Love Reflection (Entwined Hearts #1) (20 page)

“Nothing to say man… nothing to say. It’s all about what you do from now on.”

“Yeah, don’t I know it.”

“See you soon?”

“Thursday my flight leaves, so probably Friday.”

“Okay. Good. I’m glad we’re all back,” he says quietly.

“Me too. But Saul, you need to know, there’s a guy the girls are spending a lot of time with. I thought him and Pea... well, I thought they were gonna be something. Pea told me no. I’m still not sure, it’s not like I can call her out on it. Anyway, I mentioned it again the other night. She said she thinks there’s something with Soph and him.”

He doesn’t say anything for a second, but it’s like I can hear his jaw working.

“What’s his name,” he says and it sounds like it’s through gritted teeth.

“Dane.” I hear him suck his breath in.

“What?” He has me concerned now. If this Dane guy is a dick, I’ll be getting an earlier flight home.

“He works with Soph. She had a thing with him before. She got attached, I thought he was out of the picture for good.”

This surprises me. Firstly that Soph got attached, the only guy’s Soph has even gotten attached to is me and Saul and I know with me it’s in a purely platonic friendship. I also know that there’s something deeper with those two. Unfortunately, they’re both too stubborn to do anything about it. Also they’re too alike both worried about ruining their friendship, and both convinced they can’t do relationships. I think they can both do relationships, they just have to find the right fit for them before it’s worth them trying. Whether they’re the right fit for each other or not, I haven’t got a clue. I’d like to think they could make each other happy, but truthfully, they could just as easily rip each other apart.

“Right, okay, well he’s in the girls’ lives and to be honest the way they both speak about him, I don’t think he’s going anywhere, anytime soon.”

“Hmm,” is all Saul says. “Later bud,” he says.

“Later,” I reply.

I get up and realise I’m still only half dressed in boxers and jeans and nothing else, and that it’s getting late. I throw on a Henley, socks and boots, grab my jacket, phone and keys making sure I’ve got the cash in my pocket and head out.

Today, I finally tie up all my loose ends at work, ready for my move back home. Now, however, I have what feels like an elephant sitting on my chest after Saul’s comments about Pea. I rub my chest as I head out to the elevator. Oh well, it’s not going to change a thing. I’ll love Pea until I die... and probably beyond, whether I want to or not.

Something is weird with Saul. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but it’s like he’s pissed, but it’s mainly aimed at Soph. I can’t work out what his issue is. Of course, Soph has pulled me to one side more than once since we arrived at the hospital an hour ago to ask if I’ve noticed, and what do I think is wrong with him. She’s now convinced he’s pissed because she didn’t come to visit him, but then wouldn’t he be snippy with me as well, although he is definitely worse with her.

“Soph, seriously… stop worrying. He’s probably just grouchy. Wouldn’t you be if you’d been stuck in this place?” Saul was all ready to leave then the nurse came round and said he couldn’t go until the doctor had signed him off. We’ve been sitting and waiting ever since and it’s obviously pissing Saul off. The nurse definitely has a thing for Saul, the way she’s eyeing him. I’m sure it’s outside of hospital policy and Soph shoots her daggers. If Saul wasn’t so pissed and this wasn’t a hospital, I’d have laughed at the scene before me.

“Yeah, I guess,” she sighs.

“Come on, let’s take these shitty coffees back to Saul and wait until we can go.”

She shrugs but follows me back to his room.

“What took you two so long?” Saul questions.

“There was an old man in front of us,” I say.

He just looks at us with his lips thinned and a scowl on his forehead. He’s still beautiful and even though he’s being an arse, for what appears to be no reason, I just want to go and hug him.
I wonder if the feeling of elation I get when I look at him will ever go away?
I can’t believe we nearly lost him. I look over at the two of them from my place next to the window overlooking London. Soph is sitting on the edge of the bed, even through his scowl he can’t help but look at her. When he looks away to talk to me or acknowledge a nurse, Soph sneaks glances at him. It’s actually quite comical.

These two people are my family. I’d be lost without them. Hell, I’d be alone without them. They’re everything to me. Dane is quickly becoming someone I include in the family bracket and I obviously include Con in that. I just wish with all my heart he was here. I miss him more every day, and when the realisation flashed through me yesterday that it will always be him and only him for me, it just made me miss him more.

I decided yesterday. I’m going to him.

I have some savings, not much, about £1500. I checked British Airways flights the other day, a one-way flight to New York was £1100. I need more money. I need to make sure I have enough money to come back, as well as support myself long enough to find a job should I end up staying. I know I will be able to stay at Con’s. I mean that’s kind of the point, but what if I turn up and he’s with another woman, I couldn’t stay then, I couldn’t see him with someone else, every day, in my face. I grab my stomach, it aches just at that thought and I can feel myself having to pull my emotions in check before they go berserk.

“Pea?” Saul asks and it’s the first time since we’ve been here that his voice is truly soft with either of us, he's truly being himself.

“Sorry Saul, just drifting, but I was drifting somewhere that I should stay away from.” I smile and walk over to his bed sitting down next to him, the other side from Soph and I lean into him.

