Reckless Radiance (4 page)

Down the street a little ways they found a bench and sat down together. The sky was turning navy blue speckled with stars and the air smelled crisp. “How is your tea?” he asked. Valerie smiled at him and nodded, holding tightly to the green paper cup. “Really good.”

Russell smiled back and she felt a surge of electricity roll through her chest. It was a feeling she’d missed. There was nothing electric about Henry. Not the way he looked at her or how he touched her. Henry was dull and their time together deadened her. In a matter of moments, Russell had put a smile on her face and a spark in her veins. Something was different about him.

“What are you doing tomorrow,” he asked delicately.

The charge rippled through her again.

“Nothing. I’m not working tomorrow.”

“May I take you on a proper date? A day date. I know the perfect place,” he said with a hint of sparkle in his eyes.

This man was unbelievable. Valerie pulsed with a feeling that told her to say yes before she was overcome with the urge to say no.

She reached over and put her hand on his and the strangest thing happened. The same spark that lit up the space between their fingers in the diner flared again. A subtle golden light flickered and Valerie thought she might even be imagining it. It wasn’t the spark that took her off guard though. It was a feeling. An emotion came over her quickly when her hand rested on his for a mere second. She was flooded with an inexplicable sense of tranquility. In the time it took for her to process the sensation, Russell pulled his hand away and stared at her, waiting for her reply.

Valerie searched his face for an explanation.
Where did that come from?
She cleared her throat and turned her attention to the ground. “Tomorrow … tomorrow would be great,” she said. She sipped at her tea again to distract from the awkwardness that grew between them.

“I should get going,” she said, pressing her lips in a thin line. She stood and forced a smile. She wished she hadn’t laid a finger on him now that she knew how it made her feel.

Whatever his deal was she didn’t really care. He was kind and gentle and easy on the eyes and even though something was—different, she didn’t think she minded.

“Pick me up at Penny’s,” she blurted before she could overthink it any more.

“One o’clock?” he smiled. Valerie nodded and met his eyes meaningfully. She let out a sigh before telling Russell goodnight.

She sat in the parking lot behind Penny’s and waited for her car to heat up a little. As warm air finally started to blow out of the vents in front of her, she clicked her seatbelt into place and looked in the rearview mirror. For a moment she caught sight of her own eyes. They looked different. Her eyes seemed to have life in them, a brightness she barely recognized. She reached for her purse, digging out the cell phone from the side pocket.

She pulled up his name in her contacts list quickly and called without a second thought. Then she waited, holding her breath.

“This is Henry, you know what to do.” A beep followed his usual brash tone and Valerie’s words stuck in her throat for a beat.

“Henry, it’s Val. I really hate to do this in a message but it’s time. I don’t think we should see each other anymore. We’re just—bad for each other, Henry.” She hung up the phone with ease and calm settled inside of her.

Chapter Six

He walked to his hotel with the brisk air blowing his hair in his eyes. He couldn’t get her beautiful face out of his head. It was what he’d been waiting for. Not only had she seen him but she’d let him in. Barely. Their few minutes in the coffee shop and walking along a concrete path to a park bench may have seemed mundane to ordinary eyes but to him it was a dream realized. Everything about her from her hair to her hands to the sound of her shy laugh was just as he remembered. Guilt filled him, though. There was so much she didn’t know. So much she couldn’t know—not yet. Everything about what he was doing was dangerous but he couldn’t resist her.

There was something else he couldn’t get out of his head. That dreaded noise. It was the distant sound of bells but there was no mistaking it was coming from inside his mind. Ding. Ring. Ding. Ring. He hadn’t heard it in months … then she put her hand on him.

A spark on the tip of his finger was one thing but that flash when her hand rested on his ever so briefly may as well have been a beacon. A cursed searchlight.

