Authors: Kerry Heavens
“No, we’re free. It will be so lovely to see you. Do you have the weekend off?”
“Yes, Max has covered it. I just feel like getting away for the weekend.”
“Will Max not be coming?” She sounds disappointed. She loves Max and Charlie.
“Not this time.”
“Oh well, maybe we could kick Dave out and have a girls’ night!”
“Erm...well, I was hoping you wouldn't mind if I brought someone else with me.”
“What?” she gasps. “You haven’t taken Mark back have you?”
“No Mother! Of course not.”
“Well, that’s something. So it’s someone new? And you already want to bring him here? It must be serious.”
“You don’t mind do you?”
“No darling, not at all. As long as you’re happy…how did you meet him?”
“It’s a long story. We’ll tell you all about it when we get there.”
“Have you been seeing him long?”
“No, not really.”
“And he’s happy to meet the folks so soon?”
“Mum, it’s fine, you’ll see. We’ll be down about 3pm. Maybe we can all go out for dinner?”
“Lovely, drive safely,” she says, trying to sound convinced.
“Bye Mum.”
“Bye darling.”
I hang up and then in record time dial Connie. It rings. YES! I’ve beaten her to it.
“Hello?”
“Connie, it’s me.”
“Liv!”
“Listen, I just called Mum, I’m taking Danny down to see them later, but I didn’t tell her it’s him I’m bringing. She sounded concerned, so she’ll call you to get the info. Can you just be vague? I want to surprise her.”
“My lips are sealed darling. How is the lovely man?”
“Just lovely,” I sigh. I have to get a hold of the mushiness.
“Good, well you enjoy…yourselves.” As she’s speaking, the line cuts out for a second, She has a call waiting.
“Ooh, there’s the beeps, it must be Mum,” laughs Connie. “I’ll be the soul of discretion.”
“Thanks Connie.” And she’s gone.
I turn around smiling and Danny is watching me. He’s wet from the shower and cleanly shaved, wearing only a white towel round his waist. He looks amused.
“Why didn’t you just tell her?”
I shrug. “More fun this way.”
He narrows his eyes at me and smiles.
Twelve.
Liv.
Quiet!
We enjoy a lovely brunch with Max and Charlie. I considered blowing it out just this once, but Danny may as well be part of it. Mark never was and it made things difficult. Danny seems at ease with them and I think they genuinely like him. He has loads in common with Charlie and, unlike previous men in my life, he fully understands my relationship with Max. His relationship with Jen is the same. It’s a shame they’re not here, I’m sure we would all get along.
As they chat, I sit back and assess the situation. On paper, this could really work. I know it’s early days, but I trust him more than I’d trust anyone else. He seems utterly unfazed by the fact that I live here and clearly don’t plan to leave, so maybe he could see himself here too. I’m not nearly as freaked out as I was at first. Something changed yesterday, when he helped out in the bar. I compared him to Mark and suddenly it opened my eyes.
He said to me in the pub, he wouldn’t tell me how he felt, he would show me, and so far I think he has. He’s made me feel much more relaxed and secure since…was that yesterday? I’m losing track. Yes, it was only yesterday. In fact he hasn’t yet been here forty-eight hours and look how much my life has changed. It’s ridiculous really, to be feeling how I feel and considering so much after such a short time. I have to keep reminding myself this is not a new relationship and the normal rules don’t apply.
I’m so happy right now and given that I’m newly single and supposed to be dealing with the hurt of infidelity, I couldn’t be better. I was determined not to get into another long-term relationship. But I wasn’t prepared for this little curve ball. I just have to see what the next two weeks bring. After that, who knows. Right now, I’m going to pack a bag and take Danny to my parents. I hope they’re as happy about his return as I am.
We say goodbye to the boys and pack a few bits in a bag. We’re sharing a bag of mine as his case is too big and his backpack is too small. It feels like a big deal. We both gloss over the weirdness, it’s practical. But it’s yet another questionable leap into domesticity.
We throw the bag into my Mini and I drive us out of town. We chat as I drive and listen to music. But he’
s quiet as we join the M23.
“Are you okay?”
“Just worried that your parents won’t like it, that’s all. I wish you’d told them.”
