Read Diana in Search of Herself Online
Authors: Sally Bedell Smith
50
Attenborough worked with: Mi, 10/17/85; DM, 4/24/89
51
x“Well, obviously. You feel … No, we don’t”: DM, 10/21/85; Mi, 10/21/85
52
“friendly tiff”: DM, 10/21/85
53
“What a smashing”: Mi, 10/21/85
54
“Di and Charles are so”: Sun, 10/21/85
55
“unbelievable cleavage”: B-JD, p. 471 (PC letter 11/13/85 to unnamed recipient)
56
Their four-minute number: Mi, 12/23/85; DS, 12/24/85
57
“provocative and sensuous”:
People
, “The Diana Years” (1997), p. 115
58
“terrific” dancer:
Hello!
, 11/29/97
59
“was in sparkling form”: Sun, 6/4/85
60
Charles had also resumed: B-JD, p. 480
61
The rapprochement with Kanga: DM, 10/24/85; SuPe, 6/2/86
62
“blue with jealousy”: Interview with Nicholas Haslam
63
“Camilla had a fallout”: Interview with Stuart Higgins
64
He was an unlikely prospect: B-WB, p. 25
65
“the love of my life”: Anthony Holden,
Charles: A Biography
(1998), p. 204
66
Mannakee had been warned: B-WB, p. 25
67
Nevertheless, Diana was disheartened: Holden, pp. 198–99
68
“I don’t want to spy”: B-JD, p. 482 (PC letter 2/11/87 to unnamed recipient)
69
“There appeared … to disintegrate”: B-JD, pp. 477–79
70
“started to withdraw”: Ibid., p. 479
71
“bat ears”: Sun, 5/7/86
72
“plastic smile”: Mi, 5/8/86
73
“I didn’t know anything”: B-AM1, p. 45
74
“My husband told me off”: Ibid., pp. 55–56
75
“Even together … they were apart”: B-JD, p. 480
76
they kept different: Descriptions of Charles and Diana’s domestic discord are based on confidential interviews, as well as: Sun, 8/13/86; B-WB, pp. 5, 12, 28, 35, 43, 45, 53
77
“desperation”: B-JD, p. 480 (PC letter 11/18/86 to unnamed recipient)
78
“I never thought it would”: Ibid., p. 481 (PC letter 2/11/87 to unnamed recipient)
79
“the warmth, the understanding”: Ibid.
80
“knowledge … cared about our marriage”: Pano, p. 14
81
other staff understood: B-WB, pp. 12, 57; B-PJ2, p. 103
82
“the change of behavior pattern”: Pano, p. 15
83
“a certain woman”: B-PT, p. 25
84
“It’s agony to know”: B-JD, p. 479 (PC letter 3/11/86 to unnamed recipient)
85
“the whole royal ‘setup,’ ”: B-PT, p. 28
86
“berating Charles for seeing”: Ibid., pp. 29, 33
87
“pretty devastating”: Pano, p. 14
88
“terrified”: B-AP, p. 121
89
“spent my whole time … letting them see it”: B-AM1, pp. 50–51
90
“She was teary and … out of sorts”: B-SF, p. 98
91
Richard Foster had spent:
Hello!
, 11/22/97
92
“She was tense down to”: ST, 11/1/98
93
“after five years of being … tell her”: B-AM1, pp. 54–55
94
But she recalled …“he just gave me”: Ibid., p. 56
95
A footman at Balmoral: B-WB, p. 49
96
“Friends on my husband’s side”: Pano, p. 15
97
“matchmaker Diana”: B-SF, p. 69
98
abetted by Diana and Charles: Mi, 12/24/85; B-WB, p. 38
99
She once said that the royal family: B-AM1, pp. 61, 64
100
“tried to lacerate me”: B-AM2, p. 65
101
“[Charles’s] grandmother is always”: Sun, 8/24/92
102
“Diana sometimes said”: Interview with Roberto Devorik
103
“something troubling”: B-AM1, p. 53
104
initially got on well: B-WB, pp. 33, 109
105
“pique”: DM, 1/23/85; DEx, 12/22/84
106
“Her Royal Rudeness”:
Time
, 2/28/83
107
“rattle her cage”: B-AM1, p. 54
108
“hopping mad and quite”: Mi, 3/24/82
109
“country gentry”: Biographical material on Sarah Ferguson is drawn primarily from her memoir,
My Story
.
