My Body-His (31 page)

“
Who the hell will be seeing there?” I said out
loud.

Parker cracked up laughing and said, “At least she
didn’t ask me to put it there.”

I giggled along with her.

Once completely covered from head to toe I looked at
my reflection in the mirror. My body looked rather stunning. I had
a golden glow. The lotion produced a much subtler effect than gold
paint, imbuing my skin with a metallic sheen. The gold on my face
made my green eyes sparkle with striking clarity.

“
You look sensational, awesome,” Parker said
with a grin.

“
Once you’re completely dry we can continue.
Keep your arms up,” Karla said as she left the room.

I turned to Parker and said, “I can’t begin to thank
you. You’ve been the most amazing friend. I’d be so honored for you
to stand with me when I get married. I’m sorry I didn’t ask you
first but—”

“
You and Sandy go further back and I know she
always says you will be in her wedding. I’m not the least bit
upset. I’m truly happy that I’ve been able to be here for you. I
know you’d do the same for me.”

“
I absolutely will. Thank you. I’d hug you if I
could.” I gave a little shrug. My arms ached from holding them
out.

Karla came back into the room carrying a box. “You
can put your arms down now,” she said.

I relaxed my shoulders and walked back over to the
chair. Placing the box on the dresser, Karla opened the lid and
took out a set of what looked like starched satin cuffs from the
ends of a white tuxedo shirt. She affixed one to each wrist and
ankle.

Next she retrieved two gold chains. She wrapped one
around my waist and clasped it right below my belly button. A charm
dangled from it that simply said MINE. She put a similar strand
around my neck. This one was a bit thicker and had a charm with
diamonds that read LUKE. She placed matching dangling diamond
earrings in my ears and turned me toward the mirror.

She applied a subtle line of brown eyeliner under my
eyes to bring out their green color and a darker shade of gold
lipstick.

A nymph stared back at me from the mirror. I had put
on a few pounds since quitting my job and spending all my time at
home with Luke, so I appeared more voluptuous and curvy. The
overall effect of nakedness plus the cuffs and jewelry was
arresting.

“
I can’t believe I’m going to say this to you,
but Jane, you look amazing. The idea of you walking down the aisle
naked still makes no sense to me but you have nothing to be ashamed
of. You’ll be the most beautiful bride.”

“
Thank you for that, Parker,” I
said.

“
Time for you to leave,” Karla said to
Parker.

“
Oh, okay. Jane, I’ll wait for you in your
office,” she said as she left us alone.

Karla placed a towel on the chair and had me sit
down. She spread my legs and made sure all areas, including my
mound, was covered with the gold sheen.

“
There’s one more thing,” she said. I heard
hesitation in her voice.

“
What?” I said. My stomach started to
churn.

“
I need you to bend over again,” she said. Her
demeanor had changed.

“
What is it?” I said, getting quite impatient
with the process.

She opened the box again and pulled out a butt
plug.

“
Oh, is that all. It’s the small one at that.
Give it to me. You can go. I’ll take care of it.”

“
I’m supposed to make sure—”

“
OUT!” I said, pointing to the door.

“
Okay,” she said. She packed up her brushes and
other supplies.

“
Thanks, by the way. You did a great
job.”

“
Right, okay,” she said and scooted out the
door.

“
You ready for me?” Parker said from across the
hall.

“
Give me a few,” I said.

I closed the door and looked back in the box. The
olive oil was there waiting for me. I went into the bathroom and
put my leg up on the tub. After a few tries I managed to get the
plug inside. I looked into the full length mirror on the back of
the bathroom door and made sure no one could tell that I had the
butt plug in me.

I walked out and went into my writing room.

“
What was all of that about?” Parker
asked.

“
Oh, nothing. Nothing to worry about. Do you
want get Luke for me?”

“
Sure, but do you think he’ll want to see you
before the wedding?”

“
I’m sure he’ll want to check out his handy
work.”

“
Okay,” Parker said as she left the
room.

I admired myself in the mirror as Luke came into the
bedroom. He had changed into a white linen suit. The bright blue
shirt under the jacket made his gray eyes seem blue.

“
Wow, babe, even better than I imagined. You
look breathtaking.”

I blushed. “Thank you,” I said.

“
It’s missing something though. I’ll be right
back.”

I couldn’t imagine what he had in mind, but I didn’t
have long to wait. He came back into the bedroom with Karla, who
was carrying a tackle box.

Placing it on the chest of drawers, she opened the
latches. “Sit,” she said.

I obliged, a sinking feeling in my stomach.

“
Luke?” I said.

He said nothing and I looked back over at Karla. She
was applying alcohol to a large q-tip. When she touched it to my
nipple, I yelped.

“
Wait,” I said. “Could you leave us for a
minute, Karla?”

“
That won’t be necessary,” Luke said. “Are you
arguing with me, Jane?”

“
Well, no but—”

“
But?”

“
Nothing,” I said. I gripped the sides of the
chair and held my breath.

She finished cleaning the right nipple of the gold
lotion and took out another swab.

“
Oh no, not both!” I blurted out.

“
Jane?” he said. He walked over to the door and
opened it, catapulting me back to the first time we’d met. I had
the choice then to walk away before all of this started and now he
stood there offering me that choice once more. Standing in the
hallway, Parker saw my tears.

“
Jane, do you want—”

“
I’m fine,” I said. I looked away and watched
Karla clean my left nipple. She took out a spray bottle and aimed
the nozzle. I felt extreme discomfort and then nothing but icy
cold.

“
It’s better if you don’t watch,” Karla said to
me.

