Stranded On Christmas (14 page)

I
decided not to go to the police. I loved Gideon. I just loved my
freedom more.

I
walked for hours and then found myself standing at the side of a lake
that was so big I couldn't see the other side.

At
first I was disappointed, but then I figured that people have lake
homes in the United States. Maybe they would here too. Maybe even one
with a phone.

I
walked until it was dark. Gideon would be flipping out at home.

I
had left after lunch. Now I was cold, hungry and so tired. I hadn't
seen any sign of life at all here. No buildings, no people.

I
walked on, thinking that I was closer to finding something going
straight on then turning around and heading back to certain
punishment.

I
wondered if Gideon had called together a manhunt. Well, in my case it
would be a naughty wife hunt. Their way of thinking not mine. My way
of thinking, this was me trying to free myself.

“
Jessica,”
I heard him call out.

My
heart stood still for a second. I turned and saw him running towards
me.

I
took off running too. He was quickly closing the distance. I grabbed
onto a thick tree, so I could hide behind it.

“
Jessica,
you’re only making it worse. Wait until I get you home.”

“
I'm
sorry Gideon, but I’ve chosen to live elsewhere. I'm not going with
you.”

“
Do
you want to bet?”

Pumpkin,
that traitor, was at Gideon's feet hopping on his hind legs because
he was so happy to see him.

“
It
isn't right to kidnap people. I have the right to leave.”

“
I
was so naïve. I thought we were past this. But I see we aren't. You
know I don't have time for this.”

“
What
do I care? I saw a chance to leave and I took it. I apparently went
the wrong way, but otherwise, the idea was sound.”

“
I’m
going to make you pay for that.” He was on the other side of the
tree now. He was as mad as could be and trying to get at me. I ducked
away before he could grab onto me.

He
tried to grab onto me again and again, but I was desperate to get
away from him. He turned around and walked away from me.

I
sighed relieved. He had given up. Now I just had to find my way out
of these woods and back to civilization.

I
was hurrying off again. But I could still hear Gideon coming after
me. He wasn't giving up as I hoped. He was right behind me, so I
darted to the right and duck behind another fat tree. I felt
something bite into my leg. I looked down and got another bite.

I
looked up at Gideon. He was smiling now. “No matter what, I win.”
He had a long stick in his hand. It was a young and bendy stick,
practically a whip and he was aiming at my legs, right above my
boots. I wished I had jeans on.

Of
course, I had a dress on. I was only allowed to wear dresses. He had
brought home a couple new ones a few months ago on Valentine's Day. I
had made him a special meal. After we had cleaned up the kitchen
together, we had gone up to our room and made love. It had been a
special day. They were simple gifts, but they had come from the
heart.

I
had meant it when I said I loved him and that I wanted him to love
me.

He
whipped, and I moved away from him. That love was quickly melting
away.

We
went around the tree several times while I yelped and scolded him to
stop.

“
I
want a divorce,” I screamed at the top of my lungs and ran again.

He
ran after me whipping as he ran. My heart felt like it was going to
explode, and he was right behind me. If he had time to whip me, then
he had time to catch me. There was no way out. I would need a better
plan next time.

My
legs were shaking with fear and overexertion. My lungs felt like they
were going to burst.

Gideon
was madder than I had ever seen him before, and I had seen him very
mad.

I
couldn't go on, and I was too scared to scream decently for help. My
voice just wasn't coming out right anymore. I knew I was going to
stumble. It was just a matter of time.

I
darted behind a tree again. I just stood there with my hands covering
my face and bawling while he whipped my legs.

I
would lift the leg he had just whipped, and then he would whip the
other one. It must have looked like I was doing a dance to him.

He
just whipped on and on without saying anything.

I
couldn't take it anymore. It just stung so. I was screaming out so
loud that if anyone other than us were out here, they would have to
have heard me.

If
he took me back home, he didn't have to think that I would be so nice
to him anymore. I would never cook, clean, wash his dirty clothes or
sleep with him again.

He
lifted up the back of my dress, and he held the fabric up high with
his hand pressing into the tree next to my head. He was whipping
higher now.

I
couldn't think about anything else now. I just wanted this over with.
I couldn't take it anymore. “I'm so sorry. Please, I'm begging you,
please stop.”

“
You
aren't sorry for running away. You’re only sorry that you got
caught and that I’m whipping you now.”

He
went on until I was so exhausted that I slid down the tree, slumping
at the foot of the tree.

After
I had calmed down enough to walk, he grabbed hold of my hand. He
still had the long bendy stick in his other hand.

I
must have been walking in circles because we were home quickly.

