Anna's Courage (Rose Island Book 1) (19 page)

“Good boy,” I said, my voice tender.

Tonight, the house would be excruciatingly quiet. Maybe I should drive over to my in-laws and convince Travis to come home. He’d probably disown me if I did that because he was looking forward to Grandpa Walter driving him to school in the Corvette. Plus, Luella would ask all about the date, and I didn’t want to talk about that tonight.

I slid my key into the mailbox and opened it to find nothing but advertisements. Gone were the days when receiving mail was exciting. Now the majority of my mail went straight into the recycling bin.

On my way home, I glanced up at the Petersons’ house and saw Nick standing on the upstairs balcony with Gabby and Hailey. The baby pointed a chubby finger at the moon, and Nick said something, causing both girls to giggle. The sweet sound danced through the quiet night, tugging at my heart.

I stood close enough that I could’ve called out to them. Instead, I remained silent, not wanting to disrupt their gentle moment. Yoda pulled on the leash, and regretfully, I allowed him to lead me home.

I had a feeling it was going to take several more dates with Mitch before I forgot about Nick and those precious girls.

Like going back to college when you really wanted to fly helicopters, Mitch was second choice.

And when it came to love, second choice was miles behind first.

*

Every few months,
the
Morgan
Spinsters—
as Bianca had recently taken to calling Jillian, Vicki, me, and herself—convened at The Blue Crab to scrapbook late into the night. Usually, the boys stayed with their grandparents. That Friday night, however, Walter and Luella’s salsa dancing club had an event, so the disappointed cousins were stuck hanging out with the women.

Our evening began as it always did by strolling along the beach to the pier for dinner at the Pelican Pub. Matt, Drew, and Travis complained endlessly about walking to dinner.

“You have to understand,” Drew said. “For us guys, scrapbooking night is all about drinking soda, eating pizza, and watching John Wayne movies with Grandpa out in the barn. We’re just not used to this walking along the beach at sunset stuff.”

“Don’t forget the burping contest,” Travis added.

Jillian sighed. “We don’t like this arrangement any more than you do, but there’s nothing we can do about it, so let’s make the most of it, okay?”

Matt threw the ball down the beach for Yoda. “I don’t see why I couldn’t stay by myself. I’m fifteen, you know.”

“I know,” Jillian conceded, “but you’re grounded, so think of this as part of your punishment.”

He let out a disgusted huff and marched ahead.

“What’d he do to get grounded?” Travis asked once Matt was out of earshot.

Drew shook his head. “Dude, you do not want to ask that question. Come on. I’ll race you.”

Drew ran down the beach with Travis following him. They caught up to Matt, who again threw the ball for Yoda, and all three boys raced ahead.

I slipped off my shoes and walked down to the water. The others did the same, and Bianca asked what Matt had done to get grounded.

Jillian shook her head with disgust. “He had his girlfriend over to the house after I specifically said she couldn’t be there when I was gone. Then he gave me all kinds of trouble about having to video chat with his father after we arranged a time that would be most convenient for Matt.”

“Was Keith mad about that?” Bianca asked.

Pain encompassed Jillian’s face as it often did at the mention of her ex-husband. “He wasn’t happy, that’s for sure.”

“So, when will Keith be back?” Bianca asked.

“The unit is supposed to return sometime this spring, but the army is unpredictable, so who knows.”

Bianca bent over to pick up a shell. “Did Keith—”

“Can you please stop asking about him?” Jillian said, suddenly irritated. “Last week, I told you I don’t want to talk about him, but you’re constantly inventing reasons to say his name.”

“I can’t even ask—”

“No,” Jillian snapped. “You can’t. Vicki, Anna, and even Mom and Dad finally understand it’s over, but you keep pestering me about him.”

Tension filled the air, and Bianca, not one to be pushed around by anybody, let alone her older sister, responded sarcastically. “
Sorry,
excuse me for asking about Keith. Excuse me for being interested in your life. I suppose I’m only allowed to ask about
Bryan
, your wonderful new and exciting boyfriend.”

Jillian ground her teeth. “Stop talking, okay? Just stop talking!”

Angry silence soured the previously carefree mood. A group of brown pelicans soared overhead, briefly blocking the fading sunlight and casting a dark shadow along the beach.

“Are you okay?” I asked.

Jillian heaved a deep sigh. “Yesterday, Keith’s mom sent me a newspaper article for the boys. I shouldn’t have read it, but I did, and he sounded like the most amazing, selfless, heroic man in the world.”

Her voice cracked, but she cleared her throat and continued. “All that may be true, but he doesn’t love me anymore. He doesn’t want to be with me, and that hurts. We’re divorced, and I don’t want to talk about him as if everything is perfectly fine.”

I placed a hand on Jillian’s shoulder and gave Bianca a pointed look. “We won’t talk about him anymore.”

Jillian nodded. “I know y’all don’t like
Boring Bryan,
as you call him behind my back—”

“I like him,” I insisted, wanting to soothe her pain. “He was very nice when we went out last night, and I enjoyed getting to know him better.”

She was quiet as she studied me carefully. “You really like Bryan?”

“I do,” I insisted.

“What if I told you Keith called last night, and he wants to get back together? He’s sorry for everything he put me through, and he promised to go to counseling and AA. He said he still loves me—”

“Is that true?” Hope exploded inside me. “Did he really call?”

Jillian gave an ironic snort and shook her head. “No, but that’s my point. Even you, Anna, won’t accept the fact I’m with Bryan now. It’s over between Keith and me, so can we just move on?”