Luke took my clamped right hand off of the arm of the
chair and held it in his.

“
On three. One, two ….” Karla never said three.
The excruciating pain shot through my nipple and coursed throughout
my body.

“
Fuck shit, fuck shit, fuck,” I said, screaming
inside.

She inserted the horseshoe shaped ring with diamonds
facing out of the tips.

“
Excellent,” Luke said.

Luke came around to the other side of me and held
onto my left hand.

Karla didn’t even bother with her counting trick for
the second side. She sprayed the nipple quickly and pierced me
again.

“
Motherfucker, UGH!” I said. I groaned and felt
nauseous. “I think I need to lie down.”

“
One more minute, love. She’s just going to put
the ring in.”

Karla quickly inserted the gold and diamond
piece.

Luke helped me over to the bed. He opened the door
and said, “Parker, could you please get Jane some OJ? Thanks.”

Karla came over to me and touched up the gold lotion.
A wave of nausea passed through me each time she touched my nipple.
She dried my eyes and reapplied the gold sheen and eye makeup.

“
Are you okay?” Parker asked, walking over to
my side of the bed. She offered me the juice but Luke took
it.

Luke lifted my upper body and helped me drink.

“
I forgot to eat,” I said as if that explained
everything.

At first, when she noticed my piercings, Parker
didn’t say anything but it was written all over her face. She took
Luke’s place and whispered, “What the fuck are you doing? This
isn’t you. I could buy all the rest of it but this has gone too far
and I’m honestly worried for your safety. There are no limits, are
there? I’ll be here and support you but don’t think I support
this.”

I knew my piercings would bother my mother even more
than my nudity.

“
Please leave,” Luke said to Parker and
Karla.

Once they were out of the room and the door closed
behind them Luke said, “Do you think you can stand?”

“
I don’t know,” I said.

He took my hand and helped me out of the bed. He fed
me more juice and led me to the mirror.

I didn’t recognize myself.

“
You are so beautiful, my Janey. I am so happy
to be making you my wife.”

His words warmed me, but I continued to stare at the
stranger in the mirror. I no longer recognized her. I felt a tug of
war going on inside me. I knew Jane lived in there somewhere. The
person in the mirror was babe, love, Janey. If asked at that moment
who I wanted to be, I would have had no answer. I looked like a sex
goddess. I looked beautiful, but there could be no denying my
purpose. The person in the mirror existed solely for pleasure.
There could be no mistaking it. Luke wanted everyone to know who
I’d become.

Up till now, the process of crossing over to the new
me had seemed ongoing, and yet I recognized that
this
threshold,
this
hurdle was the most significant, heralding
the end of my ability to cross back.

At the end of the aisle lay the point of no
return.

I could hear the clamor and clattering and hustle and
bustle of people in the house. The time drew near.

Luke and I walked out into the living room facing the
back of the house. Between the bushes I could see people seated in
the chairs. My stomach churned and I felt queasy.

Luke turned me to face him and said, “I know you’re
scared, Janey. Hey, look at me.”

I tilted my head up trying to remember to
breathe.

“
You’re doing this for me, doing this for us. I
couldn’t be any more proud of you. I need to go out there now. Wait
about five minutes and join me on the beach.”

He kissed me lightly on the lips and then left
through the French doors.

I watched him walk around the pool, between the
tables, and down the stairs. My heart pounded so hard that I began
to hyperventilate. I knew I needed to start walking in another
minute or two. I didn’t know how I’d make myself put one foot in
front of the other. I most dreaded walking past Sandy and my
mother. I wondered how I could do it in front of so many people I’d
never met. Such a deviation from the wedding I had spent so many
hours rehearsing in my head. Mourning for a moment that it had to
be this way, I breathed deeply.

A caterer came over and asked if I was all right.
Aware that I was shaking and in full panic mode, she offered me
water. I drank half the glass and settled down.

“
Thank you,” I said. “It’s now or never, I
guess.”

“
I could never do it myself but you do look
amazing. They’re waiting for you.”

I picked up the bouquet of gold roses that had been
left for me by the couch. I imagined myself to be very small and
that the flowers I held hid my body from the crowd. I passed
through the open French doors and snaked my way around the tables.
When I got to the steps that led down to the beach I stopped. I
could see all the people. Luke was waiting for me just inside the
gazebo next to the Justice of the Peace and Parker.

Luke turned and saw me. The radiant smile on his
face, the love shining in his eyes took all my fears away. He loved
me. I wouldn’t spend the rest of my life alone. I’d have a place
where I belonged. Parker’s words, a distant memory.

I walked slowly down the steps and everyone seated
stood and turned to face me. I kept my eyes locked on Luke the
entire time. No one else existed for me but Luke. Just Luke and his
love calling me like a beacon in a foggy night. I moved with ease
toward the life I had chosen. No one would understand. Not even I
understood, but at that moment, I wanted it.

I knew my friends and mother were worried about me,
worried what would become of me. Just before I reached Luke on the
sand, I thought once again about my father and what he had always
told me about choices. I couldn’t be sure if this would be a good
choice or a dreadful one, but I slipped my hand into Luke’s and
gave myself over to everything he had in store for me.

Following is
a
n
excerpt from

MY BODY-HIS
(
MARCELLO
)

The next book in the
My Body
series

By Blakely Bennett

Coming
in
March
2013

“
I can’t wait until later,” he said to me after
our dance ended.

“
Later?” I said. “I don’t think so.” I pulled
myself free of his grip and furrowed my brow.

“
You might want to watch how you speak to me,”
Marcello said. He looked directly into my eyes as if he could will
my obedience.