“They’ll be fine, trust me.” My mum thought Danny was the best thing since sliced bread, she was almost as cut up about him leaving as I was. She’s going to be blown away. I smile, glancing at him. “You’ll see.”
“I just don’t want them to put doubts in your head.”
“Just relax, that’s why we’re going.”
He takes a deep breath and seems to snap himself out of it.
“This is a great car,” he says, running his hand along the inside of the door. “Very you.”
I smirk. It’s very me. It’s only three years old and was my first ‘new, new’ car. It’s the red one with the union jack on the roof and the white stripes on the bonnet and I love it.
“What do you drive?”
He squirms with embarrassment.
“A Ford F-150.”
“What’s that? One of those huge great pickup trucks?”
“Yep.”
“No Prius?”
“Um, no.”
“How very anti-establishment of you.”
“That’s just my run around,” he says quietly.
“What, you have more than one car?”
“Yeah, a few years ago I got my dream car, but she’s a classic.”
“She? Oh God, is she my competition?” I laugh. “What is
she
?”
“A 1967 Ford Shelby Mustang GT500.”
I gawp at him.
“Eleanor?”
He laughs hard at my ‘Gone in 60 Seconds’ reference.
“Only you would know that Liv!” he says, running his hand up my leg. “That’s why I…” he trails off, catching himself about to break his promise.
I ignore it.
“That is amazing, is it…sorry ‘she’, in good condition?”
“She is now,” he says with pride.
“I would love to drive a proper muscle car. I bet it’s incredible.”
“Well you can drive her anytime.”
“Really? That’s possibly the coolest car ever made. The sound they make...ugh!”
“Yeah, she’s got some lungs.”
“Wow, I can’t wait to meet her.” I laugh. “I hope she likes me!”
Danny shakes his head at my disrespect.
"I would love a vintage car, but I couldn't be arsed with the upkeep."
"What would you have? No wait, I bet I can guess. Knowing you I would be a DeLorean."
I steel a sideways glance at him, tutting. "As if! There is nothing sexy about a DeLorean. No, it would be a 1950s Porsche Speedster Convertible. Not that I’ve given it any thought. I think they changed the spec after ’56 or something, so one before that.” I laugh.
"Nice." Danny nods appreciatively.
I signal to come off onto the A23. We’re almost there and I begin to feel nervous. I hope this goes well. We drive in silence until we get into Brighton and Danny takes my hand, for comfort I suspect. I give it a little squeeze.
I pull into my parents’ driveway and stop the car. We exchange a tense glance as we climb out. Why am I so nervous? Danny takes my hand and I lead him down the side of the house, ignoring the front door. We come to the back door.
“Ready?” I ask. He nods, then smiles and shakes his head. “We could still go to a hotel,” I joke, starting to turn away.
He pulls me back.
“No! Let’s do it.” He smiles.
I open the door and we walk in.
“Hello?” I call.
“Liv?” My mum yells from upstairs. “Dave, they’re here!”
I hear clumping around above us and then they both come down the stairs. We stand hand in hand in the kitchen and as they round the corner and see us, they both freeze.
“Oh my God!...Danny?” Mum comes forward first, a look of amazed wonder on her face. “Shit, look at you.” She smiles and goes up to him. For a minute I think she’s going to grab his face to check if he’s real, but she seems satisfied without molesting him. She laughs and hugs him. He laughs too.
“It’s great to see you again, Helen.” Danny hugs her back. Then she releases him and turns to me with a look of ‘what the hell?’ on her face before hugging me. Danny steps forward and shakes a dumbfounded Dave’s hand. Mum steps back and looks at us both.
“What on earth is going on? You two have some explaining to do. I think I’ll need a tea.” She shakes her head and puts the kettle on. “Dave, get the mugs,” she bosses. This is mum caught off guard, flustered.
Danny and Dave exchange pleasantries and move away from us slightly. Mum and I get the tea things ready and while the men are out of earshot, she hisses, “What’s going on?”
I laugh. “I don’t really know.” She frowns at me, not happy with the lack of information.
“So Danny,” Mum says loudly interrupting his chat with Dave. “How have you been? What do you do with yourself?”
“I’ve been great thanks. I live in Santa Monica. I design computer software. I work from home, it’s quite dull really. But life is good,” he replies; tension etched on his face. His eyes catch mine almost asking, did I do ok? I give him a reassuring smile.