Shame settled in the pit of my stomach. Maybe I didn’t complain about Boring Bryan like Bianca and Vicki, but deep down, I continued holding out hope for Jillian and Keith. Deep down, I wanted nothing more than to see them back together.

“I’m sorry,” I said, regretfully. “You’re right.”

Bianca skipped a shell across the surface of the ocean. “I’m sorry, too. But just so you know, I don’t see you and Bryan staying together forever.”

“Well, that’s not really your concern, is it?” Jillian shot back.

Bianca shrugged and nobody spoke for awhile as we continued down the beach. I hated when my sisters-in-law fought, but over time, I’d come to realize their arguments never lasted very long. Regardless of the insensitive things they said to one another, they really did love each other and were quick to forgive.

As the Pelican Pub came into view, Jillian broke the strained silence. “Maybe Bryan’s not the most exciting person in the world, but he’s nice. He treats me well, and he’s—”

“He’s safe,” I said.

She grimaced at first, but then she relaxed as if coming to peace with my observation. “I suppose you’re right. Bryan is very safe.”

“It’s not a bad thing,” I insisted. After all, I’d used the same word to describe going to college instead of flying.

And choosing Mitch over Nick.

There was nothing wrong with safe, was there?

*

At the Pelican
Pub, we ate dinner outside on the sandy, wooden deck underneath heat lamps and colorful Christmas lights. As I dipped a chip in salsa, Matt proudly emitted a loud, obnoxious burp. Jillian scolded her oldest son and gave both Drew and Travis a stern look for laughing.

Vicki shook her head. “Boys are so disgusting. I can’t believe neither one of you gave me a sweet—”

She stopped talking and stared directly at her oldest sister. “I’m sorry, Jillian. I didn’t mean to say that.”

Although Jillian’s face paled, she waved a dismissive hand. “Don’t worry about it.”

A moment of silence followed, and I thought about the unborn baby girl Jillian and Keith had lost. The late-term miscarriage, coming so soon after Marcus’s death, had been difficult on Jillian, dragging her into a deep depression that she still struggled with.

“Girls aren’t always sweet,” Matt mumbled. “Grandma said you three used to fight all the time. And I’m pretty sure you’re kind of fighting tonight.”

Bianca gave a sly smile. “Did Grandma ever tell you about
The Great Parachute Pants War of 1989?
How your mother borrowed my favorite pants and ruined them with grape soda?”

“That was an accident,” Jillian said, pretending to be offended. “I can’t believe you’re still upset about it.”

“I
loved
those pants.”

“I guess so.” Jillian laughed, and as everyone else joined in, the tension eased. Through the rest of dinner, the Morgan sisters joked and told stories about growing up together. I was a little envious I didn’t have siblings, but I’d enjoyed a happy childhood and a close relationship with my parents.

As the Christmas lights above us twinkled in the darkness, a sense of peace enveloped me. I was grateful for the beautiful island, my in-laws, and gorgeous nephews. If I had to be a widow, this wasn’t a bad way to do it.

How could I think about jeopardizing my happiness for Nick or any other man with aspirations to leave the island? When Mitch asked me out, I wouldn’t hesitate. And I definitely wouldn’t think about Nick. No, starting tonight, I’d begin flossing twice a day in preparation for my new relationship.

After dinner, we walked back in the dark, using the flashlights on our phones to spot hermit crabs skittering across the beach. When the boys were little, we used to bring buckets to collect crabs and seashells at night, but nobody wanted to do that anymore.

About halfway home, I saw Nick, Hailey, Gabby, and all three puppies standing near the water. My heart spun at the sight of them. Yoda broke free and raced toward his siblings. I envied the dog’s ability to express his emotions without reservation, then I laughed at my pathetic self for envying a dog.

“Hey,” Nick said, smiling.

“Hey,” I replied, purposely avoiding his gaze.

Bianca gushed over the puppies. “Anna, you should think about getting another dog for Yoda. I bet he’d love to have someone to play with.”

I shook my head. “He has Travis and Felix, so no thank you. I’m happy enough with one puppy and one cat.”

“Are you?” Nick asked, staring at me intently. “Are you really happy with Yoda?”

I nodded. Although I’d never been a dog person before, the mutt had wiggled his way into my life.

Nick bounced a cranky Gabby in his arms. “I thought she was down for the night, but she woke up crying. Hailey and I hoped looking at the boats on the water would make her feel better, but I don’t think it’s working. I’m afraid she might have another ear infection.”

“Poor angel,” Bianca said, reaching for Gabby. The baby batted her away and gave a resounding, “No!”

Bianca laughed. “It doesn’t take them very long to learn that word, does it?”

We walked back to the cottage together, pointing out all the Christmas lights and discussing holiday traditions. I’d always enjoyed how the island’s residents decorated the wild rose bushes growing along the beach with ornaments and thick garland.

Nick saw us safely to The Blue Crab before taking the dogs and his nieces home. I watched him go, feeling a sense of longing and desire that was downright embarrassing.

Standing behind me, Bianca called out in a singsong voice not quite loud enough for Nick to hear. “Good night, my love!”

“Hush,” I told her.

Nick turned around. “What’d you say?”

Bianca started to speak, but I jabbed her. “She said good night. Have a good night, and we’ll see you later.”

Nick gave a slow, easy smile, making me realize he’d heard exactly what Bianca said. Shuddering, I quickly turned away.

Inside the house, the boys established Video Game Haven in the living room while the women set up our scrapbooking supplies in the kitchen.