“I love you, Saul, truly I do. You’re like my brother and my best friend.” Soph coughs and I laugh. “You both are.” I shake my head and smile as I look back into Saul’s eyes. “I know you’re okay.” I look him over. “You’re going to be okay.” Then I look up to Soph. “You’re going to be okay too. I need to go to him. I need to tell him. I need to fight for him. My life ends with him or it ends alone. There’s no third option.” I realise Saul is holding my hand.

“Will you stay around this week? Help me get settled back into life?” he asks.

“Of course I will, I mean I can’t go yet anyway. I only have £1500 and I’ve worked out I need at least £4000 just to be able to go and return, and that’s hoping he will let me stay at his apartment,” when I say that, I can still feel the unease slither through my gut from the thoughts I had only moments ago.

“We’ll help you, whatever you need,” Saul tells me.

I squeeze his hand. “Thanks, Saul, but this is something I need to do myself. I want him to know I’ve put the effort in. Hell, I want him to know he’s worth it.”

Just then the doctor comes in. She happens to be a young woman and she obviously also has a thing for Saul as she eyes both Soph and I sitting on either side of him.

“Shall we give Mr. James some space so I can examine him?”

Soph glares at her but gets up, I just get up smiling. The doctor pulls the curtain around Saul and does whatever it is she needs too.

At one point, I hear her saying, “My, you must be really sporty to have such a nice physique.” And I can’t help snort-laughing. When she comes out of the curtain, she gives us pointed glares and stomps off. Both Soph and I burst out laughing, then Saul pulls the curtain back with a big grin.

“I’m free and clear!” he says.

We all turn around to leave with smiles on our faces. A second later they all drop off when Saul’s mother comes around the corner. She immediately turns her nose up at Soph and I and makes a beeline for her son.

“Saul, I’ve come to take you home with me,” she says looking at me with complete disdain. Her eyes widen slightly when she takes in Soph’s getup, which only makes me want to laugh. I hold it in not wanting to cause any more hostility for Saul.

“I’m not going with you,” Saul states.

“Don’t be silly, Saul, you need a mother’s love.”

“No, I neither need nor want your love.”

“Don’t be rude, Saul, I didn’t bring you up like that. Just because you hang around with trash doesn’t mean you need to behave like them,” she sneers looking at Soph and me again.

Soph goes to say something and I push her out the door slightly, knowing she’ll be the one to cause more issues and that’s not what Saul needs right now. But also feeling like he needs someone here with him for moral support. He’s never had a problem telling his mother to take a running jump, but I just want to be his quiet strength.

“Shut the hell up,” he replies through gritted teeth.

“Well! There’s no need to be so distasteful, Saul!”

Saul sighs. “Please, just leave Mother. I’m going home with Pea,” he says gesturing to me.

“Her!” his mother screeches pointing at me, “that’s the one right there that nearly got you killed, Saul, and yet she stands here acting like butter wouldn’t melt.” She turns her nose up at me.

I can feel my heart beating in my chest, thumping like it’s going to break right through my ribcage. I want to shout at her. I want to scream, better still I want to punch her, but I restrain myself. I’m not going to give her the satisfaction of having me thrown out or worse, her going to the police to report me for assault, and she would.

“I’m going to tell you something once, and once only, and you better listen Mother,” Saul says so quietly it’s scary. His mother, like me, must cotton onto the fact that he isn’t pissing about. “I am done with you. Through. You didn’t bother with me while I was in here. I know exactly when you were here and for how long. The nurses know everything,” he says and glances out the door. I can see his mother visibly pale. “I don’t need your money, your possessions or your connections. I don’t need you being ashamed of the fact that I’m a photographer, trying to set me up with both jobs and wives from your country club friends. I don’t need you looking down your nose at my real family and telling me how beneath you they are. You have had twenty-seven years of my life. Twenty-seven years I’ve given you to sort your shit out. To be a mum and not a mother. To show me some kind of love that isn’t fabricated or for show. You’ve had your time. Now your time has run out. You won’t see me again. Leave. Now.”

He nods to a nurse in the corridor who comes in and says, “Mrs. James you need to leave, I’m afraid.” She looks shocked like she doesn’t know what she’s supposed to do. Just when I think she’s going to go quietly, I see a look of pure venom take over her eyes and she spins around to Saul.

“I suppose you can say that to me now that you’re leaving the hospital and therefore you don’t need me to pay the private hospital fees that I signed up for!”

Saul looks up at her and smirks. “Don’t worry mother, I paid my fees this morning. You don’t need to put your hand in your pocket.” I can see she’s shaken at that comment, as her guard slips slightly.

“How… I don’t understand.”

“If you’d ever bothered to listen to me, you would know that I’ve made a lot of money doing what you deem to be a silly little hobby. I guess people will pay you well when you’re a Pulitzer Prize winner, huh?” he finishes with a blow to her pride. The sad thing is, I know it’s a blow to her, not because she’s losing her son. No, she will be upset that she didn’t realise what a prestigious photographer her son has turned out to be and that she couldn’t show him off for that reason. The sad thing is, she will still brag about him, he just won’t be on her arm when she does.