110
“kept rearing her head”: B-AM1, p. 58
111
“set me free”: B-SF, p. 3
112
“I was robust and jolly”: Ibid., pp. 97–98
113
“Why can’t you be more”: Ibid.
114
“It must have been hell”: Ibid., p. 75
115
“Diana felt the Queen”: Interview with Roberto Devorik
116
“our common interests”: B-SF, p. 97
117
After listening … “maybe I ought”: B-AM1, p. 58
118
“flavor of the month”: B-SF, p. 119
119
“a tower of strength”: Mi, 5/15/86
120
“near obsession about how”: DEx, 5/8/86
121
“the cold indifference”: Mi, 5/15/86
122
“I don’t know why there”: Sun 5/10/86
123
“It doesn’t matter what”: DS, 7/3/86
124
“fasts and feasts”: Sun, 5/12/86
125
“weeping self-doubts”: NOTW, 5/11/86
126
“Nothing like a touch of”: NOTW, 8/10/86
127
“Having a wonderful time”: SuPe, 8/10/86
128
“Recent worries about”: To, 8/11/86
129
“for the things she enjoys”: Sun, 8/13/86
130
“Whether that was bad”: Interview with Stuart Higgins
131
“Charles spends long hours”: NOTW, 8/3/86
132
Charles lightly cuffed: NOTW, 8/3/86; Sun, 8/13/86
133
“Diana seemed to be permanently”: DM, 9/24/86
134
“I never got any O levels”: Ibid.
135
“I just come and talk”: NYT
Magazine
, 2/21/88
1
In November 1986: Descriptions of Diana’s affair with James Hewitt are drawn primarily from his “as told to” memoir,
Princess in Love
, by Anna Pasternak.
2
“as if no other woman”: DT, 4/7/98
3
Diana and Charles had successfully toured: DM, 11/22/86
4
“It wasn’t a typical seduction”: DEx, 9/3/98
5
“Charles was involved with Camilla”: DM, 11/28/98
6
“I always want the unobtainable”: Sun, 1/12/98
7
for which he compensated: DM, 11/28/98
8
“I couldn’t read and assumed”: Ibid.
9
“I had red hair, was short”: Ibid.
10
During his school days, Hewitt used: Ibid.
11
“He lost his trust in people”: B-AP, p. 55
12
as a “decoy,” Emma later said: DT, 4/7/98
13
“was holding long whispered”: Ibid.
14
“She let her fingers mingle”: B-AP, p. 86
15
he had “trusted” the Oxford-educated: DEx, 9/3/98
16
“vaguely, socially”:
You
magazine, 9/20/98
17
it was widely ridiculed: DEx, 9/3/98
18
“Yes, I adored him”: Pano, p. 27
19
“factual evidence”: Ibid., p. 26
20
“there was a lot of fantasy”: Ibid., p. 27
21
“She knew that somewhere”: B-AP, p. 75
22
“It was with James Hewitt’s unswerving”: Ibid., p. xiii
23
“spent hours lying in bed”: Ibid., pp. 87–88
24
“I was with her because”: DM, 11/28/98
25
“release from the tension”: B-AP, p. 34
26
“emotional roller coaster”: Ibid., p. 171
27
In the beginning she would sit: Ibid., p. 156
28
“violent paroxysms of despair”: Ibid., p. 171
29
“struck her as a form”: Ibid., p. 170
30
“he had never seen anyone so distraught”: Ibid., p. 138
31
“Often she felt as if she was perching”: Ibid., p. 142
32
“lack of control … unmitigated greed”: Ibid., p. 117
33
he couldn’t reveal: Ibid., pp. 124–25
34
“I view depression as a sign”: DM, 11/28/98
35
“Some people go to psychiatrists”: DEx, 9/3/98
36
Diana expressed her affection: DM, 7/18/91; ES, 9/13/92
37
“head to foot”: Sun, 8/24/92
38
At least one maid worried: B-WB, p. 87
39
“she would try anything to win”: B-AP, p. 126
40
“an attempt by others”: Interview with David Puttnam
41
she began to tell Hewitt she hated: B-AP, p. 127
42
When their guests arrived: B-WB, p. 66
43
“That is the total agony”: B-JD, p. 477 (PC letter 10/24/87 to unnamed recipient)
44