We move into the living room. Mum doesn’t even wait for us to sit down before she continues.
“So what brings you back to dreary old England then?”
I shoot her a look. Easy Mum.
Danny takes a deep breath, sitting beside me on the sofa.
“I was thinking about Liv and decided to look her up, so I found her on Facebook and we talked a couple of times.” He takes my hand. “It was obvious right away that we missed each other. It really affected me, talking to her again after all these years, more than I thought it would. So I felt I should come and find out if there was still anything between us. I needed a vacation, so I came and surprised her.” I laugh; this is the understatement of the century.
She passes us our teas.
“And now you two are, you know, an item?”
“Helen!” Dave admonishes. Mum tuts and waves him away.
“I think we are.” Danny smiles at me.
Mum grins; I knew she would like it.
“So when did this all happen?” she asks, casually taking a sip of her tea.
“Thursday.”
Mum splutters. “Thursday? As in two days ago?”
Danny winces, as do I. We’re both very aware that our relationship, or whatever you would call it, won’t stand up to much scrutiny at this point.
“I know it’s fast,” Danny says in defence, “but we have a past...and it’s not like we broke up, we just couldn’t be together anymore." He pauses and looks to me for reassurance, backup, some kind of support. I can feel how desperate he is for their approval, because they matter. He sighs; "I can’t be any other way around her.”
He’s almost apologetic. I feel for him, maybe it’s a bit soon to bring my parents into it.
“I feel the same,” I manage. “It’s just natural...you know? How it should be.”
“A week ago, I had no idea this would happen,” Danny shrugs. “When it did, I thought it would be nice to talk to an old friend. I never thought I would be here now.”
"But we are being realistic," I add. "Danny is here for a holiday right now. So although we can't help how we feel, we’re giving it two weeks, then we’ll see." An unwelcome wave of panic sweeps over me when I contemplate what will happen after two weeks. I fight it back, here and now, is what I have to tell myself. Here and now.
Mum thinks about this for a minute.
"Well as long as you look after each other like you used to, I won't have anything to worry about," she says and smiles fondly. Danny gives my hand a little squeeze and I feel him smile, although I can't look at him because I feel like I might cry all of a sudden.
Breaking the emotional silence and rescuing Danny, Dave speaks up.
"So Danny, how are your parents?"
"They're doing great thanks," he gushes, grateful for the change of subject. "Dad retired last summer. He’s taking classes and 'taking time to smell the roses' he says. Mom's not ready to give it up just yet, but she has slowed down. She doesn't work as painfully hard as she used to. Right now, they are on vacation in Cabo. They're looking to buy a place there."
"Ah retirement!" sighs Dave wistfully.
“Oh stop it, Dave!” Mum jests. “You wouldn’t know what to do with yourself if you had all that time on your hands.”
“You manage. Although, you do seem to have the responsibility of keeping Brighton’s retail trade afloat, single-handedly. That seems to consume a lot of your time,” Dave retorts. Mum narrows her eyes at him and shakes her head. We all laugh.
The conversation moves on and becomes easier. Tuning it out, I reflect on what we have established here today. We’ve told my parents; in fact, I’ve heard Danny say that he thinks we’re an item. I’m trying not to get carried away; we need to see what will happen. But I do now understand why he was so enthusiastic about coming here. It does feel great to receive approval. It does make it real. However, how we will approach the future after this ‘holiday’ period remains to be seen. I’m on an emotional knife-edge. I feel like I could fall either way. Here and now is all I can hang onto.
We walk into Kemptown for dinner at a little bistro owned by a friend of Dave’s. Danny is trying to explain to Dave what it is he does for a living and Dave is really interested. But frankly, he can’t work a remote control, so there’s not a chance of him grasping the technical details of software development. As Danny is patiently explaining the mechanics to him, Mum links arms with me and steers me towards a shop window on the pretence of looking at something.
“So?” she hisses.
“So what?”
“Well? Are you okay with this?”
“Yeah, I am. Nervous, but really happy.” I shrug.
“You won’t get hurt again will you?”
“Who knows, Mum? But isn’t it at least worth a try? I know it was a lifetime ago, but I loved him and I think he loved me.”
“He still does,” she says matter-of-factly.