Falling (11 page)

“You okay?” I ask as he runs his hand through his dripping hair.

“Yeah. I meant to say, ‘Take your top off.’” He stops. “No, not like that, just the top layer, then you won't get so cold.” He cringes. “It sounded a lot less perverted in my head.”

I just laugh, reaching back into the basket for my brownie.

We pull up outside his house after driving for a lot less than an hour. “How did that happen?” I turn around to look down the street. “Did we go past my school?”

“Nah, I came in the other way. That way we didn't have to go through the city.”

“Huh.” That was unexpected. I cringe at what I’m about to say and it’s something I never thought I'd have to, “I'm really wet and cold. I just want a shower and some dry clothes.”

“I know. That's why we came here. I have a shower.”

“Very true, but I don't have any clothes. I must start carrying a spare stash.” I eye him up.

“I'll stick them in the dryer. Unless you want me to take you home. It was just quicker to get back here from where we were.”

“It's all right,” I laugh. “You don't have to explain. Thanks for getting me to the closest hot shower.”

The car door creaks open with my foot still pushing on it. My foot drops to the concrete, but I stop. Keller runs to the front door, flings it open. I pull each saturated limb out at a time, and I walk with my arms and legs far apart. This feels so gross.

“You look like you've wet your pants.” He calls out disappearing into the house. By the time I make it in, I can hear water running.

“Shower is on, dry towel on the rail. Take your clothes off in there.”

“Telling me to get my clothes off again, Keller?” I put my hands on my hips. “What kind of a girl do you think I am?”

He pokes his tongue at me.

“Drop them outside the door, and I'll get them in the dryer. I'll put some dry stuff outside the door. You can wear those until yours are dry, and hopefully it will only be six and you'll be back just in time.”

He shuts his bedroom door and I go into his bathroom, quickly undress and drop my clothes in a dripping puddle outside the bathroom door. Then I run to the shower, shutting the door behind me and burst out laughing.

“Are you all right?” He calls through the closed door.

“Yip.” I call back laughing all over again. It's all boy stuff, I sniff at each of the bottles, all three of them. I guess Hayden wasn't a frequent user of his shower.

“I've left clothes outside the door. Take your time.” He shouts over the sound of the rushing water.

“Thanks, Keller.” The bedroom door shuts and I shiver under the water. I am so cold, my feet are burning in the hot water, but every time I turn it down it's too cold for the rest of my body.

I shove my whole head under and let it scold my scalp, I open my mouth and let the water gush over the edge making a waterfall, feeling the pull toward Keller through the wall. Shivering I turn and face the other way trying to block it out.

That must be five minutes. I flick off the water, inch open the door giggling, stick my hand out, pull in the clothes, and shut it again. What’s this? I tug on his pyjama pants, a t-shirt, and one of his hoodies, looking at my reflection in the mirror. I look awesome.

Keller is sitting on his bed when I come out. Legs stretched out, one arm crossed behind his head, reading a book. “Hey, you didn't have to get out yet.”

“Hostel girl. Five minutes and I'm out. Even when I want to stay in, I just can't.”

“Keller, you home?” His dad calls out from somewhere in the house.

“In here.” He moves off his bed to the door. “What's up?” He sticks his head out the door.

“What happened to the picnic?”

“Got rained out. Literally, Reid made a puddle in my car.”

“Too bad, son. What do you want for dinner?”

“I can cook for you.” I say moving forward. His dad's eyes rake over me, but he doesn't say anything.

“Yeah, we don't really cook,” Keller says.

“I wasn't asking you to. I said I would.”

“Yeah, we don't really cook,” he repeats.

“I think the words he is trying to make come out of his mouth are, we don't cook a lot, so we don't keep things on hand to cook with.”

“Same thing.” He shrugs.

“I'll get myself back to school. You guys should go eat.” I offer.

Keller looks insulted, “I'm not going to make you catch a bus back to school.”

“Yeah, and you probably shouldn't go outside looking like that.” His dad says.

I fake hurt. “That's terrible. I checked the mirror, and I look great.”

“I wouldn't count on that.”

“I'm hurt,” I sniff.

“How about I go get some pizza?” Keller’s dad suggests.

