Anathema (12 page)

His head jerks up, and he abruptly stands.
Behind him, I can see the faint shimmer of his wings. I've come to
realize that whenever he’s upset, he has less control over total
concealment. Not that it matters. I think I'm the only human who
has ever been able to recognize him for what he is.

"No, you aren't about to do this alone.
Period." His fingers ball into fists, and he shakes his head.

"Then I won't do it at all. This isn't a
compromise, Lev. Besides, I won't be by myself, and you know it.
Evan will be with me."

"No!" Lev snaps, shaking his head defiantly.
You need more than just Evan to be there."

I turn to Evan and shoot him a warning look
to get Lev to come to his senses; I'm not giving in on this battle.
I might have to do this, but I don't have to do it in a place where
I could hurt someone.

Evan looks from me to Lev and back before he
finally shakes his head. "I don't think you're going to win this
one, Lev. She's made up her mind, and she's the one who actually
has to do this. If she's willing to try, she's not being
unreasonable in what she is asking."

"You think not?" he growls. "The two of us
are the only ones standing between her and the Triune. She's asking
one of us to step aside, leaving only one line of defense to
protect her."

"No, I'm asking you not to put yourself in
danger. There's a difference!" I snap.

"Lev, it's her choice, and you have to
respect that."

While he might, I can tell by the way he's
glaring at me he's not happy about it. He folds his arms across his
chest and shakes his head, like he knows I'm making some huge
mistake. Maybe I am, but at least it won't get him killed.

"Fine. Whatever," he finally manages and
turns to the door. Without another word, he trudges inside and
slams the door. For a second, I want to burst out laughing at the
thought of an angelic temper tantrum, but that’d only make all this
worse.

"I don't think he much cared for that," I
murmur, still staring at the door.

"Can you blame him? He loves you, Elizabeth,
and he would do anything to protect you."

I shake my head and turn toward Evan. "Yeah,
but who’s going to protect him from me?"

"You've got a point," he murmurs, his gaze
turning back toward the heavens.

"All right. So now what do we do?"

"Head back to Knoxville to the community
center. It's still closed for renovation, and we can work through
the trance stage there."

I shudder and draw a shaky breath, still
trying to make that sound like something I want to try. "Do we have
to go there?"

"It's the perfect location, Elizabeth. We
have plenty of room to do whatever we need, and if the Triune finds
us there, we can plan a strategy to deal with them."

"I...just don't have good memories of that
place. I haven't been since...you know…."

He shakes his head. "Yeah, but it will be
okay. Are you willing to at least try?"

I nod , sensing I don't have much choice.
"Okay."

He points to my Jeep, and we start toward it.
I pause to fish my keys out, and he looks at me. "There is one more
thing you should be aware of."

"Which is?" I don't know why, but the way he
says that creeps me out.

"While you might be able to keep Lev out of
this stage of training, we will need him after you locate your
power."

I nod, but inside I'm far from agreeable.
Okay, maybe I've made stupid choices that have resulted in me being
a guinea pig, but that doesn't mean I'm willing to drag Lev into
the middle of it, no matter how bad it gets.

From outside the community center, it really
doesn't seem as though much has changed. The parking lot is
deserted, and the building is dark, so it's easy to tell it's
closed. But there’re no visible signs of what happened here the
night I almost died and angels were destroyed; it's like no battle
even occurred here. But I know better, and while I'm not a huge
believer in the supernatural side of things, falling in love with
an angel has definitely opened my eyes to the possibilities all
around me.

"I hate this place," I mutter as Evan comes
from around the passenger side of the Jeep to join me.

"I don't blame you for that."

I nod toward the locked door. "How are we
going to get inside?"

"Celia gave me her key." He sets his palm at
the middle of my back and nudges me forward. "Come on. Let's get
started."

"All right." I move stiffly forward, but my
gaze remains on the ground. This place gives me the creeps, if you
want to know the truth.

