His Ever After (Love Square) (17 page)

“She’s in surgery now. They need to repair the break and close the wound. I’m freaking out. I’m so glad you came.” She wipes her eyes with her hands and steps away when Candace presses her body between us, burrowing into my side.

“Hey, squirt. You going to be alright?” I ask, as I bend down to scoop her up.

Candace rests her head on my shoulder and nods against it while clinging tightly to me. I wouldn’t be the least bit surprised if seeing her sister that way has traumatized her. I stroke her head and whisper reassuringly to her.

“How long has she been in surgery for?”

“A couple of hours now. We should hear something soon. Or at least I assume we will. I know this is a routine procedure for them, but I can’t stop picturing my baby lying on a table with people cutting into her.” Emma wipes stray tears falling down her face.

“It will be okay. Uncle Jacob’s here, right?” I give Candace a little tickle and walk over to the chairs where Betty is sitting.

“Betty, you doing alright?” I ask the older woman, while kissing her cheek in greeting.

“I’m holding up. It’s good to see you again. Just wish it was under better circumstances.” She smiles at me, as I sit down in the chair across from her and tuck Candace into my lap.

We wait silently, with the television in the corner being the only sound in the room. I feel Candace’s weight start to relax into me, while I gently rock her, and I know she’s probably fallen asleep.

I stay seated when the doctor comes in to update Emma on Grace’s condition. Emma jumps up and runs to the doorway to meet the doctor, anxious for the news. It’s hard to make out all their words from where I’m seated. Judging from her more relaxed posture, I would assume that everything went okay.

As I watch Emma talking with the doctor, a small thought starts to niggle at my brain. I’ve spent the last month in a haze thanks to booze and a lack of sleep, but something about that ball being in the tree really starts to bother me. Like an idea or thought that’s right there, but you can’t quite grasp it. I struggle for several minutes trying to place it, unable to bring it to the forefront of my brain. I shake my head in frustration and decide to let it go. These things have a way of coming to you when you least expect it.

Emma comes back and joins us, looking a lot more put together than she did before the doctor came in. Her face doesn’t look as worried and her eyes don’t look as sad.

“She’s in recovery. Everything went well. She’ll need to wear a cast for a while. Luckily, it was her left arm so she’ll still be able to write and what not. I love my daughters, but I stopped wiping their butts when I potty trained them.” She smiles and gives a short laugh before continuing, “Anyways, we’ll be able to go and see her once she wakes up and they move her to a private room. Hopefully, she’ll be able to go home tomorrow.”

“That’s great. I’m glad she is going to be okay,” I mutter into Candace’s hair after kissing her sleeping head.

“I’m going to run downstairs and grab a cup of coffee. You two want anything?” Betty asks, as she rises out of her chair.

“I’d love a cup. I’ll go with you. I need to move. I’m antsy sitting here waiting,” Emma replies, following suit and standing.

“I’m good. You guys go. I’ll stay here and hold down the fort,” I say to their retreating forms.

I look at the clock on the opposite side of the room and wish it was later in the day. I’m exhausted and would love nothing more than to sleep for a few hours. I wasn’t lying when I said my haze is partially due to a lack of sleep. Thoughts of Brooke still torment me. Even in death, she won’t let me go. I know it’s the price I have to pay for all my sins and bad deeds. I just wish I didn’t have to suffer twenty-four hours a day. A little break once in a while would be nice.

Now I have even more thoughts about Brooke to consume me, thanks to those damn journals. I was so worried about Grace that I haven’t taken any more time to mull over any of the things I learned last night while reading them. I hate to speak ill of the dead, but that bitch was crazy. Seriously crazy. They say love makes people do ugly things. I guess they weren’t kidding.

I’m itching to know more of the story. More of my story, I guess you could say. It is mind boggling that there are so many things about my own life that I have no idea about. You think you know someone. You think you are in control of your own destiny, and then –
Bam
– one day you realize you were nothing more than a puppet on someone else’s strings. When that happens, your first instinct is to snip the strings and kick the shit out of the puppeteer. That hasty decision won’t get you anywhere. You need to assert control and show the puppeteer whose boss. I refuse to be someone’s fool. I might have played that role unwittingly, but today is a new day, and I will prevail.

