Authors: Courtney Noel
Chapter 47: <-- Breaking
My parents sat me down on the couch.
“Honey, you might have to prepare yourself,” my mom said.
“For what?”
“Well, if this stalking continues, we have decided to file a restraining order against Henry,” dad said to me. Tears sting my eyes right away.
“A restraining order?”
“Yes. If his stalking continues we need to take this to the next level. We need to keep you as safe as possible,” mommy said while looking at dad.
“Would I have to go to court?”
“If he fights it, yes. Which, he probably will because having a restraining order against you isn’t the best thing on a college application,” dad says. “Especially if it’s right before he goes to apply for a college.” The room spins and tears streamed down my cheeks.
Chapter 48
: Healing -->
When we get back to the hotel, I slide into my pajamas then into bed to watch
Say Yes to the Dress
. I know it’s corny, but I am like obsessed with this show. I record all the new ones on my DVR.
“Kade, go get ice please,” mom demands. He sighs, and gets up off the couch.
“Anything to not watch this stupid show,” he responds, sending a wink my way. I pretend to be offended. Things feel amazing between us.
We opened up presents tonight. That’s how my mom’s side does things. We open up presents on Christmas Eve. Then on Christmas day we go to my dad’s side and open up presents from them. I know what you’re thinking. Christmas isn’t just about the presents. We know that. However, our family does plan thing around presents, because we want the people we love to open their presents. Sounds terrible, right? Anyways, so I got tons of cute clothes and gift cards to my favorite stores like, PacSun, Tilly’s, and Macy’s. Oh, and as a joke my aunt got me a gift card to Build a Bear. Like, I know it’s dorky, but I absolutely am obsessed with stuffed animals and Build a Bear, and I’m seventeen. Kade got tons of clothes too, and a new pair of Vans which are desperately needed. He also got new headphones because his are old. Thankfully, Kade and I don’t really ask for super expensive things. That’s good for our family. However, when we got into high school, mom and dad bought us both new laptops. So ever since then, we haven’t really asked for anything big.
“Becca, go see what’s taking Kade so long. Maybe he needs some help,” mom instructs me. This is another chance to kiss Kade, so I don’t debate with my mom and decide to go see Kade out in the hall. I walk out of the hotel room, letting the door shut and lock behind me. I walk down the hall and turn the corner. I hear faint talking. Is someone talking to Kade? Nah, Kade hates strangers, why would someone want to talk to him?
“No, you can’t tell mom,” I hear him mumble to someone. “She’ll never forgive you.” He’s silent for a minute. I stay behind the corner, not wanting to interrupt.
“Well, it’s your call.” He sighs. “You fucked up. I cannot believe you,” he uses the same tone he uses when he’s pissed at me. Who is he talking to? His brother? It’s definitely not his sister. He would tell me. Then it’s silent. I hear ice come down from the vending machine and I decide it’s safe for me to come out into his sight.
“Hey, what’s taking so long?” I come around the corner. He’s carrying a big bag of ice.
“Nothing,” he says. He leans in and strokes my lips with his and cups my chin with his palm. My mind goes all blank and I am on like cloud 37. The world stops. It’s just us that matters. No Henry, no parents, no Destiny. Just us. I finally forget Henry for those two seconds, and that’s when I know. I bet I will only feel this feeling with one person. It’s Kade. I’m in love with him. He makes me forget Henry, and I’m positive that’s what love is. Then he pulls away, turns around and doesn’t say another word. I stand there frozen until I hear him open the door to our hotel room. What just happened?
**
On the drive home a few days later, he doesn’t say a word to me. Doesn’t even look at me. What changed? I thought we had an amazing weekend, probably the best Christmas ever. Did I make him mad? Was it that phone call? Who was he talking to? Whether I did, or didn’t do something, he’s ignoring me, like I don’t exist, and we didn’t kiss. It hurts. Badly.
**
School goes on. Nothing. It’s our first day back from Christmas break and he still hasn’t said anything to me. Nothing. He’s sees me at school, I know that. I catch him watching me, but he still doesn’t say something.