Evan pulls out his keys and unlocks the door.
He slips in first because he knows the layout of the place so much
better than I do, and I follow, pretty much in the dark until he
flips on the lights.

The hallway, as I remember, opens up in two
directions: one goes to the left and all the offices, the other to
the right opening into a full-sized basketball court, where I
decided stabbing myself with a holy relic would be a good idea. I'm
still trying to live that one down.

Still, even as I glance around, everything
pretty much looks the same, which really only makes this more
difficult. I mean, this whole damned thing resulted in changing my
life and destroying any chance I had with Lev, and yet the world
looks the same, at least from this angle. Why? Shouldn't it be as
scarred and damaged as I feel? Why am I the only one bearing the
brunt of this pain?

"Where are we going?" I ask. My gaze wants to
go toward the offices, but I have a feeling that's not the
direction my feet and body will be headed.

"To the court. It's more open, and that way,
should anything untoward happen, I have space to react
appropriately."

I shove my keys into my pocket and start
walking only because he's nudging me down the hallway yet
again.

Anyone who claims angels are patient needs to
have his head examined. I'm just saying....

"Do you think something will happen?" I ask,
trying to keep my voice much calmer than I feel.

"It's hard to say. I'm not really expecting
anything, but I am going to be prepared."

Folding my arms across my chest, I try not to
dwell on the fear eating me alive, but it's so hard.

"You know why I didn't want Lev to come,
didn't you?"

"Because you wanted a living angel?" he
smirks, and under other circumstances, I’d see what would remind me
of a family resemblance between Evan and Lev if they really were
father and son. As it is, I just have to assume it's because they
know each other so well.

"So you think I'm being over-protective?" I
glare at him, not at all liking the way he finds this amusing.

"Not at all. You've had some pretty bad
experiences. But you have to remember that Lev can take care of
himself."

I shrug. "Yeah, well, I’ll just bet Jayzee
thought she could take care of herself, too, but things didn't
exactly work out for her did they?"

Lev is much older than Jayzee or Sarah—older
and more experienced.”

"Good to know," I mutter, still not
convinced.

As we step into the gym, I see signs of what
happened. Lots of tiles from the ceiling are missing and the
insulation hangs through the gaping holes. Some of the light
fixtures are broken. There are sizeable scorch marks on the floor,
and places stained by blood.

My blood.

I step back and run into Evan.

"Sorry," I whisper, suddenly trembling like
crazy.

"You all right?" Evan gently takes my arm. I
don't know if it's because he thinks I'm going to pass out or run
away. Either way, does it really matter?

"I...hate this place."

He nods. "I know. But we won't be here
forever."

I point to the blood. "Why hasn't anyone
cleaned that up?"

He shrugs. "They've tried. Several times. The
problem is, the blood apparently fused with the magical properties
of your gift, and there is no way to remove the stain short of
tearing out the floor, and right now the center, like every other
business, is just struggling to stay afloat, Elizabeth."

He’s got a point; I know he does. I just
can't seem to make myself stop staring at it—at the floor. And then
my mind plays back those moments when Lev was tied in that chair
and I almost destroyed him. Kane almost won.

It was so close, and right now I'm having
trouble breathing. Evan gently grabs my arm and nods toward the
stain.

"I know what you are thinking, and there is
no point in going there. That part is over. But there's still a
whole lot of things we need to get through right now."

I force myself to take a deep, cleansing
breath and meet his gaze. "All right. I'm ready to get this show on
the road. What do you want me to do?"

"It would probably be easier if you lie on
the floor. Your body might be more relaxed and go into the
trance-like state more quickly."

"Okay." I sit on the floor and eventually lie
back. "Did I mention the floor is hard?"

"Nope, but thanks for letting me know."
Evan's arms dangle awkwardly at his sides, and I'm wondering if the
reason they seem to look so odd is that he's so tense.

"How sure are you that you'll be able to
block whatever I might throw at you?"

He shrugs. "I guess we'll have to see, won't
we. Now close your eyes."