Emma and Betty come back into the room and Emma hands me a cup of coffee.

“I figured you could use it,” she murmurs, while grabbing her bags off the chair next to me. “I just ran into the doctor. Grace is in her own room, so we can go and see her for a few minutes.”

When I shift to stand, Candace wakes up. After a few moments, I put her down and let her lean on me until she is fully awake. We all head down the hall and make our way to the wing where Grace’s room is.

I’m last to walk into the room and am immediately taken aback by how small and frail Grace looks in the hospital bed with an IV coming out of her arm. Her eyes are partially opened. I imagine she’s having a hard time staying awake with anesthesia still coursing through her tiny body.

“How you feeling, baby?” Emma asks lovingly and caresses her daughter’s cheek.

“Tired, Momma. Am I going to be okay?” Grace replies just above a whisper.

“You are, baby. Why don’t you close your eyes and go to sleep. When you wake up, we’ll talk about what you were doing in that tree.”

Grace nods her head and within seconds falls back to sleep.

“Betty is going to stay here while I get Candace settled back at home. Do you mind staying with her tonight, Jacob? I don’t want to leave Grace alone all night.” Emma’s question distractedly pulls my attention from a peaceful looking Grace. If it wasn’t for the pink cast on her arm and the bruise on her forehead, you wouldn’t know she just went through surgery.

“Of course. Anything you need.” I walk over to the bed and kiss Grace’s forehead softly and whisper in here ear, “Love you, sweet cheeks. Sleep as snug as a bug in a rug.”

Back at the door, I gesture for Emma and Candace to precede me and say farewell to Betty.

***

Walking into the hospital, I immediately head for the elevator with Candace’s tiny hand wrapped around mine. We ride up to the third floor and make our way to Grace’s room.

Emma called an hour ago and said that Grace was going to be released later that afternoon, once the doctor signed the discharge papers. She told us to stay home and wait, but we all know that doctors are rarely, if ever, timely when you are waiting for them. Candace and I were going stir crazy waiting for them. It didn’t take long for me to say fuck it and head over.

When Candace runs into the room, I notice Emma standing off to the side of the hallway talking on the phone. Her eyes are bright, and she’s smiling at whatever the other person is saying to her. Emma visibly startles when she sees me heading her way and lowers her voice.

“Thanks for calling. Let’s get together next weekend for coffee. Bye,” she all but whispers into the phone before putting it in her pocket.

“Who was that?” I gesture to her phone.

“No one. I thought you were staying back at the house?” She asks trying to conceal who was on the other line.

“We were bored. Why aren’t you telling me who was on the phone? Are you hiding something?”

Her face pales and her eyes dart to my shoulder. “I’m not hiding anything,” she scoffs at me.

Oh, God. Please don’t tell me Emma is having an affair. I know all about the quiet, hidden phone calls and the guilty looks when you’re found talking to someone you shouldn’t be. I used to catch Sam on the phone with Aiden all the time. She would instantly lower her voice or stumble her words. Afterward, she would try to play it off. I wonder if she ever did that with her fuckwad husband when she was talking to me.

“Emma, you know you can tell me anything right? No judgment whatsoever?” She nods her head at me and shifts restlessly on her feet. What she doesn’t do is confide in me.

“Are you having an affair?” I ask her, praying that she isn’t. John is the best thing to ever happen to her. They met right after college, and he quickly tamed her, reining in her spontaneous, wild child ways. They balance each other perfectly, and I only hope I’m lucky enough to have what they have someday.

“An affair?” She asks incredulously.

“Yeah, an affair. You’ve been acting suspiciously and cagey ever since I saw you on the phone. You wouldn’t act that way if you weren’t hiding something. So tell me, sister, what are you hiding?” I demand to know. If she’s in trouble, I need to get her to see reason.

“God. Are you always so damn pushy?” She asks, her voice rising with ire.

“Yes. I’m trained to sniff out bullshit from a mile away. Don’t think I’m going to let you off the hook.”

“Fine. You want to know who I was talking to?” I nod, so she continues and rocks my world at the same time. “Kara, alright? I was talking to Kara.”