Sliding the card in the slot on the door, he watched the light blink from red to green as he opened the door where his bed sat waiting for him. It had been a long day. Keeping control over his physical form during their date had been exhausting. And he had to go and ask to see her again tomorrow which meant he’d better rest up if he wanted to keep some composure about him and avoid the wind chime in the back of his brain.

He lay on the bed and looked up at the ceiling like he had so many nights before when he was still looking for her. Damn the bells and damn the sparks—she was worth it. It was all worth it.

Chapter Seven

Valerie couldn’t remember the last time she spent more than five minutes on her hair and she really couldn’t recall the last time she’d put on anything other than work clothes or pajamas. She rummaged through her tiny closet and found a dark red sweater dress that had long been forgotten and a pair of black leggings with the tags still on them. She worked hard to put her hair in pretty waves and tint her cheeks with blush.

When she took a last look at herself in the mirror, she smiled. She didn’t need to get all dolled up for him. Obviously he’d seen something in her at the diner in her flour dusted black pants and custard yellow blouse Penny insisted the girls wear. It was a horrible color on Valerie but Penny said it was sunny and would make people want lemon meringue.

She hadn’t dug out the cute outfit and the curling iron for him necessarily but it was something about the way he looked at her that reminded her she deserved to be
looked
at. Still unsure of what she was looking for in Russell, she was only positive about one thing. She was done with Henry and done with sulking around.

She drove to Penny’s and waited outside the front door for him. The smell of October was in the air and for an instant, she missed her home horribly. There was nothing like autumn at the Gilmore farm. The leaves were so perfect they looked like paintings on the skyline. A fog would roll across the fields broken only by the barn. And then of course there was her mother’s cooking to warm her on a chilly day.

She was about to turn up an absent smile at the sweet memories of home when she saw Russell walking toward her with a beaming grin.

“Hello, Valerie,” he said when he approached.

Valerie smiled and tucked her hair behind her ears letting her bashfulness get the better of her. “Hi.”

“I have a bit of a problem,” he said, twisting his lips.

Her brow rose and she waited for him to tell her he had to break their date or worse—he was married, a serial killer or a con artist.
Just my luck
, she thought.

“I forgot to mention I don’t have a car. Would you mind driving?” he asked.

Valerie laughed and without a word, dangled her keys in front of him and started leading the way to her car. He chuckled at her side and she found herself unable to keep from looking at him from the corner of her eye.

Once they were closed up in the car, seatbelts on and barely a word said between them, she finally asked. “Where exactly are we going?”

Russell turned to her from the passenger seat and gave her that same boyish grin. “Bowling. Pin City on Amherst.”

She gawked at him after starting the car. “I love bowling. How did you know that?” She was back to the feeling she had when he first sat down in her section at the diner. Like he knew her. The pale sapphires he had for eyes danced across her face apprehensively.

“Everyone loves bowling, Valerie,” he replied.

The bowling alley was deserted. They picked up their clownish shoes and picked out their ideal balls for the sport and got set up on lane five. Russell entered their names on the electronic scoreboard as Valerie tied the neon green laces of the rented shoes. Glancing over at him, she giggled. Tall, dark and handsome and wearing orange and green shoes that were so bright they could stop traffic.

Russell turned to her and followed her gaze looking down at his feet then to hers. “That isn’t fair. You make them look cute,” he said.

Her head ducked down immediately and she shuffled her toes in the ridiculous shoes before giving him another shy glance.

They started the game and after three turns, Valerie had switched balls twice and managed to land one turn in the gutter and the other two with less than half the pins knocked down. Meanwhile, Russell was sitting comfortably in the winning spot with a perfect score. Three strikes in a row.

“Man, I used to be really good at this. Are you some kind of bowling shark?” she asked with a laugh.

He bent down to gather his ball from the spinning return and glanced up at her, his dark hair falling over his eyes for a moment before he brushed the hair off his face. “What does a sea animal have to do with this game?” he replied sincerely.
Is he for real?
Valerie laughed and shook her head. With perfect form and a deliberate, strong hand, he sent the ball rolling down the lane and it curved right into the gutter. His face was shocked and he looked back at her as she let a gloating grin sit on her lips. Valerie shrugged and he prepared for his second turn in which the exact same thing happened.