**
We are sitting at the bar stool doing homework. I’m doing Calculus and he’s doing Economics, when someone unlocks our front door from the outside and lets there self in. How is that possible? Dad is working in our home office and mom is right here cooking dinner. Kade and I are sitting at the bar doing homework. Who else could have a key?
“Cynthia? What are you doing here?” I hear my dad ask someone. Obviously it’s Cynthia. I look over at Kade, who has his face buried in his hands. I get up from my stool and run toward the front door and jump in Cynthia’s arms.
“What are you doing here?” Tears are streaming down my cheeks and I know they are on her’s too. Cynthia has always been a crier.
“I need to talk to everyone,” she mumbles. The way she says it makes me insanely nervous. Is it bad? Is Rey okay? She lets go of me, which is so unlike her, and heads to the living room. She gives my mom a big hug and begins to sob. Mom leads her to the couch and makes her sit down. Kade and I sit beside her on the couch, while mom sits in her rocking chair and dad stands beside the fireplace. We’re sitting in our usual spots, like nothing has changed, but everything has. The vibe I’m getting from Cynthia isn’t her usual loving, comforting one. I’m sitting next to the love of my life, not my childhood crush.
“So, we kind of have something to take care of,” she announces to all of us. “Destiny has contacted me, which is why I am back.” My eyes go wide and I think I’m not breathing. So she’s back? For good? My heart races from excitement and relief. Kade takes my hand. Feeling courageous, I intertwine my fingers with his, not fucking caring who’s looking. We’re in this together.
“Where is she? Is she okay?” My mom asks eagerly awaiting Cynthia’s answers. I look over at Kade to see if he’s excited. He isn’t. He’s frozen and his face is emotionless.
“She has contacted me for a specific reason, though,” Cynthia continues. It feels as if we all lean toward her, dying to know why Destiny all of a sudden contacted her parents. “Destiny is six months pregnant,” she tells us. We all go silent, except for Kade, who begins to cry really hard. I take him in my arms, and surprisingly, he lets me. He cries on my shoulder and I have both arms hugging him. Cynthia raises her eyebrows. I give her a look back saying “Not today. We will explain later. Let’s focus on Destiny, right now.” I don’t really want to focus on Destiny, either, though. I’m in just as much pain as Kade, but I have to be here for him right now. It’s my turn to hold him and be strong. I want to be his hero.
“So, of course, me being her mother, I told her we would throw her a baby shower.” My jaw obviously drops and Kade starts to yell. Oh my god. A baby shower? Is she fucking kidding me? After all these months we have suffered and Destiny just goes out and gets knocked up then Cynthia wants to plan her a baby shower!? Is she fucking crazy!? Is she not thinking at all?
“Are you kidding me!? She left us, Mom!” He gets up from the couch, pulling me by the hand and leads us upstairs quickly. I just hear Cynthia sigh. Kade takes me into his room and lays me down. He lies down beside me and rubs my head. His crying stops right when mine begins. So the only fucking reason Destiny came back to us was because she needs help raising her stupid baby. She needs help and she needs money. That’s it. She’s using us. I cry harder. How could she? She left us, her family, and she left me. I am practically family to her. She always would call me her little sister. Then she leaves us and goes off and gets pregnant. It hurts, and if it hurts me, I know it must hurt Kade, which makes it even worse. So I cuddle up to Kade, not caring about if we are an item or not, or whatever people like to call it. I just hold him in my arms, because it feels right, and there is nothing wrong with that.
**
We are throwing a baby shower for Destiny and her new baby this Friday night. Kade and I are assigned to make cupcakes. Cynthia is making tamales, and mom is going to make sure Destiny doesn’t have to do anything. After Kade and I make cupcakes Thursday night, we have to go to the clubhouse and hang decorations Friday morning. Or should I say I have to put up decorations while he sits and watches. Kade doesn’t really have an artistic side. Hard to believe, right? (That’s sarcasm, you may laugh.)
Kade still lives with us even though Cynthia and Rey are back, which makes me happy. They say he will just live with us until we go off to college because it will just be easier. They don’t want him moving around so much. It’s almost February and it would throw Kade’s schoolwork off if he has to focus on moving his things to another place.