“Fine with me.” I smile brightly, moving down the hallway.

Keller pulls me into his chest when his dad shuts the front door. “I think you look cute in my clothes. It's like you’re drowning, but cute.”

I pull back the sleeves and the pants legs up, “how do you walk, everything is so long.” I say steeping back, still feeling the pull toward him. It’s not strong yet, but I can’t risk looking at him or having him that close.

“It's not on me.” He laughs. “What do you want to do?”

“I'm not in much of a hurry to do anything, what about you? Anyway.” I suck in a deep breath. “I will actually have to get back to school.”

“You will. But you have enough time to eat. Dad will only be a couple more minutes. The pizza place is at the end of the road.”

“You really don't cook at all?”

“Not really. No need.”

“Yeah. Decent food.”

“Mah. All food is good food once you have eaten it.” He laughs. “You smell like me. It's a bit weird to say you smell nice, so I won't, even though you do.”

He flicks on the TV I spread out on the couch and Keller takes the chair.

“All right, you two, let's eat.” John calls out walking back in.

“That was fast.” I say surprised.

“I told you. We just want to eat. Now. Because we're men.”

“That's right.” John says in a really deep voice, punching Keller in the arm to prove they are.

“Okay.” I laugh at them before shifting down to the middle of the floor, grab a slice, and lean back into Keller's legs while they flick through channel after channel of sport, controlling the urge. I can feel it there and it’s okay. I don’t need to do anything, I can control it, I tell myself staring at the screen. He moves his knee and I fall backwards and my body slips closer to him. I can feel my eyes starting to glaze over, I can feel it pulling me to him.

“Anyone else want a drink.” I ask high pitched and light headed, jumping up and away from him. Both their heads pop up looking toward me. I rush into the kitchen.

“Yeah I’ll have a glass of juice if you don’t mind pouring me one.” John says.

I open the refrigerator door, shoving my head inside, cooling everything down. It’s not working, I grab the bottle of juice and my feet start moving to the side.

Not now, please not now, not here. I beg myself. I force my feet to walk further into the kitchen and find a glass. Think about Sara or the pattern on the glass. I hold it up to the light inspecting minute cracks in the glass. Now pour the juice up to the line near the top. I feel it lulling. It’s still there, but my feet aren’t moving me anymore. I pour an extra glass for Keller and take them out.

“Thanks Reid.” John says in an odd tone that I don’t understand.

“We should get going.” I try to say sadly, but I have to get out of this house.

“I’ll get your clothes.” Keller offers. “They aren’t totally dry,” he says coming back, “you could just go back in what you’re wearing if you want.”

“I’ve seen what I look like, I’ll take the wet ones.” I would happily go back in what I’m wearing, but I would have to explain it to the duty teacher.

He touches my hand giving me my clothes back and I almost run out of the room, shutting his bedroom door behind me, but it worse in here because I can smell him. When I close my eyes it’s like he’s standing right next to me. I can feel him standing behind the closed door too.

I take off his hoodie and I hear him lean against the outside of the door waiting for me. I reach for the door handle and yank my hand away. Stop it Reid, just get dressed. I grab all my clothes and dump them on his bathroom floor, turning the bright lights on and stare at myself in the mirror. “Just get dressed,” I whisper to myself.

I pull my shoes on and sit for a minute on the tiles. I’m okay, I think. I can walk back out there, thank his dad for dinner get into his car and drive home.

I can think about him dating Megan if he finds out what I can do if it gets too bad in the car. I’ll open a window and let the cold wet air come in if that doesn’t work. I reassure myself standing behind the closed door with my hand on the handle. I’m going to be late if I don’t leave now.

Big breath.

“Thanks for getting me something to eat, Mr. Green.” I say to John as we walk out.

“Anytime. And please, just call me John.”

It's getting dark as Keller drives across the city. The lights are all on and the rain is still pouring down, but Keller doesn’t ask why I have the window down. We pull up at the front of the school. “Thanks for this afternoon, it was really fun.” I say.

“You need to get out more. That was driving while soaking; it's a wash cycle with wheels.”

I want to say more. But I'm late, and I can see people walking down the hallway for prep inside. I push the door open. “See you, tomorrow maybe?”