He
sent me to our room. I heard him go back out to the barn. He was back
in the house ten minutes later.

He
stormed in and told me get undressed.

“
Please,
Gideon. Just stop. I already said that I was sorry.”

His
pressed lips together tightly. “You will be sorry if you don't obey
me now.” He had murder in his eyes.

I
slowly started to undress. When I was naked, I looked at him.

“
Lay
over the bed.” His teeth were clenched together firmly.

Slowly,
I moved. I was scared. I thought he had punished me more than enough
for trying to run away.

Next
time, I would make sure that I got away.

I
had been right to leave.

The
tips on my fingers got hold of my pillow and I moved it into position
as Gideon stood there watching me with his stick in his hand.

I
looked at him, pleading with my eyes for him to reconsider.

I
received a cold stare back. I hoped he wasn't counting silently in
his head. That would mean a lot of extras.

He
whipped my entire body, the back of my legs, my bottom and my actual
back. I felt the sting of each blow. The ones that landed across
another stripe were unbearable, making me scream aloud.

He
yelled that the cow had died because of me. He accused me of being
selfish. It was pretty clear that he hated me now.

When
he was finished he left, locking the door behind him.

It
was obvious that the cow was more important than I was.

Gideon

After
Jessie's runaway attempt things changed. She did everything that I
wanted her to do, but she did it so quietly that I often felt like I
was living alone again. She never said anything unless I asked her
something, and she didn't talk to Pumpkin anymore either.

I
had broken her spirit. I hadn't meant to. I wanted her to know that I
wouldn't let her get away with crap like that.

Anything
could have happened to her. Of course she had gone the most dangerous
way. Personally, I felt that she was lucky that some hunter hadn’t
shot her. She had also endangered Pumpkin. That seemed to be a
routine with her. She just didn't think anything through before she
jumped into action. That was a trait that needed to be beaten out of
her.

When
I found the cow dead in the barn, I had snapped. I could have eased
the cow's passing if I had been there. But I wasn't, and she had
suffered unnecessarily. I was mad, and I wanted Jessie to feel that.

I
couldn't remember the last time I saw Jessie smile.

Even
at church, she was quiet. She didn't sing along with the hymns
anymore. She was depressed.

This
just wasn't what I had pictured married life to be like. I hadn't had
to punish her since she tried to run away.

One
day I came into the kitchen and found my Jessie cutting the bread for
our supper. She hadn't been eating much lately either. She was
sometimes dizzy, and in the mornings she refused to have breakfast. I
was guessing that she was expecting, but I didn't know if she knew.

I
stood right behind her, watching her work, glad that she was really
here when I came in. I was back to worrying about that. “That
smells really good.”

She
jumped. She hadn't heard me come in. Then she gasped and stepped away
from her work.

I
looked and saw that she had cut her hand. I took her to the sink and
tried to wash the cut, but it was so deep that fresh blood replaced
the blood I’d washed away. I wrapped her hand up in a couple of
towels and pulled her outside. She still hadn't said anything.

I
opened her car door for her.

“
But
there's no gas.” She was holding her cut hand up high with her
other hand wrapped around her wrist.

“
I
took care of that. Get in. I'm driving you to the doctor's.”

She
got into the car without a fight, and I closed her door carefully.

I
got in took off as fast as I could. “That cut doesn't look good. I
think you might need stitches.”

She
made noises like she might throw up. She was coughing, almost
choking. I'd ask the doctor about a possible pregnancy too.

My
brave big city wife was afraid of doctors. She put up quite a fuss
and couldn’t sit still.

The
doctor and I had to sit her down in a chair with her hand on the
operation table. My body was in between her body and the table. With
one hand I held her hand on the table and with the other I kept her
head turned away, so she couldn't watch the needle going in and out.
It really was a big gash. I was glad that the doctor had given her
something, so she wouldn't feel it.

Once
her hand was all finished, she fainted, giving me a chance to talk to
the doctor.

He
figured that she was pregnant too on hand from the things I told him.

We
talked a bit while we waited for her to wake up. He had been at the
wedding, and he wondered how we were doing. I wasn't sure what to
answer. Especially lately, we didn't actually talk to each other
except on Sundays, and she didn't ask anymore questions. I asked her
several to make sure that she was paying attention. She always had
that sad look in her eyes.

Would
a baby change that?

Jessica

I
woke up, asking myself where I was. It was clear that I wasn't at
home. I looked around and heard Gideon telling me to stay lying down,
but I was already sitting up. My head was spinning, and I was
reaching out. “Gideon?”

“
I'm
here, baby. I got you.” I felt his fingertips and worked my way
towards him, so I could hold his hand tightly.