyes still lit up.

             
"I don't know, I've never gotten married. I don't want anything elaborate. I just want you and some family. Something simple and small, so I guess that's enough time." I shrugged. I wasn't fussy about things like this.

             
"Two months until I get to marry you. Even more so, two months until the honeymoon, now that is an incredible thought." Connor smiled mischievously and picked me up from the couch and walked me down the hall toward the bedroom.

Chapter 25

             
"We were quite pleased with your application Ms. Branson. We're very glad that we got to hire from within the university. I want to begin with saying how very sorry I am to have heard about the altercation that took place inside of the new facilities. I hope that you are well now?" Her voice was almost robotic due to her formality.