“Yeah.” But he is out of the door, before I can say anything else, reaches into the backseat, pulls out an umbrella and opens it for me.

“You are the sweetest person ever.”

He opens his mouth to say something, but closes it and pulls me up out of the car. I reach up to grab the handle, but he shuts the door behind me and walks me to the front door instead.

“I'll see you tomorrow.” I breathe.

The door opens. “Good evening Mrs. Snouse. Nice to see you again.” Keller beams at her holding the umbrella over my head, while he catches the drips from the edges on his shoulders.

“Have a good night,” he says to me, before running back to his car not waiting for Mrs Snouse to tell him to leave.

“Good morning, Miss South.” Keller says quickly. I wait to answer because I can hear him talking to someone at the store.

“Sorry,” he says coming back.

“It's all good.”

“Are you having a good day?”

“Why?”

He laughs, “Always so suspicious, Miss South. Can't I just call to say I had a great weekend? But you will never be allowed to choose the movie again.”

I open my mouth. Come on, something smart come out. “Yeah, okay it sucked.” Really, when a movie sucks that much, it's hard to think of something smart to defend it with.

“Sucked is an understatement. I'm still trying to figure out how to get a refund on the time I spent watching it.”

“It wasn't that bad,” I say rolling my eyes even though he can't see me.

“Yes it was. Never again. Choosing a movie is like a one-time pass. You screw it up, you never get it back again.”

I look toward the bell that starts screaming against the wall. “Isn't it lunch for you?”

“I wish. Just stopping between classes.”

“Right. Well, hey. You never said how your day is going.”

“Not too bad.” I think back over it. “Nothing great or awful to mention, this is the best bit.”

“That makes me feel great then.” He says. “I'm going to have to ditch out on this afternoon.”

“Oh.” I say disappointed. I know, it's less than twenty hours since I last saw him, but I don't care about being rational. That's reserved for people who aren't dating Keller.

“I know it's early in the week to be breaking plans, but Natalie just called in sick and there's no one to cover for her.”

“No, it's okay. Um, I'll just do, something. I'm sure there's heaps of stuff I'm meant to be doing. Awful stuff,” I add for extra guilt. “But I probably should do it anyway.”

“Well, seeing as you were so good at sticking stickers on CDs I thought you might want to come in anyway?”

“I'll catch the bus like last time,” I say way too quickly, making me sound ridiculously eager.

“Going to work for your boyfriend again, Reid?” Megan walks past, late as well. “No wonder he keeps going out with you. You don't have enough of a life to know when people just want your services.”

“Sorry,” Keller says. He must have heard her.

“It's not your fault. She's just jealous that she got turned down. Twice,” I say so she can hear me too. She pauses for a second then keeps going. “Anyway. I'll see you after school.”

“You sure you want to come? I shouldn't really ask you, coming to work with me is lame.”

“I want to.”

“If you are sure. Otherwise, if Sara wants to do something, or you just want to hang out at school, just let me know, and that's cool too.” Argh, stupid Megan, this conversation was going fine until she came along.

“No, I'll see you after school. But first I have to go to English. I might go sit next to Megan and ask her how her date was on Friday night.”

“Someone went out with her?”

“Nope.” He just laughs.

“See you later.” I hang up, and go take my seat as far away from Megan as the room will allow me to.

Mr Dean looks sternly across the room at me. “Ah, Reid. You have decided to join us, finally, again. You know, school does not run on your schedule. And I should take your phone from you. Next time, I will.”

“Sorry Sir.” I was going to say it won’t happen again, but I can’t promise things like that.

I can see the hands ticking on the clock above his head. I know that he’s speaking, I can see his mouth moving but I have no idea what he has said in the last thirty nine minutes and thirty six seconds. And in twenty four more seconds it won’t matter because class will be over.

I’m out of my seat before the bell finishes ringing and the first to the bus stop. Megan waves to me as she drives past with a full car. I pretend like I can’t see her.

* * *

John laughs when he sees me, shaking his head. “Poor boarding school girls. You just don't get out enough.” He stops, waiting until Keller is listening. “You know, I'm not sure that Keller is worth this.”