stripped of the basic civility: NOTW, 9/20/87
45
“an obsession for her”: B-AP, p. 160
46
then retreat to her room: B-WB, p. 69
47
“the biggest story they’d ever”: R&R-Doc, Part II, p. 24
48
“a version of the facts”: B-JD, p. 574
49
The first significant clue: DEx, DS, DM, 2/12/87
50
“the last time we were close”: B-AM1, p. 50
51
Charles had resumed: NOTW, 12/28/86; DT, 8/28/86
52
invariably prompted rebukes: B-JD, p. 483
53
hinted unfairly and incorrectly: Ibid., p. 482; DM, 10/19/87
54
“eclipsed by the Princess, resentful”: B-JD, p. 476
55
“I can’t see a light”: Ibid., p. 483 (PC letter 10/24/87 to unnamed recipient)
56
“unable to turn to his parents”: Ibid., p. 476
57
“When marriages break down”: Ibid., p. 480
58
tried to get Charles to build: B-WB, pp. 46–47
59
“The very fact that she felt”: B-AP, p. 142
60
“slashed … adjusted to hide the damage”: B-PJ2, p. 137
61
“She was like the sun coming up”: TNY, 9/15/97
62
“undignified”: DM, 2/18/87
63
“black lover”: ST, 9/23/90
64
she smirked while reviewing: B-PT, p. 44; B-SF, p. 124
65
“sexy” Diana … “grumpy” Charles: DS, 2/23/87
66
Diana’s bulimia had again: B-AP, pp. 144–45
67
Waterhouse and Dunne: SuPe, 6/28/87; DM, 11/2/88; MOS, 2/17/91
68
“mystery fat man”: NOTW, 6/28/87
69
“stormed off”: Ibid., 6/21/87
70
“in a huff”: DM, 6/21/87
71
The tabloids castigated: Sun, 6/23/87
72
“We are
not
having”: Ibid.
73
“frequent visitor to Kensington”: B-JD, p. 481
74
Waterhouse also visited: B-WB, p. 82
75
“repeatedly tried to reassure”: B-AP, p. 260
76
which especially galled: B-JD, pp. 476, 482
77
accused Diana: B-WB, p. 60
78
“positive hurricane”: B-JD, p. 483 (PC letter 10/24/87 to unnamed recipient)
79
They spent several weekends: B-WB, pp. 78, 80; SuMi, 2/14/88
80
A group of advisers: NYT
Magazine
, 2/21/88
81
“Disco Di,” the femme fatale: DM, 9/25/87
82
“so many cock-ups … stop fighting”: B-AM1, p. 64
83
“rediscover the real”: Ibid., p. 157
84
“comparatively civilized ‘space’ ”: B-PT, p. 52
85
“They were back in sparkling”: SuMi, 2/14/88
86
“glanced affectionately at his wife”: DM, 1/27/88
87
“she now hated with a vitriolic”: B-AP, p. 166
88
they appeared to their staff more calm: B-WB, p. 84
89
“worse than her usual melancholy”: B-AP, p. 185
90
Charles acted heroically: Ti, 3/12/88
91
“He just pushed me aside”: B-PT, p. 61
92
She insisted that they take: B-AM1, p. 60
93
“so inadequate in every”: Ibid.
94
“We cried for Prince Charles”: DEx, 3/15/88
95
“the beginning of a slow process”: B-AM1, p. 161
96
Back in England with Hewitt: B-AP, p. 186
97
She lashed out: Ibid., p. 191
98
“most beautiful woman … found her attractive”: Ibid., p. 193
99
She said that her skin: B-AM1, p. 61
100
But by 1988, people had begun: Interview with William Haseltine
101
“painfully thin, almost gaunt”: To, 3/25/88
102
“suddenly woke up”: B-AM1, p. 61
103
“sweetheart … four or five”: Ibid.
104
“born again”: Ibid.
105
“finished”: Ibid., p. 60
106
suffered from the symptoms in 1990: Ibid., p. 61
107
who only overcame: WO, 4/8/78
1
“She’d never ask if she”: Sun, 1/15/98
2
“tended to seek out people”: B-PT, p. 207
3
“from one person to another”: B-JK, p. 78
4
“immediately began to pour”: Sun, 1/15/98
5
“easily defeated … strong character”: B-AM1, p. 208
6
“What is going to happen”: Sun, 1/15/98
7
“believe [astrology] totally”: B-AM1, p. 66