Valerie strutted passed him, patted him on the bicep before picking up the hot pink ball she’d settled on. “It’s a
sport
, not a game,” she quipped.

Russell guffawed and took a seat to watch her attempt. She took a breath, held the ball under her chin, reared it back slow and low and finally shot it forward as gracefully as she could manage
. Strike.
Valerie leapt in the air watching all ten of the white pins clatter and get swept away. She squealed and spun on the slick floor to face Russell. Sitting in the bright blue plastic booth of their lane with his forearms resting on his knees, he stared at her as she walked toward him. Valerie saw something behind his eyes. It was the sweet and gentle look of a man who cared for her.
And for no good reason
, she thought. His smile was so genuine it stunned her. The joy he seemed to exude at her happiness was astounding.

He stood, ready for his turn, and when he brushed past her, he leaned in to her and whispered in her ear. “Still got it.”

She met his eyes for an instant and saw his charming smirk lend a sparkle to his already striking stare. She sighed at the smoldering look from him.
Still got it.

***

They settled on accepting a tie before moving to the snack area for some food. One game won by Russell and one by Valerie. Valerie was picking pieces off her salted soft pretzel when Russell arrived with their drinks.

“Was this fun?” Russell asked, raising the red paper cup to his lips. She nodded silently and took a drink as well.

“How long has it been since you had fun?” The question hit her in the chest and she felt herself holding her breath, saving herself from showing him her cards.
A long damn time
, she thought. She shrugged and forced a smile before slyly letting out a heavy, quaking breath.

“Are you ever going to tell me anything about you?” she blurted. He’d barely told her a thing besides the fact he liked bowling. But then again so did everyone according to him. He knew about her job, where she grew up, what her parents did. She knew his name.

Russell laughed and dipped a black-speckled corn chip into a tiny cup of nacho cheese. He silenced himself with the food and nodded at her. “What would you like to know?”

“Do you have a job?”

He paused a moment and his hand moved to his chin, a thoughtful pose. “I did have a job. But I quit,” he said.

Great
, she thought,
here it comes.

With his eyes narrowed and focused on no place in particular he sighed. “I found myself exceedingly conflicted with the way the … business was being handled. It was time for me to take a step back.”

Valerie nodded. “Sure, I get that. Sometimes you just need to get away,” she said. “What have you been doing with your new found freedom?”

A laugh boomed out of him and he shook his head with a grin as if he had a joke Valerie wasn’t in on. “I’ve been travelling. Searching for something.”

She gazed at him. His words so secretive and yet completely telling. The idea of not working, travelling and s
earching for something
had such a romantic notion to it. She wondered if he was on the verge of finding what he was looking for because she certainly thought she was.

“What do you say, tie breaker?” Russell asked eyeing the alleyway behind her.

She grinned. Granting him another game, she felt that same surge of electricity flow through her body.

Chapter Eight

Valerie couldn’t erase the smile from her lips as she flopped back on her bed and sighed. Who was he? Why was he so—enticing? Whatever the reason, she didn’t really care. She was content to push aside the mystery of him for a while longer and simply revel in her happiness for once. She was surprised and yet relieved he hadn’t attempted an end-of-the-date kiss after she drove them back to Penny’s. Part of her wanted to push herself up on her toes and plant one on him but at the same time, she feared the anxiety she knew would bubble under the surface with such a move. Kisses were difficult. She rarely kissed Henry. There was something about a kiss that was more than sex. Though a kiss could be sweet or carnal, rushed or languid, it was precious and intimate. Henry wasn’t worthy of the kinds of kisses Valerie had locked away. She wondered if Russell would prove himself to be kissable. Her grin grew as she let herself believe he would.

She closed her eyes for a moment and slumber faded in.