I lean back against the wall, speechless with this turn of events. I never would have suspected my sister would be talking to my… whatever Kara is. This can only end in disaster. The last time I saw Kara was the day I propositioned her with a threesome. I close my eyes and sigh loudly.

“I didn’t know you two were friends,” I state warily.

“We’ve talked frequently since she stayed at the house a few months back. She’s a nice girl, Jacob.” My sister looks at me pointedly, and I have a feeling she knows how poorly I treated Kara.

“Don’t get any ideas. Kara is a nice girl, but she’s someone else’s nice girl. We’re like oil and water. Never the two shall mix.” I scrub my hands down my face, praying this conversation is over soon. There are some things that you just don’t want to discuss with your sister. I really hope she doesn’t know all of the gory details.

“You know, I pray all the time that you’ll find your way, little brother. You’ve lost a lot and none of it is your fault. You keep blaming yourself and refusing to move on. You have a good thing right in front of your face. A good, strong woman who would walk through fire if you’d give her the chance. She’d be your partner, taking your back and soothing your soul when you need it. And boy do you need it. Promise me you’ll open your eyes before it’s too late. Before you wake up sad and alone, realizing that your whole life has passed you by and you missed out on the joy of love and family.”

Emma leaves me with those final words. If only it was that easy to find redemption.

***

Around five-thirty that evening, Grace was finally released from the hospital. I was roped into stopping at a Redbox kiosk to get a movie and picking up pizza on my way back to the house. Both girls chose to go with Emma. It’s amazing to see how special Candace and Grace’s bond is. Even though most of the time they argue, as soon as Grace got hurt, Candace didn’t want to leave her side. It reminds me a lot of Emma and me when we were younger. She was always taking care of me.

After her lecture in the hallway, I avoided any real in depth conversations with Emma. I know she means well, but she still has no idea how badly I fucked up by sleeping with Brooke. When I tell her about what I learned in those journals, she is going to lose it. Emma is a fierce momma bear when she needs to be. I might be a thirty-four year old man, but that doesn’t mean shit when she gets a wild hair to protect me.

Initially, I wasn’t going to tell her about the extent of Brooke’s deception. It’s humiliating to know I was played so badly. My male pride is taking a beating with this whole thing. The more I think about it, the more I know I need to tell someone what happened. I could tell Brad and he’d sympathize, but I don’t want to look like such a weak pussy.

I always wondered why people hid the fact that they were victims of crime. Wouldn’t you want justice for yourself? Now that I am the victim, I totally get it. No one wants to show their vulnerability and gullibility. It makes you feel pathetic and used.

“I’m back,” I call out, walking into the house. Grace is propped up on the couch sipping juice, while Candace sits on the floor. Both of them are watching their favorite Disney show,
Jessie
, on television.

“Yay!” Candace jumps up and grabs the bag with the soda and movie from my hand.

“How are you feeling, sweet cheeks?” I ask Grace while walking through the room.

“Better. It doesn’t hurt so much right now.” She looks down at her cast and back up at me. “Will you sign my cast? Momma got me some markers.” She gestures to a couple markers lying on the table.

“After dinner I will. You want a slice of pizza?” I ask, standing in front of her.

“Yes, please.” She smiles sweetly at me, and it breaks my heart that I haven’t been there for her.

“Sit tight. I’ll be back in a flash,” I murmur against her hair and press my lips there.

After dishing out the pizza, we all settle around the living room alternately talking and watching an episode of some really horrendous reality show about a little girl known for doing beauty pageants. I shake my head at how much television programming has gone down the toilet. I’m surprised Emma is letting them watch this garbage.

“Grace, I think it’s time you explain what you were doing up in that tree. I told you to wait for your father to come home and you disobeyed me,” Emma lectures Grace.

“I’m sorry, Momma. These mean boys threw my ball up there and I couldn’t get it down. I tried throwing things at it, but I couldn’t reach it. It’s my favorite ball. All I wanted to do was play with it,” Grace replies quietly. Smart girl. When you’re in trouble, keep a low profile.

“That’s fine, baby. But why didn’t you wait? Or explain to me how important it was?”