Kade has basically been silent this whole week. He looks at me at school and makes eye contact, but won’t say a word. I can see in his eyes that he’s breaking completely. I try not to take it personally, because I know it’s not me. He’s in so much pain he doesn’t have time to think about his complicated mess with me. He has to focus on accepting the fact that soon he will have a niece or a nephew. He’ll have to talk to me tonight, though. We have a cupcake date. Well, I have a cupcake date with myself and he has a dinner full of cupcakes planned.
I get home from school with tons of homework assigned for this weekend, and pull my hair up in a messy bun. I run upstairs and change into comfy sweats that I don’t mind getting cake batter and frosting on. Cynthia wants some vanilla and some chocolate. She also went out and bought me “It’s a Girl!” cupcake liners. Yes, Destiny’s baby is a girl. She also said on the vanilla cupcakes, she wants pink frosting. So Kade is supposed to be going to the store and getting me food coloring right now. Mom and Cynthia are at the clubhouse putting up all the tables and chairs with Rey and dad is on a business trip. However, he’s supposed to be back tomorrow morning just in time for the shower. No one knows about Kade and I, yet. No one knows that we kissed because we really aren’t a “thing” yet.
The front door opens then slams shut.
“I couldn’t find just individual pink food colorings so I had to buy the whole rainbow,” Kade says as he walks down the hall and enters the kitchen. I’m already getting out the big cake mixer and ingredients I need for homemade cupcakes. My laptop is open to this recipe I found, which has some awesome reviews. I put the glass bowl on the island counter and crack the eggs, poor the milk, and whisk it together. Kade comes up from behind me and wraps his arms around my waist and kisses my cheek.
“Do I get to lick the bowl?” He whispers in my ear as I poor the Vanilla extract in the mixture. His warm breath makes my heart tingle. I then put the flour, coco powder, and baking soda in the mixture.
“Chocolate or vanilla first?” Kade asks, letting go of my hips.
“Chocolate. Thus, the coco powder,” I giggle. He kisses my shoulder. I decide to go for it, so I put the baking spoon down and turn around to face him.
“What are we, Kade?” I hate to be those stupid girls that have to know if they’re dating their guy or in an actual relationship, but I’ve gotta know.
“I don’t know; what are we?” He asks playfully.
“I asked you first,” I challenge.
“I think I want you all to myself,” he says as he smooths my hair. I nod and kiss him slightly on the lips. So, yup, I guess it’s official. I couldn’t be happier.
His smile fades. “Are you nervous?” He asks as I put the batter in the pan.
“Yeah,” I say honestly.
“Why?”
“I haven’t seen her in like a year, Kade,” I tell him. “What if she doesn’t recognize me?”
“Yeah, well I have to meet the guy that knocked up my sister,” he says. I wince. I let go of the pan and turn around to wrap my arms around him.
“It’ll be okay. It always is,” I whisper to him. He looks me in the eyes and it practically makes my heart shatter. I can see so much pain and sadness. He is hurting so much inside. His twenty-two year old sister is pregnant. There are probably so many questions he wants answered running through his mind. I just want to make all his pain go away. He puts his hands on my cheeks and kisses me.
**
Once all the cupcakes are out of the oven, I decide to go to bed. Kade is asleep on the couch, and I let him stay there. He needs the sleep, I don’t think he’s gotten any since he found out Destiny is pregnant.
**
The next day, Kade and I are home from school getting ready for tonight.
“Holy shit, I’m nervous,” I say as I run from his room to mine. He’s wearing jeans, a button down shirt, and a tie. He looks hot. He has a little scruff on his cheeks, and I can’t resist wanting to kiss those cute cheeks. Plus, I love him in ties. The tie is black and his shirt is baby blue.
“What are you gonna wear?” He looks me up and down as he leans his hip against my bedroom door frame. “I hope not that.” He’s making fun of my yoga pants and Coca Cola sweatshirt I wore to school. It was a comfy day today and I do not have a problem with that!