I clench my eyes shut, but even though I try
to relax, my heart is jack hammering in my chest, and all I can
hear is the racing of my pulse in my temples.

"You're going to have to relax, "Elizabeth.
We definitely don't want to find the power center when you are
stressing; I don't know what will happen, if we do."

"I'm trying," I growl. "It's not as easy as
it looks, you know."

"You sure you don't want me to call Lev?"

"No!" I snap. "Just give me a minute." Yet I
know he's right. Lev could calm me in two seconds. Then again, he
could be dead right after. No thanks.

I try to focus on letting my body turn to
jelly, which isn't easy on a hardwood floor. Carpet would
definitely have been better, but for some reason Evan thinks he
needs a wide open space, and I'm not about to question him. He
knows more about the dagger and its power than I do so whatever he
says short of trying to get Lev anywhere close I’m good with.

My heart rate finally start to slow, and the
cramping that’s been nagging my left shoulder finally eases. Of
course, the side-effect of all this relaxation is that it makes me
want to sleep, and that's the last thing I need to think about.
Sleeping isn't going to find this power.

"How is it coming?" I hear Evan's voice, but
this time, it's in my thoughts, probably his way of keeping me from
stirring from this state.

"It's starting to work. I'm not nearly as
tense."

"Okay, now I want you to think about how the
world looked when the power seized you. Focus on what that was
like."

"You don't expect miracles or anything," I
mutter.

"I'm not expecting anything you can't handle,
Elizabeth. You are an extraordinary girl. You knew what Lev was
before he ever revealed himself. You can do this."

I wish I had the assurance he seems to
possess. Still, I think about how my vision shifted from all the
colors to grey before the white outlines of angelic bodies
appeared.

"Keep focusing," Evan urges in my mind. "That
is the key to being able to find your way."

At first, nothing happens except my head
starts to ache, which makes me want to stop, but I can't; I have to
see this through.

As I think of the shift that occurred right
before the power took over, I start to notice the slightest waver
in my perception. My mind locks onto the brilliant white I remember
from Jayzee's form, and even though part of me wants to squirm away
and banish the thoughts from my mind, I force myself to hold on,
knowing that while it is difficult, I can feel something. It has to
be the power.

"Elizabeth? Do you feel anything
different?"

"A little." I swallow hard

"Try opening your eyes."

My shoulders want to stiffen as I hear his
command, but I force myself not to react. I have to hold onto the
calm, or the power will consume me, and nothing good with come from
that, even if Evan can keep himself safe. Taking one last deep,
cleansing breath, I force my eyes to open.

The grey is there, which is when my heart
starts jumping and I snap my eyes shut. I don't want to see Evan
standing there, the white glow giving him away. I don't want to
feel his presence near me because I know what could happen.

"Keep your eyes open, Elizabeth," Evan
orders.

"I don't want to hurt you," I whisper.

"You won't. You have to trust me."

I know he's right, but he sure wasn't around
when I killed Jayzee. He didn't feel the power surge through him,
destroying her so completely while he was forced to watch. He can't
begin to know what that was like. I was horrified, and she was an
enemy; if I killed Evan, it would be worse.

"I can take care of myself, Elizabeth. You
have to do this."

"All right," I manage, forcing myself to
re-open my eyes. Around me, the world unfolds in shades of grey; I
haven't raised my gaze to find Evan yet, so everything looks the
same.

"Listen for my voice. Stand and look at
me."

I bite my bottom lip and pull myself upright
before turning my head in Evan's direction, praying he's as safe as
he thinks he is.

Immediately, the white heat of his form
surges into view, and I gasp. It's not that I wasn't prepared to
find him but rather that I can feel something jump inside me. My
hand starts rising.

"Think about the grey beside me, Elizabeth;
try to override the white of my form."

My arm is straight now, and I know what's
coming. He's crazy to think I have some way of controlling this.
Still, I ignore the brilliant white of his form and focus on the
grey. It's really hard when I see the same white of his form
starting to glow in my fingertips, a hint of what’s to come.